The Hybrid

27: Beck

"What's up?" Ben asks as we leave the dining hall behind.

"I need you to go to the library. Do some research, and look up everything you can about wolf heat. Try to find something that will help or even stop tonight from happening. If you can find a way to keep our desires at bay, tonight won't be so unbearable. I want this to go smoothly for both of our sakes."

"Wait, you actually want to stop this?" He asks, putting his arm out, signaling me to stop along with him.

"That is why I'm asking you to do this," I reply with a nod.

"But back there you didn't seem too opposed to the idea of her marking you. I figured you wouldn't mind letting things happen naturally...Unless I read the situation wrong."

I narrow my eyes at his last sentence. He's fishing, hoping I'll give up more information by confirming or denying something. I hate it when he does that.

"It doesn't matter what I want or what I don't want, Bennett. You heard what she said. She doesn't want to mark me."

"What I heard was she makes a lot of assumptions about how you feel about her. Assumptions that I don't think are true."

"Again, that doesn't matter," I say, rolling my eyes and moving again. He follows, easily falling into step with me again.

"Why not?"

"Because regardless of if she was wrong about my feelings for her, she was right about one thing. She deserves more, more than me, more than I could ever give her. She doesn't deserve to be tied down to me someone like me just because she made the mistake of marking me while under the influence of the moon."

"What if she wasn't?"

"What if she wasn't what?" I ask, my patience running thin.

"What if she wasn't under the influence of the moon?"

I groan, "Stop asking me about shit that doesn't matter. It's never going to happen and on the off chance it ever did, it wouldn't be on a full moon. I'd want her to know exactly what she's doing and getting herself into. On a full moon, she wouldn't. It can't happen tonight, Bennett. Not like this. Do you understand me?"

I pause, catching his eyes so he can see me and know how serious I am.

Reluctantly, he nods, "Yeah, I got you."

"Good, now do as I asked you, and if you won't, bring the books to my office. I'll do the research myself."

******

8 hours later and I'm antsy. I can't sit still. I want out of this room, but the full moon is only a couple of hours away now. Nobody would trust me not to go to her and if I'm being honest, I don't trust myself either.

If it weren't for my brother and Christie hovering over me, I probably would've already knocked the guards outside the door out and made my great escape. Which is alarming, to say the least. The moon hasn't even reached its apex and I'm already considering violence just to get to her.

"So you found nothing in the library?" I ask, getting up to pace the expanse of my bedroom.

I don't usually just allow people to hang out in my room, but desperate times. My father insisted I have constant company throughout the night and he didn't trust Christie to be helpful on her own. I didn't want company at all however secretly I'm grateful for my brother's presence acting as buffer. For whatever reason Christie's presence is annoying the shit out of me, more than it has recently. If not for him she definitely would've tried to mount me by now and the way I would reject her would only bring more drama from her. Drama I just can't take right now. My head's already pounding and the temperature in the room is rising steadily. I can't focus on anything, but that and keeping my ass in this room until sunrise.

"Nope, nothing more than what Willow already told us." My brother answers, looking up from the book he's reading, "Well, I did read something about it being painful until you're marked. Headaches, hot flashes, possible fever, extreme horniness. You know, the regular degular shit. I tried calling Willow's mother, but she didn't answer. Probably because she didn't recognize the number."

He shrugs nonchalantly, returning his attention to his book.

"What were you doing calling Willow's mother?"

"Trying to get more information. You put them on our phone plan. The number wasn't hard to find."

If it weren't for him attempting to be productive, I would be much more annoyed with him calling her mother. She obviously liked him much more than she did me when we met. I don't blame her. I wasn't very nice. That doesn't mean I'm not bothered by the fact that the closest person to Willow would prefer my brother over me. After everything that's happened, I wouldn't be surprised if Willow preferred him over me too.

Just the idea sends a rush of jealousy through me. This can be added to a list of things that's never happened to me before I met Willow. The feeling is ugly and makes me want to do unimaginable sick things to my own brother just so I can have her all to myself.

The thoughts have my next question flying out of my mouth before I can stop it. "You don't want Willow, do you?"

He looks up again, this time his eyebrows raised so far they're practically disappearing into his hairline. "Like romantically?"

I nod. His need for clarification only slightly irritates me, though I can feel how quickly that will change depending on his answer.

His face twists in disgust. "Jesus, no. I see Willow as a friend, a sister at most."

"Good because if it wasn't clear before if she's gonna be with anybody here, it's gonna be me. She's mine." I say, the possessiveness in my tone surprising even me.

He holds up his hands in surrender, "There is nothing I'd like to see more than you two together. She's all yours, Beck. I promise."

Mine. She's mine. Saying it, hearing him saying sends tingles of pleasure down my spine. I love saying it. I love hearing it. If only it could be true. Calling her mine has her face popping into my head. Her pretty brown eyes sucking me into a daze and making it too hot for clothes anymore.

Without thinking I begin stripping out my jacket and shirt.

"Woah, what're you doing?" My brother asks, standing from his chair.

"Getting ready for me?" Christie purrs, emerging from the bathroom in a towel, steam rolling out with her from her long shower.

"Okay, both of you need to put clothes on like now. There will be no funny business with me in the room!" My brother orders, nervously glancing between the two of us as if weighing whether or not he'd be able to stop us. Lucky for him my desire for anyone that isn't Willow is nonexistent at the moment.

"Do you not feel how hot it is in here?" I ask, fighting the urge to take my pants off too. It's been heating up slowly over the last few hours, but the subtle heat is turning to a burning scorch at a much more rapid pace now leaving me sweaty and weak as I take a seat at the edge of my bed.

Ben approaches me, his thinking face slipping into place. Slowly he lifts his hand and rests the back of it against my forehead. I'm so tired all of a sudden, I don't even bother to swipe it away.

"You're burning up. I think the heat is starting to kick in. I'll call Olivia and see how Willow is doing."

"Put it on speaker," I say, leaving no room for argument as he whips out his phone. He hits a few buttons on the touch screen and then lays it flat on the bed when it begins to ring.

Christie moves and tries to stand between my legs, but I close them, shying away from her touch. Even having her close to me makes my skin crawl for the simple fact that she is not her.

I want nothing more than to feel the sparkle of Willow's touch right now. I'm craving it. I'm craving her. The only thing that could soothe me now is her. Her touch, her smell, her warmth, her everything. I want it. I want it all and pretty soon I'll need it.