Scorching

Ice Cold

Kaien

Once we got back I needed a walk. I made my way to the garden. I always come here to think, the koi fish remind me of my mom. She loved them, I even have a tattoo of some for her. She was born in Kyoto, and moved here for college where she met my dad. My mom had the answer to everything, she would know what to do about all this. My dad would react just like Lucas, wondering why I don't trust her. They're similar in that way, both of them have bleeding hearts. I appreciate Lucas' blind trust, but he needs to be more careful, especially with this hybrid situation. Hunter could be related to that, or Jack's death, or both. That house was a joke. Did she think I would fall for that? What the hell is she hiding? At least she's on my team, we'll spend enough time together for me to keep an eye on her. It's been a long day, I barely got any sleep last night on the damn cot. I should get to bed.

I'm making my way up the stairs, and I hear yelling. It's Maeve. Shit. Did Hunter do something, I shouldn't have left them alone up there, Elijah's team is on a mission, no one else is on the floor. I sprint up the last flight of stairs, turning the corner I see Hunter's door open. I run in, terrified of what I'll find, but it's not what I expected. Hunter is on the floor of her shower, Maeve hovering over her giving her CPR. "What the hell happened?!" I kneel down next to them. "I don't know, I heard her shower on for a really long time so I knocked to check on her and she didn't answer, the door was unlocked so I came in and found her passed out in the shower. I think she swallowed a lot of water, I don't know she's not breathing." Fuck. I grab a towel and throw it over Hunter, "Go call Jesse, and head for the nursery, meet him there in case he doesn't answer." I keep preforming CPR, it's probably been 30 seconds, but I feel like time is moving in slow motion. She finally coughs up a large amount of water, and she starts breathing. Thank God. She springs up, panicking, her breathing getting shorter and quicker. I pick her up off the ground. "Just breathe Hunter. Breathe. You're safe." I carry her to the bed, but it's not made. I set her gently on the floor. I take off my hoodie and put it on her. She hasn't made a sound. She doesn't even cry, but I can tell she was earlier. Her eyes are red and swollen. I make the bed and pick her up again, placing her under the covers. She remains silent. She looks defeated. What happened in that shower? She makes eye contact with me like she wants to say something, but can't. "Just sleep Hunter, it's okay Jesse will be here soon, I'm not going anywhere." She turns to face the wall. I sit on the floor with my back against her bed. I hear rustling for a few minutes, before she finally falls asleep. What a fucking day. What a fucking two days. What am I gonna do with her?

Jesse and Maeve rush in a few minutes later, and I quickly quiet them. "She's out, she was shaken up but I think she's okay. We should let her sleep Jess, I think she needs that more than anything." Jesse nods, "I'll stay with her in case anything happens." I don't want to leave but Jesse would do better in an emergency, and he can check on her right when she wakes up. I look at her one more time before I head out. "Come get me if something happens."

I head to my room, directly across the hall from Hunter's. I turn the shower on but I just stand there staring at the faucet. What happened in there. How can you drown in the shower? She wasn't bleeding and she didn't have any blunt trauma, so she didn't slip and hit her head. Did she have a panic attack? When I picked her up she looked so... defeated, didn't even utter a word to me. She was cold, like a dead body. I can still feel it on my fingertips. That icy feeling still plagues my own nightmares. I can't even help with the dead bodies on missions, luckily I have Maeve. I can look at them, but when I touch them, I freeze. I'm reminded of my parents' dead bodies. Why didn't I tense up with Hunter? Was it because I knew she was alive? Because I knew she needed help? I finally snap out of it and hop in the shower, but my hands remain cold. Part of me feels guilty for my doubts about her in the garden half an hour ago, but part of me thinks her episode tonight was her own guilt. I recognize that look, that look of guilt that's ever so slightly grazed her face a few times. She may have thought no one noticed but I did. I know that feeling all too well. What are you guilty about Hunter. What are you hiding that caused you so much stress you almost fucking drowned? Should I be scared of her, it seems like she's more scared than me, but of what? Is she scared we'll find her out, because she should be.

Hunter

I wake up freezing, my hair is a wet mop, and I'm in an unfamiliar sweatshirt. No. Not unfamiliar, this is Kaien's, he was wearing it last night. Last night. What the hell happened. I was in the shower and then I heard Maeve, but it sounded like she was far away, I couldn't see her. And I remember Kaien's face. I don't know how I got from the shower to my bed but I have a pretty good guess. Did I pass out again? I look over and see Jesse, asleep on a chair next to my bed. What time is it? I grab my phone, 5:26 AM. I get up to put some pants on, as quietly as I can. I don't want to wake him up, he was probably up all night to make sure I was okay. I put on some fuzzy socks to try and defrost my toes. I hate sleeping with wet hair. "Hey, you're up," Jesse smiles at me. "Sorry did I wake you up?" "No you're fine Hunter, I'm glad to be up I need to check on you. Sorry you had to find me in a chair pointing at your bed, I wanted to keep an eye on you after last night. Do you remember what happened?" "Yeah, I was taking a shower, and I was really stressed out. I just got so overwhelmed and I just felt like I couldn't breathe. I tried to turn the faucet off but I felt paralyzed, like I was reaching for it in slow motion. And then, I don't know I blacked out." "It sounds like you were having a panic attack, do you get those often?" Should I lie? I don't want them to be extra cautious of me. "Hunter you can trust me." I guess he can read minds. "Not often, but I don't really wanna talk about them anymore." "Okay, but I'm here if you ever do want to talk about them. And that's not information I need to disclose to the school, but I do need to let everyone know you're okay, can you come down to the infirmary and I'll check you out?" "Yeah, I can do that."

After Jesse checked me out and said I was fine I went to get some breakfast. I walk in and the only one there is Lucas. Great. He runs up to me, "Hunter!! I'm so glad you're okay, Kai told me what happened I was going to grab you some breakfast. Did you get checked out by Jesse?" "Yeah Jesse said I'm all good." "That's great, I was really worried. Let's get you something to eat." We sit down and eat breakfast and he tries to make small talk for a bit. I would try and pry about the hybrid situation some more but I feel drained right now, and I don't want to be talking to him at all. Last night I broke down, but I can't let that happen again. I can't lose my resolve. While Jesse was checking me out I was replaying last night in my head and I'm not sad anymore, I'm furious. It's all his fault that I had a panic attack. I wouldn't have panic attacks if my mom was alive and I had my family back. I wouldn't feel so paralyzed if I knew what happened to my mom and who did it. Why does everyone talk about how strong he is if it's been a decade and he can't figure out what the hell is happening? "Hunter?" "What? Sorry." He looks at me curiously. I must have zoned out. "I asked if you wanted to do some one-on-one training tomorrow?" "Oh, um, yeah sure." "Okay great, let's meet in the training building tomorrow at 8 AM. I'll see you later." Great.

I didn't feel like going back to my room yet so I went to the student lounge to make some tea. I sat on the balcony for a bit. I'm not really sure what to do with myself, I'm supposed to meet with the head of the school later but that's not until she's back from a meeting. I should go take a nap, I didn't get much rest last night.

I wake up to a knock on my door. "Hunter it's Maeve, can I come in?" "It's unlocked." "How are you feeling, we were all worried?" "I'm okay, really. I'm sorry you had to find me like that, I don't know what happened, I was having a panic attack and then—" Maeve wraps me up in a big hug. "It's okay Hunter. I'm just glad you're okay."Is this what it feels like to have a real friend? I want to hug her back but it feels weird, but a somehow I think she understands my feelings and lets me just be hugged. "I came to check up on you, but also to tell you Fox got back early, she's ready to see you."