Serpent scars

Chapter 3

I was woken up to the feeling of the morning breeze soaring across my naked skin. Roger was still snoring beside me. The first thing I wanted to do was change into some clothing. I hate being naked, especially around Roger. I decided on a short black dress with poofy sleeves, it had beautiful lacing around the bottom and top. The length was not ideal though, but it was a dress Roger had bought for me. Therefore I had to wear it at some point. I neatly folded my outfit for the day outside the downstairs bathrooms, I wasn't going to risk disturbing the peace by awakening Roger. My hands reached for the the tap that controlled the water temperature of the shower. I made it slightly colder than usual, normally I wanted to scrub off Roger's touch when showering, but I had since come to the conclusion it doesn't work.

I spend 20 minutes just massaging my scalp, rubbing the shampoo gently into my silky hair. I wonder how Vivian washes her hair? My instinct was to always use coconut shampoo, I like the smell of it, but I'm getting bored of it. Maybe I'll use the peach one. It's a weekend which means two days stuck with Roger, also know as, hell. My weekend would be spend walking on eggshells trying to cater for his needs. On Saturdays he expected a full English breakfast, so that's what I did. I reluctantly opened a pack of raw sausages from the butchers, raw meat freaks me out. I slipped four into the frying pan over the stove. Three for Roger and one for me. I should probably address my eating habits but that's a rabbit hole I'd rathe not fall down at the moment.

I was knocked out of my thoughts by the touch of someone's hands gripping my waist line. "Morning, princess." He said kissing me on the side of my head. I couldn't help but flinch at the touch, sometimes he likes it when I'm skittish and scared, this was one of those times. "Morning Roger." I replied trying to stay on task. My tone wasn't overly joyful, it was my usual monotone voice. "Someone's a bit grumpy I see. Tut tut tut." He muttered to himself, still being loud enough for me to hear. What is his problem. I have to refrain myself from going full on Rapunzel on him, he would easily overpower me. "Sorry, Roger." Shit. I should of called him baby. Too late now I guess. "Come sit down with me." He pleaded and I complied.

"No. On my lap silly." He said, his voice laced with anger but it was hard to perceive. I never felt comfortable sitting on his lap but I did it. I sat myself down on his knees like a little girl on Santa's lap at a mall. God this is embarrassing. He tucked my hair behind my ear and leaned his mouth in towards it. "Now listen here, Siobhan." He began to whisper. "This weekend can go two ways. You can listen, be good and do what I say, follow my rules, and this can go the good way. Or." He sat up and dragged me over to the stove with him by my hair. I was shaking and I couldn't help it. Someone help me. "You can not listen, don't follow the rules and see what happens." He continued his threat, still breathing words into my ear with his awful coffee breath. "Oops, Siobhan burnt herself!" He yelled dropping me and taking control of my arm, I was confused as I squinted my eyes giving him a glare of suspicion. Then I realised why he grabbed my arm. "WTF ROGER!" I screamed accidently. The burning sensation running through my blood. Luckily it was mainly shock and I was quick enough to withdraw my hand before I could cause any serious damage. He had dropped my fucking hand on the frying pan!

"Siobhan, watch it." He snapped before walking off and leaving me to deal with the injury. Right, um. I probably should disinfect it. I did so and it stung. God it stung so bad, the worst stinging pain I have ever felt. My secret medical supplies were stashed away in the bathroom cupboard above the sink along with my makeup bag. I used a bandage to wrap the wound in. It hurt like hell. Roger always made me ask for permission before I could take medication, he wanted to be the one to drug me up. And I don't care too much when he does, it feels good to escape from reality, even if it means I have no clue what's going on and the world is spinning. I brace myself before I go into his study. My feet carry my unwilling mind inside. He's sat there at his desk sorting through files on a laptop. He has his glasses on so this must be serious. Maybe I should turn back, yeah. But just as I go to exit I hear him call my name. "Siobhan, I know you're there." He speaks in his usual monotone voice too. I guess it made us the perfect coupe, matched in heaven...

I take a step backwards from the door to see his focus still aimed on his work. "Sorry to bother you Roger, but um, I was wondering if I could take some painkillers. My hand is killing me." I explain in a child like voice. His chair then spins round and my eyes meet Roger's. "Oh my god Siobhan! You're not a child, just take the god dam medication. You're so needy, what kind of mother are you going to be if you can't look after yourself. Useless woman!" He muttered the last part to himself but I could still hear it. Maybe he was right, I am going to be a terrible mother and I'm a useless woman. The thought of being a mother still rocks me to my core. I try not to think about it, it hasn't hit me yet. It hasn't hit me that I will soon be in charge of another human being's safety as well as mine. What if he hurts the baby, surely he wouldn't got that far, right? I'm probably overthinking this, I'm not even sure if I'm pregnant yet.

I left the office letting Roger continue his work. The painkillers were stored in the kitchen cupboard adjacent to the fridge along with many other unnamed medication. Normally I'm forbidden from this section. I'm pretty sure Roger is part of the drug trade. But as he always says, 'I shouldn't worry my pretty little head about it'. There were many zip lock bags, some with white powders and others containing pills, some even had liquid in it. The bags were labelled in code with cryptic numbers and letters.  I started to freak out when I saw needles to inject the drugs so I grabbed the painkillers as soon as possible. I recognised the pills so I knew the dosage, this was good at least.

After around ten minutes I started to feel the affect of the the drugs, it felt good, really good. If Roger really was going to be in his study all day I could have a lazy day. I rested my legs on the ottoman and rested my body on the sofa. It wasn't particularly comfy, Roger had the whole place professionally decorated meaning it was more for looks. I started to think about names for my child, would it be a boy or a girl. Would I even carry it full term? What would it's nursery be like? Where would it's toys go? I know most people don't refer to children as an it, but I am not most people. Wait! That's where I recognised the woman from. Vivian was the parent who was late one time because she's a nurse. She had made a comment about how most people wouldn't call a child an it. I guess that day was almost a blur for me, it didn't end well once I was late home because of her.

I wanted to watch a movie to take my mind off things, back when I was little I was a sucker for a Disney film. Now days I love a rom-com. That's my little secret. But before I could turn on Netflix, I heard heavy footsteps coming from the study. "Siobhan! You can't just sit around all day. Make yourself useful, otherwise there's no point keeping you around!" "Sorry Roger." I apologised feeling embarrassed. What was I thinking? The rest of the day passed slowly and was spent doing chores around the house. What fun.