The Past Never Sleeps

The Night at the Bar

"You know, you can always ask me what's bothering you." Alex looked at her. Hesitantly she nodded and started re-telling the bits and pieces of the story.

Driving has always been an escape for her... She always used it as a coping mechanism. Especially after a hard day at work.

Timmy was an extremely bright and sweet child. She adored him as her student. But unfortunately, he was always bullied by the older kids. That day she found him crying in the janitor's closet while his usual overgrown glasses were not there with him. They were on the floor, the

glass broken to tiny little shards. She had tried talking to Timmy and his parents. They were reluctant to let her tell the principal, Mr. Walker, about their own son's situation.

Her head was spinning faster than a merry-go-round. She was driving aimlessly. She'd go anywhere but home right now. Actually home is not the right word, housing unit would be perfect. Home was a word used for a place abundant with love, care and everything else a family is supposed to do. She had never known what a real family is. Sure her uncle and aunt had taken her in as their own. But she always felt she was a burden on them.

"Wait" Alex stopped her in the midst of her thoughts. She was so immersed in her story that she forgot she was talking to a real person and not just to the demons in her mind, like she usually does. She saw him typing something in his cellphone. She looked at him while curiosity was slowly clouding her mind.

After 5 minutes or so, he finally stopped typing. "Can you tell me more about this Timmy?" he asked out of the blue. She hadn't noticed he had finally diverted his attention from his cellphone. She was too focused on taking in every intricate detail about this restaurant.

The restaurant had dimmed their lights, creating an avid atmosphere for lovebirds. It was an open kitchen so you can even smell the sweet scent of the freshly baked cakes for desserts, baked breads for appetisers.

She then looked at her food on the plate. The salmon was smoked just the right amount. It was curated with a generous amount of rock salt, and you could still smell the scent of oak through cementing the fact that it was made right on order. It was served with cream cheese, and thinly sliced capers, dills and bell peppers.

'Sarah'... Don't look up. Her aunt used to tell her all the time. 'Sarah' this time the voice was louder. A gentle hand brushed against hers.

She took a deep breath and looked at her brunet companion. "Are you all right?" he asked, his voice drowning with concern. "Yeah," she looked down and murmured in a voice, she was sure he couldn't hear, "maybe". She knew he wasn't convinced but decided to say nothing about the topic.

"Can you tell me more about this boy Timmy and his parents?" he inquired in a tone which seemed to catch Sarah off-guard. The warm ambience of the restaurant seemed out of reach. It was like... happiness was out of reach.

She contemplated whether she should answer his questions or not. Sure he was her best friend in middle and high school. But after college they had grown apart. She was getting to know him all over again. As if he read her mind on cue, he reassured her, "I won't force you to say anything or provide an alibi. I know we're still rebuilding our friendship."

She gulped down her emotions. No one is supposed to see you cry. That's what makes you weak.

She only cried once in public, and that was when she found out her mom and dad will never come back to her. She clenched her fists tight. Her nails were slowly digging into her skin. She could feel her cold blood forming droplets around her nails. "Do you want me to leave you home?" Alex offered.

Sarah's larynx couldn't form words. She just nodded. Hoping the air from the air conditioners would dry out her glossy eyes. Alex asked the waitress for the bill. After paying, they walked and got their coats and into the parking lot. The parking lot was almost empty, only a few cars, here and there.

"I know you meant well," she blurted out, catching him off-guard. "It's just that things have been a..." she paused, searching for the right word, "roller coaster for me these days." she sighed out. Wow, Sarah Harper, when will you learn from the numerous rom-coms that the idea of breaking the silence only sounds better in your head?!

Alex nodded, understanding. "Let's get you home. We can talk more when you're ready." his head hung low focusing on the grey asphalt, "Okay?". He silently wished that she didn't notice the reference to 'The Fault in Our Stars'. "Okay." she mentally smirked at this reference.

The silence during the ride back home was undisputed. She gazed out the window. The perfect little houses with families having dinner with their parents and kids. Everyone was acting like the last few days didn't even happen. But she knew, everyone had one constant fear... or rather question, burning like flames inside their hearts. What if the murderer was in their own little homes?

"Don't you want to enter that house today?" hearing that familiar voice, she was taken out of her trance. She turned to him. He was outside and leaning down on the door to reach her eye level. "Yeah, it's just..." she looked into his honey eyes, searching for the right word. "Everything I used to believe to be true is all feeling like a lie, a façade, if you will."

He just nodded in response. That's when she saw the hurt in his usually bright, honey eyes. But now, they look like they just lost their meaning to shine. Shrugging it off, she got down the car.

She could feel his burning stare on her. She should feel uncomfortable, instead she felt safe. She felt at home. The minute she reached her porch, she turned around and gave him a small but genuine smile. He returned it back but unlike Sarah, it was not genuine. The gleam that could make anyone like him was nowhere to be seen. He got in the car and drove off.

Sarah unlocked the door and entered her house. It smelled of lavender. She must have kept her air diffuser on. She took in the calming scent, not regretting the fact that she would need to buy a whole new bottle of essential oil.

Well, as much as she would like to just sink to the floor and forget, even if it is just for an hour, that there is a murderer killing people in cold-blood. She couldn't. Not when her own parents had some kind of play in it.

She slowly walked to the bedroom, in hopes to catch some z's. Tomorrow was again a Monday. Now, don't get her wrong. She loves kids, except when the town they live in is plagued in a murder, with whom she could possibly connect to. All she now wanted to do was sleep, or at least lie in her bed.

She checked the date on the calendar and it suddenly all made sense why Alex was so sad. It was the 11th of July.

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I just received a lecture from my friend that I shouldn't stay up so late. I might have stayed up all night reading a book and then watching Netflix. And gulped down 5 cups of black coffee.

Question: Can you throw in some murder book recs down in the comments?