When Summer Becomes Winter

Chapter 16: The Family's Shame

Summer 26

The outside air was getting cooler, and the leaves were beginning to detach from the branches as autumn approached with each passing second. I sat on one of the steps outside of the school, waiting for the afternoon class to begin.

Just a couple of days ago, Natalie confirmed that I was going to have a baby. It still felt surreal, and maybe it could be like a dream; Natalie did give me the choice of giving it up for adoption! Though I had plenty of time to think about that option, I was leaning towards the idea.

The bell rang as Roy, Cammy, and the twins bounded into the schoolyard. I could see my classmates walking towards the academy as I stood up from my seat, turning to go inside the building.

"Clara?" I heard someone ask as I turned around to Serena's concerned face.

"Oh. Hey, Serena. Is something up?" I asked as she blushed, wringing her hands.

"Uh, I'm just...concerned about you. Y-you seem a little down in the dumps." She said in a worried tone as I sighed, smiling slightly.

"Yeah, I'm going through some things right now." I said, looking down.

"Well, if you need anything, you can talk to me." She blurted; her eyes became wide as she started getting nervous.

"Uh, a-and Sera too!" She exclaimed, a blush creeping on her cheeks as I gave my head a nod.

"I will. Thanks Serena." I said she rushed off in a hurry, looking very flustered. It seemed as if Serena was being exceptionally nice to me; it made me wonder if maybe Leonel or Orland told her? Surely not though! Right?

I didn't give it any more thought as I rushed into the classroom. I didn't want Mr. Barrett to chew me if I was late. And since I'm in this situation with his son, he'll definitely be more pissed than my previous tardies from before the situation.

-

"Turn your Life-Side textbooks to page 410." Mr. Barrett ordered while taking a piece of chalk and scribbling something on the board. Leann cleared her throat loudly.

"Ah, Mr. Barrett?" My cousin began, "The Life-Side textbooks are for Ms. Mana's class." She furrowed her brow in confusion as Mr. Barrett placed the chalk down, turning around to face us.

"That may be so, Leann. But I need you kids to learn about this...just so you don't face any...consequences." He stated, continuing to write on the board.

"Oh..." I looked over my shoulder towards Orland, who was as red as a cherry as I quickly flipped the pages, blushing also.

The chapter was labeled 'Sex: The Pleasures and Risks'. I wanted to shut the book quickly and leave the classroom, but Leann would be suspicious if I left. I looked around the room and saw Leann and Leonel blushing a crimson red as well.

"This is going to be an awkward lesson, I know. However, I need you kids to know about the birds and the bees. And there is a reason for this as well." Mr. Barrett said as he began scribbling on the board again. I started melting in my seat in embarrassment; at least he didn't say the reason out loud.

After what seemed like a long lecture, Leann raised her hand; Mr. Barrett nodded towards her as she stood up, still red from embarrassment.

"Uh, M-Mr. Barrett, what was the reason for this lecture?" She asked as Mr. Barrett stroked his chin in a thinking manner as I felt my heart race. Was he going to spill my secret?

"I'm afraid I can't tell you the reason. But I'm sure you'll understand why soon." I noticed his eyes dart from Leonel to me and back again before resting his eyes on his papers.

"Class is dismissed early." He announced as we rose from our chairs, walking into the schoolyard with deep, crimson-red faces. My eyes glanced over at my cousin as I felt my heart pounding. I didn't want any of our other friends to know just yet, but Leann is family; she deserves to know, right?

Before she could take another step, I grabbed my cousin's upper arm, pulling her to the side of the school building.

"Clara! Ouch! You're hurting me! What is the meaning of this?" she demanded. I placed my index finger in front of my lips, indicating that she should lower her voice.

"I know why Mr. Barrett gave us that lecture." I told her, Leann blushed and leaned in closer

"What? How do you know?" she asked in a whisper, her eyes narrowed, and her brows furrowed in confusion as I blushed.

We're family! You can do this.

"I-I'll tell you how I know...but first, you have to promise not to tell anyone. Okay, Leann?" I whispered to her sternly. She held her breath and nodded, I hesitated for a few seconds.

"It-it's because...I...I'm going to have a baby with Leonel. All because I-I had to give him that stupid gift." I told her with difficulty. My eyes began to well up with tears as hers became wide with shock.

"Cl-Clar..." She began as I interrupted her.

"I-I don't know what I was thinking." I looked down; my tears started to stream down my cheeks.

"You told me that gift was a horrible idea. Th-that I could get hurt from giving it to him, but I didn't listen!" I started sobbing. It was horribly silent; she had to be disappointed in me, but instead of walking away and telling me that I was a shame to our family like she should have, she embraced me tightly.

"We're family, Clara. I'm here for you, no matter what." In addition to that, she gave me a kiss on the cheek before turning to leave for the manor, her high heels clicking further away from me. She stopped, looking back at me.

"If you need anything, Clara, don't hesitate to talk to me. I'm always going to be here for you." She said as I furrowed my brows.

"I-I don't...understand. Why are you...you seem to be okay about this?" I asked as she smiled slightly.

"Yes, I'm fine with it. I'm not sure how grandfather will be when you tell him, but I don't think he'll do anything too drastic." She replied, walking towards me again.

"So, why do you still care? I-I'm the family's shame now. I was kind of expecting you to-." Before I could finish what I was going to say, Leann cupped my face. I looked into her eyes as I noticed tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Because I love you, Clara! I'm not going to toss you aside for a small mistake such as this!" She embraced me as my eyes started to well up more tears.

"I'm assuming aunt Rosalind and uncle Jack already know about the situation?" She asked as I nodded.

"And they'll never toss you aside either! Our love for you is stronger than the de Sainte-Coquille reputation." I embraced my cousin back.

This was the first time I had ever felt safe around her. Most of the time I've felt vulnerable and judged. Because I've always tried too hard to meet others' expectations when Leann never had to try at all. I compare myself to her a lot because I feel as though everyone else loves her more. And maybe they do love Leann more, considering she meets everyone's expectations. I just wish I could make my family think fondly of me as well in a way.