It's insecurity always chasing you and standing in the way of your dreams. - Vin Diesel.
I was naked and exposed, emotionally stripped of every boundary I had ever built. He pulled them down in a single swoop. His voice broke through my deep, dark thoughts on a cold night not so long ago, piercing the silence with concern that silenced the demons I was battling.
I fell into those eyes with hesitation, but ultimately, I couldn't stop myself. The vile path of thoughts that had invaded my mind as I ran down the ship's deck was sickening and deafening. I realised I was weaker than I had thought, but when he took my hands in his, the strength he possessed seeped into my body. It filled me with determination to live and not let my demons win. I had lived with them for a while; they laughed at my pathetic attempts to succumb, but they would not triumph. I might suffer a while longer, but during that suffering, I would grow and learn new things.
I surrendered to him, following my heart rather than my head. I gave him my hand and entrusted my life to him; he pulled me back and gave me a reason to live. The demons seemed to fade away; he was a force from above, fighting alongside me. He taught me to live in the moment, for all could change instantly.
I opened my heart and soul for the first time in my youth, knowing that this decision would stay with me forever. I would remember these moments—defining and beautiful—always. In just a few short days, I had become a woman, capable of expressing my mind, a modern woman. I was no longer seen as perfect; I had imperfections that he embraced and nurtured, allowing me to feel no longer inadequate.
The things my mother criticised about me were the very traits he admired most. He placed me on a pedestal I felt I deserved. When he took me into his arms for the first time, I fell into him, those eyes I had avoided for so long, drawing me in. I had to give in.
We danced so fast that I barely had time to think. Then he held me tenderly, his arm across my lower back, firm yet gentle. Our eyes met, and we spoke wordlessly to each other.
I made a wish upon a shooting star, just as my Nanna used to say. As I breathed slowly with his face so close to mine, I felt my wish had come true. Overwhelming feelings surged through my body, making me dizzy...and then I walked away.
In my mother's attempts to tear us apart, my heart only grew stronger. The demons wouldn't return, nor would they win—neither would my fiancé.
Then he came to me to rescue me, but I realised I had to rescue myself. I was the butterfly trapped inside the goddamn jar, not him, and I needed to free myself rather than be freed. I found my way out; I escaped and went to him. He taught me how to spread my wings and fly. Then, the demons returned.
"You'll always fall, but then you will soar," he whispered as he spread my wings. The wind hit our faces, awakening my senses, and I saw my future with new eyes. It lay in the sunrise, alongside Jack Dawson, a fresh start on the horizon.
Nothing could tear us apart, not even the sinking of the Titanic. As we stood on the boat deck of the Carpathia, his grip tightened around me.
"What do you see when you look at me?" I asked, doubts momentarily creeping back into my mind. I had left my family and home for this man I had known for merely three days.
"My future, my home, and my everything," he whispered as we approached Lady Liberty, standing tall and proud. My breath caught in my throat; I felt happy beneath the grey, wet skies. My demons left me, and they never returned.
