The quiet of the dorm room pressed down like a heavy weight. Katsuki Bakugo laid awake, his eyes fixated on the ceiling, mind racing in the dark.It was past his 8:00 bedtime... very passed it. It was the early hours of the morning, the rest of UA's Class 1-A wrapped in a peaceful sleep- something that eluded him tonight.
Memories he wished he could erase gripped him since being saved from the League of Villains- he would never admit he was saved though. He could feel the cold, slimy grip of the sludge villain wrapping around him- suffocating him. He hated tight spaces because of it. He remembered being unable to breathe, thrashing around and panicking, all the confidence and extensive power being stripped away so easily. His chest tightened, recalling how muffled his screams were being choked out by the slime. The sensation of him nearly dying had been so visceral, so terrifying, that it lingered even now.
Unfortunately, that wasn't the only memory that had come clawing at him.
He shifted relentlessly in bed, trying and failing to find a position for him to finally get needed rest. But the next wave of memories was inevitable. Not even a week ago- the day he got taken by the League. He'd been restrained, unable to fight back. Where did all his power go? The villains had looked at him with an eagerness that he couldn't understand. Why did people think he would turn to be a villain when all he wanted to do was be the number one hero? They thought he could be one of them. The memory filled him with a sickening mix of anger and shame.
He clenched his fist under the covers, teeth gritting. He hated how powerless he had been, he hated that all his strength was utterly useless. They had taken him because they knew it would shake All Might- make him vulnerable. And in the end, it had worked.
"All Might..." He whispered to the dark, empty room, the name leaving a bitter taste in his mouth knowing that it was he who destroyed the Symbol of Peace.
A quiet knock at his door startled him from his thoughts. He wasn't expecting anyone, especially not at this hour when everyone was supposed to be asleep. He considered ignoring it but then he heard your voice- soft, and cautious.
"Bakugo? It's me... Y/n L/n. I thought I'd check on you since you've been out of it since you got back."
You weren't close with him in the slightest, you didn't even thinks he'd open the door for you, but he closed his eyes, considering sending you away but instead... reluctantly, he dragged himself out of bed and opened the door.
You looked at him, a mix of concern and something he couldn't quite place, "You okay?" You ask gently.
"Couldn't sleep, the fuck you here for extra?" He avoided your gaze, the aggression in his voice non existent deposits the words used.
"I just had a feeling..." You offered him a warm smile, "Can I come in?"
He hesitated, no one had actually seen his room properly, he refused to let people inside but finally... he stepped to the side letting you in. You settled on the edge of his bed, and he followed, crossing his arms over his chest defensively. Silence stretched between you, a wall that he was unwilling to break.
Eventually you spoke, "You've been different lately, quieter." You paused, "Is it.. because of All Might?" You liked to analyse people to get a greater understanding of them and you joined on the mission to get him to safety, away from the lengths of the League.
The question made his chest constrict. He kept his face turned away, refusing to show any signs of weakness.
Yet for some unknown reason, he felt he could trust in you- confide in you.
You weren't loud and expressive like the rest of your classmates were, you were very kept to yourself. You were friends with everyone, but you didn't go out of your way to be loud about it. You were on the higher side of strength in the class but you didn't flaunt your power or attract any unnecessary power to you.
"It's not just that.." he muttered, "You wouldn't get it." His voice was rough but quiet, he didn't want to damage his pride.
"Try me." You replied, your tone steady and patient.
He glanced at you, and for a second, something broke through his carefully constructed defenses. Maybe it was the exhaustion, maybe it was the weight of everything he had been carrying for too long. But he took a shaky breath, the words slipping out before he could stop them.
"It's all of it dumbass," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, "That sludge villain... and the shitty League... they both had me. They both used me like... like I was some weak little kid." His fists were clenched, his nails digging into his palms, "And both times, All Might had to come and save me."
You watched him carefully, not interrupting, just listening to what he has to say as he struggled to voice what had haunted him for so long.
"All Might lost his power because of me." He continued, bitterness lacing his tone, "He pushed himself to the brink because he thought I was worth it. But... I wasn't. I wasn't worth it... and now he's left with nothing! I destroyed the Symbol of Peace."
The guilt festered inside him ever since that day, a constant, unrelenting reminder that his weakness had cost All Might everything. He was supposed to be strong, supposed to be powerful enough to protect himself and everyone else. But every time he closed his eyes, he saw All Mights frail body, the light of his power fading forever.
You reached out, placing a hand on his. He tensed but he didn't pull away.
"You know that's not true Bakugo," you said softly, "All Might didn't see you as weak, he saw you as someone worth saving, someone with potential to become a hero just like him."
He shook his head, "All I did was hold him back. If I had been stronger... if I'd been better, he wouldn't have had to loose his power. He'd still be able to fight, he'd still be able to protect and save everyone, be our Symbol of Peace. But he can't. And I... I just get to keep going like nothing happened, like I didn't ruin everything."
The raw emotion in his voice took you be surprise. You'd always known Bakugo to be someone who hid his insecurities behind his anger and bravado, but here he was, baring his soul in front of you.
"Bakugo..." you gently said, "Being a hero isn't about never needing help. It's about doing everything you can to protect others, even if it means sacrificing yourself. That's what All Might did for you, because he believed in you."
For a long time, he didn't respond. The air was filled with the quiet hum of the night, a stillness that seemed to settle over the both of you. Finally, he looked up at you, his gaze filled with a mixture of anger, shame and something that almost looked like hope.
"What if I don't deserve it?" He whispered, his voice barely audible, laced with trauma, "What if I never live up to it?"
You gripped his hand and gave it a tight, reassuring squeeze, "You will. You know how I know that? 'Cause your Lord Explosion Murder God Dynamight, and you give no shits about what anyone says. If you're not anyone else's hero, Bakugo, then you'll be mine. I believe in you."
In the dark, you could barely see it but... a light shade of pink dusted over his cheeks and he turned his head, "Thanks." He muttered, but there had been a warmth in his voice that hadn't been there before.
"If you need anything, let me know Bakugo." You let go of his hand and walked to the door, gently opening it and closing it.
To your surprise, Denki Kaminari had just went to get a late night snack and was on his way back to his room as he saw you exit Bakugo's room.
'Shit.' You thought as you walked directly past him with a deep blush forming on your face.
YOU ARE READING
COMFORT || K.BAKUGOU X READER
FanfictionAs Bakugo grapples with his insecurities, Y/n becomes a source of comfort, helping him confront his vulnerabilities.