Ace in a Hole: Collaborative Shenenigans

Chapter 15

When the wedding arrives, Alastor shows up to earth in his brand-new suit. A tad bit vintage, but still stylish and classic enough to not draw too much attention to himself. His morning is spent carefully ironing out the suit, brushing his teeth until they shimmer, and combing his hair to just the right amount of fluffiness. The gift is already carefully wrapped up, tucked into a corner of his radio tower in case any of the other hotel guests dared to snoop. And that's why he made sure to lock his room before he got ready in his human form, making sure everything was prim and proper. It has been a while since he's been to a wedding.

Last time had been their neighbor, Miss Kathleen got married to a sweet farmer boy from the south. He had an overbite and receding hairline, but both were sickly in love and gooey romantic with one another. As far as he's aware, neither of them went to hell. When he arrived, he kept a mental note of who he knew down there, and those two never came up. While he didn't care, he found that heaven made sense when he lingered on it. They always let Alastor sneak on over and grab some medicine if his Pa was rough that day. Kathleen's husband, short and scrawny, as if built like a scarecrow, even dared to stand up to his Father once or twice. Kind people, those two. That's why he didn't mind attending their wedding, watching them find their bliss from the back.

Of course, now that he's in hell, people simply didn't pass out wedding invitations like candy. Weddings were small or pointless, so Alastor either didn't get invited or didn't attend. No one would bother to invite the radio demon of all people, not when they savored their lives in hell.

Yet here he was, looking himself up and down in the mirror. Brown suit. Bowtie. Shirt perfectly tucked in. Not a wrinkle in sight. Even if his image wasn't something he consciously watched, he would have fretted over his appearance anyway. Papyrus was Sans's everything. Daring to come looking like a lazy slob would get him tossed on his ass.

When he has everything ready, both himself and the present wrapped exquisitely, he opens up his portal to Sans' location. Sans wasn't at his home, not for that night. Papyrus and Grillby had their chosen best people sleepover that night to help get ready, and while Alastor was invited to that as well, he doubts a sleepover would be a good idea with someone he cared nothing about. Alastor doesn't think his and Sans' shenanigans would be tamed by the context of a social sleepover. One of them would have woken up with some type of inappropriate or stupid drawing on their arms or legs.

The wedding was not allowed to be ruined, under any context. The sleepover was other territory.

Alastor arrives on Earth in a hallway, one he's not familiar with at all. They had agreed upon a time for Sans to get himself alone so Alastor could show up, and it seemed the skeleton had chosen a secluded back hallway of the facility where the wedding would take place. Sans himself is wearing a nice suit, with a hint of eyeliner underneath his eye sockets to make them pop and the tips of his fingers neatly filed. His bestie is leaning against the wall, on his phone with someone before Alastor strolls in. After hearing the portal open, Sans perks, and begins to search his surroundings until he locks onto Alastor. Alastor is quick to step through, landing on the plush carpet as he steadies the wrapped gift.

"Sans, darling, what a perfect day for a wedding!" He sings out, glancing towards the window. Snowing, as expected. Light, feathery snowflakes that cascade down the sky. Alastor hasn't seen white snow since he was alive. It's a beauty to behold. "You look rather nice today. It's about time you went from shit to average looks."

"Aw, thanks bud," Sans practically sings back, his voice almost delirious from joy. "You look nice as well. Like an old vintage painting that's been shit on."

"Thank you. That's what I was going for. The classic era where people actually cared."

Sans does need to wear more suits. Alastor is going to make sure his personal tailors are all on standby when Sans ends up down there. Sure, he'll let the skeleton pick his own wardrobe, but he will have a required few suits or nicer tops thrown into the mix. And a onesie, since that's funny to think about.