Come back to me [SOPE]

Chapter 10

J-Hope was sprawled out on the cold floor of his living room, Evvie sleeping soundly on his chest. He was lost in a confused dream, one where he saw different versions of Suga from their past-childhood, the chubby-cheeked Suga; teenage, the lanky, fishbone version; and finally, the plump-faced lawyer he knew now, all flashing that familiar gummy smile. It was a dream J-Hope didn't want to wake from, one that brought back memories of the warmth they once shared.

But a noise pulled him out of the dream-banging. His eyes fluttered open. What was it? A knock? Slowly, he realized someone was knocking at the door. Evvie was still peacefully asleep on his chest, so J-Hope gently lifted him, placing him carefully on the sofa. He glanced at the clock. 2:30 AM.

"Who the hell is knocking at this hour?" J-Hope muttered, still half-asleep himself. He peered through the door lens and froze. Suga was standing outside, looking disheveled and a little red in the face. J-Hope blinked, thinking his brain was playing tricks on him. But no, it was really Suga.

He swung the door open, worried. "Hyung... Are you alright?"

Suga was unsteady, his balance off. J-Hope realized immediately that he was drunk. "Hyung... come inside." He quickly grabbed Suga by the shoulder and guided him into the apartment, closing the door behind them.

Suga fumbled with his pockets, eventually pulling out a phone. He waved it at J-Hope, his voice loud and slurred, "You little rascal... Can't you even keep your phone safe? You left it behind!"

J-Hope stared at his phone in Suga's hand, surprised. He hadn't even realized he'd left it behind after everything that had happened that night. Taking it back, he said, "Ah, how did it-uh... okay, hyung. Sorry, I must've left it in your car. Thanks for bringing it back, but... it's too late for this, hyung. "

J-Hope was still feeling the effects of the drinks he'd had earlier, but nowhere near as much as Suga, who had clearly gone for a second round after getting home. Suga's voice was a slurry mess, "You can't... take care of what's yours..."

J-Hope furrowed his brows. "Sorry, hyung."

"Phone... husband... you leave everything behind..." Suga muttered, his words heavy with bitterness and hurt.

J-Hope stood there, heart pounding as those words sank in. Suga was talking about more than just the phone. And now, J-Hope was at a loss for what to say, staring at the man who had just hurled a truth he wasn't ready to face.

After a long, heavy silence, Suga finally spoke, his voice low but cutting, "Tell me otherwise... Can you?"

J-Hope's voice trembled with the hurt of a wounded puppy. "Hyung..."

Suga remained quiet, his gaze distant.

"Hyung... I never wanted anyone but you. I didn't even know you had suspicions about TaeTae. If I had known, we could've talked about it. Why didn't you confront me?"

Suga sighed, the weight of years pressing down on his chest. "Honestly, I thought it was true. Your absence didn't help. I didn't want to be left behind."

J-Hope stared at the floor, his heart aching. "..."

"Your friends always said you could've aimed higher in love. I thought I was holding you back. It seemed like it was time for me to step back," Suga muttered, recalling the colorless days that had become their normal.

J-Hope clenched his fists, the feeling of being accused falsely starting to gnaw at him. "Hyung... You were the one crushing on that tattooed back bastard for so long. If I hadn't asked you out shamelessly, again and again, you would've ended up with him, right? Didn't you think about how insecure that made me feel? How many times I thought I'd worn you down just with my persistence? Did you ever love me? Or did you just stay with me because I forced you to?"