Fly

Trouble with a capital J

My dainty paws struck the ground rhythmically, and repetitively. My legs stretching out fully, increasing my speed until I could go no faster. The harder I ran, the sooner I would get to where I wanted so desperately to be.

After recognising the road so quickly, I knew Breeze would've done the same, and providing all went well, she should already be there.

My thought were quickly interrupted by the sound of scurrying paws behind me. I had to fight very hard to prevent my 'flight' instinct taking over, and instead, calmly slowed down, turning sharply so that I came to a standstill facing the mysterious owner of the racing paws. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw Bo before me.

"W...what...how?", I stammered. He shrugged. Suddenly, I felt guilt washing over me; I had just left him there, without even considering him. I was mortified with myself.

"Hey, don't worry about it, Storm.", he said, almost as if he had read my inner most sub-conscious thought. "I understand that Breeze means a lot to you."

I stared in awe at the young dog. It don't seem possible that a pup so young could be so mature and well informed.

"Bo, how did this happen?"

"How did what happen, Storm?", he counter-questioned.

"You. How did a dog like you end up in rescue?" His eyes widened with a mixture of fear and sadness; I knew I had touched on a weak spot. "But you don't have to tell me...", I hastily added, knowing first-hand how hard it could be to talk about our troubled pasts.

"Oh...that... Well, Storm, you of all dogs will know what it's like to be brought into a family that doesn't really want you, to love someone like you never thought possible, and the heartbreak when you see them driving away from you. The hope stays with you until you go insane; how could your best friend do something like that to you, we were going to be friends for life, weren't we?

Everyday you ask yourself the same thing; 'why?'. Plainly and simply, why? Was it something I did, was it just inevitable? But you end up alone nonetheless; alone and heartbroken. You swear never to love someone you have a chance of losing, but you do...stupidly, you do. Sometimes you're lucky, they turn out to be the one. Other times, the same thing happens again.

I've had seven homes, Storm; the same thing happening again and again. New baby here, and unwanted Christmas present there. I'm still in rescue because I don't want a home. They're all the same; they love you, and foolishly you let them into your heart. Then they crush you, slowly, painfully, they crush you until your heart is nothing more than a shell of what it used to be.

I followed you, Storm so I could see for myself what love is. I want to see the love in you girl's eyes when she sees you again, the adoration she looks at you with each and every time you successfully take a jump, the happiness you give one another. I need to see if it's real, or if it's just something that we lonely pups dream about as a way of staying alive when we're forced to endure those isolated months in kennels. If I could see it just once, my life would have a purpose again..."

I blinked, repeatedly. I was speechless, frozen stock still as I remembered all those hours spent alone in a kennel, all the people who broke my young, naive and still innocent heart. All the times I had wanted to give up, well, they were nothing, absolutely nothing, compared to what Bo had been through.