A Distraction // Bangchan

Chapter Thirty-Seven

It was late when Chan finally returned to the dorms, the exhaustion of a long day at the studio weighing heavily on his shoulders. He had thrown himself into work ever since the breakup, using the late nights and endless projects to keep his mind off everything else. The studio had become his escape, the only place where the ache in his chest didn't feel so suffocating.

But tonight, even the comfort of music hadn't been enough to drown out the thoughts of Lauren that refused to leave his mind. No matter how hard he tried to focus on producing, her face kept flashing before him—the memory of her laughter, her smile, the warmth of her presence. It all felt like a distant dream now, and it made his heart feel heavier with every passing day.

As he stepped into the dorm, the quiet was almost startling. Usually, at this hour, Felix or one of the other guys would still be awake, watching something on TV or messing around with music, but tonight, the living room was dimly lit, and there was an unusual stillness in the air.

Chan kicked off his shoes and tossed his bag by the door before glancing around. His eyes landed on the couch, where Felix was sprawled out, clearly fast asleep. Chan blinked, confused for a moment. Felix almost never slept on the couch unless he was really drunk—he always complained about how uncomfortable it was compared to his bed.

Chan furrowed his brows, approaching the couch quietly. He stood over Felix for a moment, wondering why his friend was here instead of in his room. It was weird.

"Felix?" Chan called softly, not wanting to startle him. Felix shifted but didn't wake up, his breathing deep and even, clearly in a deep sleep.

Chan scratched the back of his head, his confusion only growing. Something felt off. He almost never crashed here, and if he did, it was usually because someone else had taken over his room—like when one of the other members needed space or if a friend stayed over.

It was then that a thought struck him, and his heart dropped into his stomach. Could it be...? No. It couldn't be her.

A flicker of hope—and panic—shot through him as he stood there, frozen, his mind racing. What if Lauren was here? What if Felix had picked her up and brought her back to the dorm? The idea made Chan's chest tighten with both excitement and dread. He missed her so much, but at the same time, the last thing he wanted was to face her right now. Not when he was still struggling to keep himself together.

He glanced toward Felix's bedroom door, which was shut. His heart raced, his mind spinning with the possibility that Lauren could be behind that door, asleep, maybe just as heartbroken as he was. The thought sent a rush of emotion through him, but he didn't know what to do with it.

Should he knock? Should he leave it alone? Should he pretend he didn't know she was there, if she was?

Chan took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down. He couldn't assume anything. Maybe Felix had just wanted to crash on the couch for no particular reason. Maybe he was overthinking it. But the idea that Lauren might be in the dorm, just a few feet away, made it impossible for him to think straight.

He stood there for a few more moments, staring at the closed door, his heart pounding in his chest. Every fiber of his being wanted to see her, to talk to her, to hold her. But the reality of their situation—the label, the pressure, the fallout from their breakup—kept him rooted in place.

Finally, he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face as he tried to shake off the overwhelming emotions. He couldn't do this right now. He couldn't let himself get pulled back into the pain, not when he had barely managed to hold himself together in the first place.

With one last glance at Felix's room, Chan turned away, heading toward his own room. His heart still ached with the thought of her, but for now, all he could do was try to get some rest, even if sleep felt impossible.