Life In The Spotlight

Chapter 24 (Present)

"Shu, what's the matter?" asked his mother. "You have been really quiet since yesterday."

"I'm fine," said Shu tonelessly. He kept his gaze focused on Sora wearing her wedding dress, which had finally arrived. For some strange reason, Sora didn't look as excited as Shu had expected her to be.

"You don't look fine," said Shu's mother. "You wouldn't eat dinner or breakfast. It's clear that something is the matter."

"I said I'm fine!" snapped Shu before storming off to his room.

Shu felt bad for yelling, but honestly he wasn't feeling too good. His nightmares had been worse last night and his appetite had completely vanished. He wanted to talk to Rose, but he wasn't sure what to say if he did call her.

Why did having a crush feel great and awful at the same time? Shu felt light-hearted whenever he thought of Rose. Then he would remember Seina and feel sick.

Shu didn't tell any of his friends what happened. He didn't want anyone to worry about him. Besides, how would he explain it?

Shu ended up dozing off for a while, but he woke up to hear sobs. And it sounded like Sora.

Shu went to Sora's room to see the almost bride sobbing in her pillow. She was still wearing the poofy wedding dress.

"Sora? What's wrong?" asked Shu.

"I can't do it, Shu."

"Can't do what?" asked Shu.

"I don't think I can get married!!!"

"But I thought you were looking forward to it," said Shu.

"I was. But I was romanticising what it was all about. I always saw weddings as a beautiful ceremony and a chance to be a princess for a day. But I'm going to be someone's wife! I will be Mrs Silva!"

"You can always keep your maiden name," said Shu.

"Like that would help."

"Don't you love Matt?"

"Yes, but I don't know if I can commit myself to being his wife forever. I don't want to marry someone and end up divorcing him later on. I want an eternal happy ending."

Sora suddenly went quiet. "Sorry. That was insensitive. It was sort of similar to what you went through with Seina."

Shu thought of Seina and his stomach clenched. But that gave him food for thought. For now he saw that Seina had contributed nothing to the relationship at all.

It had always been Shu who gave words of affection. Shu always put Seina before himself, which was something Seina never did. Shu had given all the love he had to receive none in return.

"Sora, what does Matt do for you?"

"Well, Matt gives me a cup of tea when I am feeling tired. He leaves motivational messages at my desk to cheer me up. He is willing to listen to my problems and when we have disagreements, we talk it out. He gives me the freedom to have my own opinions and gives me sweet gifts without going overboard."

As Shu listened, he started to understand something. Suddenly, he groaned. "How was I so blind?"

"What?" asked Sora.

"Sorry. I just realized something," said Shu.

Shu had remembered how Rose had been incredibly patient with him while he had suffered from PTSD after what happened with Seina. She had offered to sacrifice their friendship for Shu's sake. She listened to his problems and helped him the best she can.

And Rose had told Shu that he could go with his crush to Prom when she thought he liked someone else. Sweet, caring, kind Rose. She tried her hardest to ensure that he was happy.

"I can't believe that Rose has liked me all this time and never said a word about it!" said Shu. "And I was either too crazy in love with Seina or too depressed to notice the clues. But why didn't she just tell me?"

"For the same reason you kept your feelings for her a secret," said Sora. "She was afraid of ruining your friendship."

Shu's mouth fell open. It made so much sense now. "Rose loves me," he said. "The same way Matt loves you."

Sora smiled at her little brother. "You're right. I shouldn't ruin my relationship with Matt over a silly worry. Matt loves me and I love him. And we are going to have the best wedding ever."

Shu ran to his room and looked through his drawers until he found it. A necklace with a gold chain and a heart shaped pendant. It was meant to be a gift for Seina, but that went out of the window after she started showing her true colours.

All these years Shu had kept the necklace in his drawers, not wanting to be reminded of his failed romance. But now, if he could get over his fears, he could make a fresh start with a girl who truly cared about him.

Matt and Sora were equal partners in their relationship. They respected each other's boundaries and talked through their problems.

Shu was determined never to let anyone put him down ever again. But there was one thing to do.

He had to confess his feelings to Rose without panicking.