Thick As Blood {A Menendez Brothers Fic}

26. Getting To Know You (Memory Chapter)

I frantically rummaged through my closet for what I could only hope would be the perfect outfit for today's outing with Erik, our first official one since becoming friends. Both of our fathers were consumed with work for the remainder of the day, granting us the perfect opportunity to officially get to know one another better outside of our families watchful eyes.

"Sissy....? Is everything okay?" Clothes littered my bed from the many choices I had made, then decided weren't good enough for the occasion. The only reason I'm being like this, is because I never, and I repeat, never, am allowed to be alone with a boy. And I wouldn't be this time as well if my dad was home. He would throw a fit if he knew what I was doing today. But, he didn't need to know every single detail of my life.

"Everything is fine, peanut. I'm just trying to decide what to wear. I'm hanging out with Erik today." Ava gleefully smiled from my words, the sound of his name enough to earn that smile. She absolutely adores Erik and Lyle, more than anyone we'd ever been able to remotely know. Only being five, her maturity is the result of a rather difficult childhood experience. I to have always been the same way. Because I had no other choice. I never do.

"Erik likes you, sissy. I can tell. But, so does Lyle." I couldn't contain my laughter from her confused expression from the notion of how Erik and Lyle view me. She's too young to know the dynamics of liking someone in that manner, and what it could lead to. I wasn't explaining that to her until she's at least a teenager.

"And I like them. They actually...... care about us." Something we both aren't used to. Sure, we have our Aunt Clara who lives in Florida who we had to leave behind, something my father reminds me of every single day it would seem. Because it's all my fault, he'd say.

"But I think Erik loooooves you! But, what if Lyle loves you also....?" Her many questions was enough to confuse anyone, sitting her down on the edge of my bed so we could talk it over before Erik arrived in a matter of minutes. And I still had yet to get dressed, or do my makeup and hair.

"Sweetheart, matters of the heart aren't even near being a worry for you. Okay? Loving someone..... is special. You can love someone as a friend, a family member, or as in your soulmate. Someone you're meant to be with. We just met Erik and Lyle. And where I do already care about them so incredibly much— I want to take my time." But, I knew at that moment, I was already head over heels for Erik. My every waking moment was littered with thoughts of him.

"So you love them both?" I gently smiled at her, before taking her into my arms in a soft hug, feeling her little arms wrap around me.

"Of course I do."
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(20 Minutes Later)
"I'm so sorry it took me longer than expected, Erik. I had a very curious little munchkin come into my room asking fifty million questions that I wasn't prepared for." He grinned at me from knowing it was Ava, thankful my dad wasn't home since he had been waiting for me down in the den. Helen graciously answered the door upon his arrival, allowing me to yell down the stairs that I was almost ready.

"Do I dare ask what?" I softly chuckled from his curious eyes on me, our hands nearly grazing one another from our close proximity.

"Matters of the heart, actually. She's curious how I feel about you. And Lyle of course." Wide eyed and rather shocked by a mere five year old asking such grown up questions, I had grown accustomed to the notion that she was mature because of life's challenges.

"What was your answer?" Bashful as could be, my cheeks I knew had to be turning red from how I truly was feeling. Erik and I had been speaking on the phone when our parents aren't home, gazing upon one another from our prospective houses when he's out playing tennis, even having lunch together during school hours. And unbeknownst to even myself for a while, I was extremely smitten.

"That I do indeed, care about both of you. And I—I do love you and Lyle already. Erik—spending time with you, even if we're sneaking phone calls in the dead of night, is some of the best moments I've ever had." Little by little, I was falling for him. I knew it's not something I should do, considering both our parents would do something terrible to stop it. But, I couldn't help myself. Being with him, made me feel alive. More alive than I've ever felt before.

"You have no idea what spending time with you means to me, Ana. Even hearing your voice after a long day and night at home, makes it all—better." I didn't know exactly what Erik's home life was like yet, only some glimpses of how his father can be. And it's not very pleasant. I just knew that what we had, helped us both.

"Like—like I can actually breathe and be happy. Genuinely happy." We gazed upon one another for what felt like an endless amount of time, his soft, blue eyes the most comforting thing I've ever looked into. He's the kindest soul I've ever known.
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Laughter littered the duration of our day, goofing off together at different shops in 90210, stopping at a little cafe we happened upon while walking down close to where we had parked Erik's car. Ordering a hazelnut flavored coffee, Erik ordering a juice that was meant to be on the healthier side, we took a seat just outside in the patio area, away from all the many people littering the inside.

"I don't usually go shopping, simply because my dad watches everything I do on the card reports. But, this has been amazing. I needed new school outfits anyway." Erik softly laughed from my little humored smile from my words, taking a sip of my coffee to soothe my soul, as it always does. My mom had given me my very own black card to use that had no limit. But, I definitely was made to have one by my father. I wasn't a crazy spender or anything. And he always watches over what I bought, going through any bags I would bring home to see what I did indeed buy.

"Lyle and I don't typically buy anything we like. It's more about what our dad prefers for us to have." That, I could believe. I could sense they don't get to do much for themselves. But more for him. I felt their pain. Just not the extent of it.

"I'm beginning to think our dads have some vendetta against their own spawn. Like, we did something so horrible by merely being born." I brushed it off, but it always wracked my mind. Sometimes I didn't think I was meant to be born. Or Ava. Ava is more like my child than theirs. If she had it her way, I would be her mom.

"You have no idea.... But anyway. Let's not let our parents control our day." I softly smiled at him, more than happy to not think of them in the least. So we merely spent the next few minutes in deep conversation about anything and everything we could possibly think of. Writing, school, tennis, family beyond our parents, even mentioning how great our siblings are.

"You know something Erik? I really do like you." I said almost so nonchalantly, trying to act as if I wasn't scared of what he'd say. Erik is such a massive catch. He's so sweet, kind, smart, caring, funny and thoughtful. Very athletic, attractive. He's the entire amazing package. He could have anyone. But yet, he's here with me.

"I really like you to, Ana. You're such a breath of fresh air. I'm never allowed to have a relationship with hardly anyone. But— but I'm glad you're here." My eyes began to well with tears I've held back for many years, the notion of someone actually wanting me around, not something I'm used to. I knew Erik felt the same. And that's why this is so special. Our beautiful friendship was developing. And it would only continue to flourish from here.