Her Captor, Her Savior

Raffe Sloane: Doubt

I watched quietly as Evelyn's sobs wracked her body, the weight of her past crashing down on her. She huddled on the edge of the bed, knees pulled to her chest, looking like she might break any second. I stood a few feet away, watching, feeling every tear like a knife to my gut.

She finally looked up, her eyes red and face pale. "Raffe... did you...how many?" Her voice was a whisper, barely holding together.

I could lie. But that wasn't what she needed. She needed the truth, no matter how brutal it was.

"Yes," I said, my voice low but steady.

Her breath caught in her throat, and she flinched like I'd slapped her. "How many? How many people have you killed?"

My fists clenched at my sides. I'd lost count. I wasn't proud of it, but I wasn't ashamed either. Not until now.

"More than I should've. But every one of them deserved it."

She shook her head, trying to make sense of what I was saying. I could see the fear in her eyes, the confusion, but also a glimmer of trust. She wasn't running. She wasn't screaming.

"Why, Raffe?" Her voice cracked, and I felt the words tear through me. "Why did you kill them? Why... me?"

I swallowed hard, stepping closer. "I had my reasons."

Her eyes widened, the fear creeping back in. She was thinking of the man—the one she barely remembered, the one who'd taken everything from her. "Tell me."

I sat beside her, careful not to touch her just yet, not after the way she had backed up from me. "It started with Fiona. My sister." I started. 

Evelyn's breath stilled, listening intently as I let her in for the first time. 

"She was like you. Innocent. Sweet. The world saw her as prey." I felt my throat tighten as I spoke. "They took her, Evelyn. They took her, and they broke her."

Tears welled in her eyes again, but she stayed silent, letting me continue.

"I tried to find her. For months, I searched. And when I finally did... it was too late. They killed her, and I wasn't able to save her."

Evelyn's lip trembled, her hand reaching out on instinct. She stopped just before touching me, hesitating.

"That's why I kill them. The men who do this—who destroy women like my sister, like you. They don't get to walk away free."

She blinked through her tears, trying to process everything. "You... you killed them for her? And for me?"

I nodded, my chest tightening. "I couldn't let it happen again, Evelyn. Not after what I saw with her. Not when I saw it in your eyes, too."

She bit her lip, trying to stay composed, but I could see her shaking. "So... every man? All of them... they were like him?"

I nodded again, the truth hanging heavy between us. "The ones I killed? Yes. They were predators. They thought they could get away with it. But I made sure they didn't."

Her shoulders sagged, relief mixing with the horror. "And... do you ever regret it?"

I hesitated. This was the part that twisted me up inside. "I didn't. Not until you."

She stared at me, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I didn't doubt what I was doing until you came into my life," I admitted, my voice low, strained. "With you, it's different. I see you look at me, and I wonder... am I really better than the men I've killed? Or am I just another monster?"

Her hand, trembling, finally reached for mine. She held on tightly like I was her lifeline. "You're not like them, Raffe. You're not."

I wanted to believe her. But doubt had been creeping in, inch by inch, since the moment I met her. She made me question everything. And that terrified me.

"I don't know if I'm still that man, Evelyn," I whispered. "I don't know if what I've done... if I can come back from it."

She squeezed my hand, her voice small but sure. "You saved me. You saved others, too."

Her words shook me to my core. I had saved her, hadn't I? I pulled her out of that nightmare. But now, with her looking at me like this, I wondered if I'd just dragged her into another one.

"I don't regret saving you," I said, my voice rough. "But I don't know if I'm a man you should trust."

Her lips trembled, tears still glistening in her eyes, but she didn't let go of my hand. "I trust you, Raffe. I feel safe with you."

That... that nearly broke me. She felt safe. After everything she'd been through, after everything I'd told her, she still felt safe with me.

"I don't deserve that," I said softly.

"Maybe not," she whispered, "but you have it."

The doubt was still there, gnawing at me, but for now, with her hand in mine, it was quieter. I would wrestle with it later, in the dark. For now, I had her.

"I'll never let anyone hurt you again," I promised, my voice barely audible, but she heard it. I'd make sure no one ever came close to her again.

Evelyn nodded, her body still trembling, but her grip on me was steady. "Just... stay with me," she whispered. "I need you."

I pulled her close then, her body fitting against mine as she shuddered in my arms. I didn't know if I could ever wash the blood from my hands, but as long as she needed me, I'd fight for her. Every day, I'd fight for her.

Even if I wasn't sure what kind of man that made me anymore.