Demise Game

12.names

A part of you felt like you would deserve it if everybody was upset with you and accused you of being the traitor.

        It was because of this that you felt overwhelmed and undeserving of their support.

        The moment you had walked into the club room, Hanami had launched herself at you, hugging you close and nearly sobbing into your hoodie.  Isora and Jinsei stood off to the side, but neither looked hostile.  While Jinsei looked jumpy, you could attribute that more to the game in general and not your appearance.  At least, that's what you thought.  You weren't a mind reader, or anything.

        Awkwardly hugging Hanami back, you admitted your worries about them accusing you of being the traitor.

        "It's not off the table," Isora admitted, and while the implication was severe, he didn't seem all too worried about it.  "But the fact is, you went to help her.  If you were the traitor, it would have been easier and safer for you to do nothing."

        "But...  She's still...  Gone."

        The atmosphere grew somber, and Hanami pulled back, lower lip trembling.  "Maybe if we all had tried to help...  It would have been different," she suggested quietly.

        You thought back to Shiki's words on how Kokkuri-san was actively trying to make it so you all would fail your respective games.  Would it have been different?  At the very least, it might have been easier to keep the doll from Natsume.

        Isora nodded.  "We talked about it yesterday, while you were in the hospital.  The next time one of us receives a letter, we're going to work together to pass the mission.  That way, we can also keep an eye on each other to stop the traitor from killing anybody off."

        It was a solid suggestion and plan, and you found yourself agreeing.  "I...  Think that's smart.  Yeah."

        Who would be the next person to receive Kokkuri-san's demands, though?  Only time would tell.  It wasn't something that any of you could predict.

        "More importantly, though..."  Jinsei finally spoke up, his voice more sure than how he looked.  "[Y/n], have you noticed anything... weird?"

        What an ambiguous question.  You had noticed plenty of things weird.  Really, he could be referencing anything!  Shiki, the police officers, your survival, the journal — well, considering they didn't know about the journal yet, it probably wasn't about the last thing.  But still.

        "You're...  Going to have to be a bit more specific than that," you admitted, face scrunched up as you went through every weird thing that had happened in that past few days.  Nothing about your life felt normal, anymore — everything going on right now could be considered 'weird'!

        Jinsei rubbed the back of his neck.  "Oh . . .  I meant, with A-me."

        A-me...  A-me...  "You mean, Na...  Oh."

        Once more, when you tried to say her name, it painfully got stuck in your throat.  It was suddenly as if you had swallowed glass shards, and you swallowed down the lump in your throat.  Earlier, when you had choked up in the hospital, you had assumed you were just struggling with what had happened.

        Why did your mom, then, refer to her as A-me and not her birth name?  Why had those police officers, knowing you were clubmates with her, still insisted on using her placeholder name and not her given one?

        "Why...  Can't we say her name?"

        "We don't know," Isora admitted.  "But it's the same with all of us.  Whenever we try to say her name, something stops us.  Same with trying to write or type it out."