Slide Into Me - A Woosan Story

Nine - Shadows & Light

Wooyoung couldn't shake the feeling that Jake's presence had cast a long shadow over the rest of the day. As he and San walked through the zoo, Wooyoung felt a knot of unease tightening in his stomach. Jake was hot, well dressed and very confident. There was no denying it. Seeing him, seeing the way San had stiffened beside him, made Wooyoung's insecurities bubble to the surface. He tries not to compare himself to Jake, but he can't help feeling like maybe he's lacking. 

They hadn't said much since leaving the café. San had been quieter than usual, his usual light-hearted teasing absent, his smiles noticeably forced. Wooyoung glanced over at him, wanting to ask what was wrong, but already knowing the answer. It was Jake. The confrontation had rattled them both more than either wanted to admit. The air seemed to take on a bit of a chill. 

Wooyoung shoved his hands into his pockets as they strolled past the lion enclosure, trying to keep his voice casual. "You've been quiet." He peeked up at San from beneath his eyelashes.

San shrugged, his eyes fixed ahead. "Just thinking..." He replied quietly.

Wooyoung waited for more, but nothing came. The weight of the silence felt heavier with each passing second. He hated how the mood had shifted since seeing Jake, how their easy connection felt strained now.

"Is it about that guy, Jake?" Wooyoung finally asked, the words feeling heavier than he'd intended. Partly a bit annoyed at himself for even bringing Jake up. 

San hesitated, then sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "I don't know. Maybe."

Wooyoung swallowed hard, his chest tightening. He'd expected as much, but hearing it stung all the same. San said softly, "You know, I told you he doesn't mean anything to me anymore."

Wooyoung nodded. "I know. I believe you." His voice softened a little, but there was a bit of an edge to it. San was clearly trying to calm the adrenaline reaction of seeing his ex. "It's just... seeing him today threw me off. He's... well, he's manipulative, but once upon a time I thought he liked me, made me laugh, he was fun, and a complete liar." San sighed before continuing. "He made me feel like maybe I...."

"What?" Wooyoung asked, feeling the flicker of doubt rising in his chest.

San stopped walking, turning to face him fully, his brow furrowed. "Like maybe I'm not enough."

Wooyoung's breath caught in his throat. That was the last thing he wanted San to feel. He reached out, placing a hand on San's arm, trying to catch his gaze. "What? No, San. You are enough. More than enough. You are wonderful." He stopped short of telling San he also felt that way.

Wooyoung looked away, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know, San. I felt it too. He showed up, and the way he looked at you... I could tell he's not over you. And it made me feel like I'm competing with someone I didn't even know was still in the picture." 

San's heart clenched. He knew how it must've looked to Wooyoung, but the last thing he wanted was for him to feel like he had to compete with a ghost from the past. "You're not competing with anyone," San said firmly. "Jake may not be over it, but I am. I'm with you. I don't want him."

Wooyoung  met his eyes, but there was still doubt there, a flicker of something unresolved. "I trust you, San. But I can't help feeling... I don't know, like I'm not on his level. He's got that whole tall, dark, handsome thing going on. I'm just—"

San cut him off, stepping closer. "You're just what? Young-ah, you're incredible. I don't care what Jake looks like, or what he thinks he wants. I want you. No one else."

Wooyoung looked down at his feet, his voice quieter now. "I don't know. I just didn't like seeing him look at you, look me up and down, assessing me. I didn't like how that made me feel about myself."

San's chest ached hearing the doubt in Wooyoung's voice. He wanted to fix it, to reassure him in every way he could, but he also knew that insecurity wasn't something he could solve with a few comforting words. "You don't have to feel like that. Not with me." He hesitated, then added, "Jake and I had a toxic relationship. It was never healthy, and the person he's holding onto isn't the person I am now."

Wooyoung blinked, looking back up at him. "Really?"

"Yeah," San said, his voice soft but steady. "You make me feel like I can actually be myself. With Jake, I was always on edge, trying to be who he wanted. Our relationship was largely performative, he liked how I looked, liked showing me off, but wasn't at all interested in me.  It's night and day with you... I get to be me. You see all of me, not just the physique, that's why I'm with you, not him."

Wooyoung's expression softened, but there was still that lingering doubt in his eyes. "I'm sorry I've been in my head," he said after a pause. "I didn't mean to let it get to me, I just... I care about you. And the thought of someone else trying to come between us messes with my head."

San felt a surge of warmth, a mixture of relief and affection. He reached out and took Woo's hand, squeezing it gently. "No one's coming between us. I promise."

Wooyoung looked at him for a long moment, then nodded slowly. "Okay. I'll try not to let it get to me."

San smiled, pulling Wooyoung a little closer. "Good. Because honestly, Jake showing up was the least interesting part of today." He leaned in, his voice teasing. "The best part is being here with you. And I don't want anything, or anyone, to ruin that."

Wooyoung's lips quirked into a small smile, the tension in his shoulders easing. "Alright, alright. I guess I'm kind of lucky, then."

San chuckled, relief flooding through him. "You're not 'kind of' lucky. You are lucky." He paused, then added with a grin, "And so am I."

They stood there for a moment, the weight of the earlier tension lifting, leaving them standing in the fading sunlight, feeling more connected than before. Wooyoung leaned in and kissed San, soft and slow, the kind of kiss that made him forget about everything else.

When they finally pulled apart, San's eyes had a warmth in them that Wooyoung loved.

Feeling the warmth between them return, San smiled. "You ready to get back to enjoying our day?"

"Definitely," Wooyoung replied, a playful glint in his eye. "Let's go find those penguins."

As they walked side by side, San felt lighter, excited to continue their adventure together, knowing they faced the first of many hurdles but they did so together, and that made San's heart feel more secure than it ever had before.