Whispers in the Midst of Chasms

31

The next morning, my phone buzzed on the kitchen counter as I was preparing breakfast for Kaiden. I glanced at the screen and felt a knot tighten in my stomach.

Keous: Can we talk later? About Kaiden? 

Bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko, at kinagat ko ang aking labi. damang dama ko pa rin ang tensyon sa pagitan naming dalawa, pero alam ko na dapat naming ayusin to, hindi sa kapakanan naming dalawa, pati narin kay Kaiden. Bumuntong hininga ako bago nag type ng mensahe para i send sakanya. 

Me: Yeah, we can talk. When?

I waited, nervously flipping pancakes for Kaiden, who sat at the table, humming softly to himself. A few seconds later, my phone buzzed again.

Keous: Maybe after Kaiden's school? We could spend some time together, like a family.

I stared at the message, my thoughts swirling. Family. That word felt both comforting and terrifying. The idea of the three of us being together like a family was something I had dreamed of for so long, but the weight of everything we had been through made it hard to fully grasp.

I hesitated for a moment, then typed my response.

Me: Okay. Let's try.

PAGKATAPOS ng klase ni Kaiden ay dumeretso agad kami sa park malapit sa apartment paramakapag usap, para nadin makapag bonding. Hawak naming dalawa ang kamay ni Kaiden, nasa gilid ito at sa kabilang banda naman ako. Puno ng excitment ang mukha ni Kaiden, alam kong masaya ito at sa wakas, tatlo na kami ang mag kasamang gumagala.

Kaiden was running ahead now, laughing as he chased a butterfly, and for a brief moment, everything felt almost... normal. Like we were a real family.

But I could sense the heaviness in Keous's gaze, as if he were holding something back. Finally, as Kaiden wandered a bit further from us, he turned to me.

"Dahlia, there's something I need to say."

I tensed. "What is it, Keous?"

His eyes flicked toward Kaiden before meeting mine again. "I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want to lose any more time with him. With you. I want to be a part of Kaiden's life... fully." Naramdaman ko nanamng bumibilis ang tibok ng puso ko, hindi ko maikakaila ang sinseridad sa boses nito, pero ang bigat at sakit ng nakaraan ay nandito parin.

"I know," I whispered. "But it's not that simple, Keous. There's so much between us—between you and him—that we need to figure out."

He nodded, his expression pained but determined. "I get that. I know it's going to take time. But I'm willing to fight for it, Dahlia. For him. For us."

Kaiden ran back toward us, laughing, unaware of the serious conversation that had just passed. He tugged on my hand, then on Keous's.

"Can we go get ice cream now, Mommy? Daddy?"

My heart clenched as I heard him call Keous "Daddy" for the first time. I glanced at Keous, who looked like he had been hit by a wave of emotion. His eyes softened, and for the first time in a long while, I saw something other than pain and anger in his expression.

"Yeah, buddy," Keous said softly, his voice almost breaking. "Let's go get some ice cream."

We walked together, the three of us, as a fragile sense of hope began to flicker in the air.

That evening, after our ice cream outing, the mood had shifted ever so slightly. Pauwi nadin kami at tulog na si Kaiden sa likod ng sasakyan, ayaw pa sana nitong kumawala sa bisig ni Keous kung hindi si Keous ang nag sabi sakanya. Hindi ko maikailang simula nung araw na nalaman ni Keous ang lahat ay naging magaan para saakin ang lahat, nalinawan ako pati ang dating ako.