in for the ride

oh - chpt fifteen

"Bye, jon."

————

The phone on my wall had rung four times since I had gotten home last night, and each time, I ignored it out of fear. I shouldn't have kissed jon, but again, it just felt right.

God dammit, it's always him. I huffed as I rubbed my face in my hands, exhausted by my own feelings. The phone on my wall started ringing again and I wanted to bash my head into a wall. A headache was already forming and I didn't wanna talk to anyone.

But, I stood up anyways and checked the caller ID.

Jon.

I watched the phone ring for a little longer before it stopped. I wasn't gonna answer his calls, I don't wanna hear it, nor do I wanna talk about it. I looked at the last calls and sure enough, three of them were him, and another one was a spam call.

I sat back down on my couch and mindlessly watched the tv. My thoughts were racing and I wanted so badly for them to just shut up, but I'm too anxious for that to ever happen.

Would Kimberly Davis even sound good...?

I felt my face heat up at the thought and I immediately covered my head in my hands.

Why the fuck am I thinking about that?

I sighed into my hands and threw my head back on my couch. I wanted to scream and cry and dance and throw up. I felt like I was going insane.

———

I passed out on my couch from being utterly exhausted. I jolted awake to the sound of banging on my apartment door.

"What the fuck?" I grumbled as I rubbed my face, squinting my eyes to look at my clock. I managed to accidentally nap for five hours. It was now eight at night.

The frantic knocking on my door started up again and I stumbled over to the door, unlocking it and opening it. My eyes were met with Jon's.

"Kim, what the fuck?"

"Huh?" I furrowed my brows, my head not working right.

Jon gave me an 'are you kidding me' look as he crossed his arms. "Dude, what the fuck!? You can't just fucking kiss me then leave me high and dry!"

Those words made me realize what this was actually about, the gears in my head finally turning. "Oh." I simply said.

Jon closed the door behind him. "Oh? Is that all you have to say? Do you like toying with people's emotions? Is that how you get off?" He took a couple of steps towards me as I took a couple of steps back.

"I- uh-"

Jon took another step towards me as I stepped back once more. "'I-uh-'" He mocked me. "Kim, I'm tired of your bullshit, have you not changed in the past- what- three years?" His arms lashed at his sides. My mouth moved as if I was going to say something, but nothing came out.

"God dammit Kim, I fucking like you. Fuck that, I think I fucking love you. I fucking hate you, but I love you, I really do." Jon's eyes sparkled as he yelled at me. Even in such a broken state he looked so gorgeous.