Running (gxg)

Chapter Thirteen

"What am I doing here?" I repeated, taking a breath. "I'm here because... well, I want to know what I did wrong yesterday. You haven't replied to my message, and I keep wondering if I somehow overstepped. Did I do something wrong?" My voice softened as I looked at her, hoping for an answer.

Londyn looked caught off guard, her gaze flickering as she seemed to gather her thoughts. "Not here," she replied, her voice quiet, almost hesitant. "Please... come inside."

As I stepped into her office, I glanced around. The walls were lined with her degrees and awards, and on her desk, I noticed a photo of her with someone—an old friend, perhaps, or maybe more. Still, I couldn't dwell on that now. I took a seat on the small couch by her bookshelf, and after a moment's pause, Londyn joined me, though she sat at the far edge, keeping a noticeable distance.

"You didn't do anything wrong," she said finally, her voice steady but tinged with something I couldn't quite place. "It's just... I'm your professor, and you're my student. We shouldn't be getting this close, not like this."

I stayed silent, waiting to see if she'd say more.

"Last night," she continued, her eyes fixed on a point across the room, "I let myself get too close. I'm sorry for that. It was unprofessional, and it shouldn't have happened. I was genuinely concerned about you, that's all. I hope you can accept my apology, and that we can... leave this behind us." Her words sounded final, like a wall being carefully placed between us.

"Well, I'm sorry if I crossed a boundary, but I want you to know that I don't want to leave this behind. We can also just be friends, you know. We don't have to cut this off," I said, hoping she was okay with being friends. In the end, we didn't really do much, just hugged each other, which was really nice.

"Listen, I think it's better if we cut this off. Now that we have settled this, I wish you a good day," Londyn said.

Okay, WTF, she's just motioning me out of the office.

"OKAY... that's a bit mean to just finish this conversation like this," I raised my voice at first but noticed she got really afraid, so I tried to say it in a lower voice.

But I could see that Londyn wasn't here anymore; she had retreated into her mind. Did her ex scream at her or make her afraid?

Londyn began crying. "Hey... Hey, it's okay. I'm sorry for raising my voice. That wasn't my intention. I just got really emotional," I said, hoping she would look at me.

"Londyn, is it okay if I touch you?" I asked, hoping she could still respond.

Londyn just nodded. Most times, I would want a verbal answer, but at this moment, I just wanted her to be okay. I took Londyn's hand. She looked up. I think something changed because at that moment she rushed to me and started hugging me tightly, like a koala.

I held her close, feeling her body shake as she cried. Her vulnerability struck a chord in me, and I just wanted to comfort her in any way.

But the thought of "leaving it behind" made something ache inside me, a hollow sadness I couldn't shake. Last night hadn't been something I wanted to just brush off. It had felt real, meaningful. I took a deep breath, trying to find the right words, knowing I needed to tread carefully but also desperately wanting her to understand where I stood.

"Look," I began, steadying my voice, "I'm really sorry if I crossed a line for you. I didn't mean to. But... I don't want to pretend last night didn't happen. It meant something to me." I glanced at her, hoping to see a softening in her face, some sign that she might be willing to at least talk about it. "We don't have to end things, you know? We could just be friends if that's what you're comfortable with. I just don't want to lose you altogether."