Becoming Broken

Chapter Three

A month has passed by, and I’m more depressed than ever. I went from being at a small school with thirty kids in my grade, to now being at a school where there’s thirty kids in my English class! We’ve been in school two weeks now, and I have zero friends. I miss New York and hate this city. It’s so built up and the only nature you find is at city parks, and even that feels fake with the screaming kids and pill popping parents standing around. I want to go home.

When at Grandma’s house, things aren’t too terrible. She has a five-bedroom house, so we each have our own rooms. Ashley and I share a bathroom that’s connected to our bedrooms, and I can’t tell you how many nights we’ve crossed paths and cried together in there about everything we’ve recently lost. Our parents, our homes, our friends.

Another loss I experienced was the loss of my first boyfriend. He was there for me at first but after a week of being in Michigan, we both decided the long-distance thing was too hard and we broke up. We agreed to remain friends, but the texts between us have become less and less. I’m losing touch with the people I’ve been friends with for at least ten years and I feel like I have lost myself in the process.

David seems to be adjusting well. He still cries sometimes about losing Mom and Dad, but he’s made new friends and is starting his new life. He’s only seven, so it’s easier for him to make friends and adjust. I’m happy that he’s had an easy transition. Ashley struggles, but she’s made a friend or two at her school. Here we are all at different schools in different places, when in New York we were all on the same campus. I miss David running up to me and hugging me when we crossed paths, or Ashley and I gossiping on the bus about the latest drama.

The bell rang so I shoved my binder into my bag, got up and slumped out of class. Even though we live three and a half miles from campus, I choose to walk instead of getting on that overcrowded bus. I rode it for the first three days and hated it every time, so I used my GPS and started walking. Grandma will drive me in the morning, but I end up walking home in the afternoon. Grandma works part time at a bookstore, so she isn’t always able to pick me up. Even though we live in a bad town, I have Dad’s ring and know he’s looking after me while I walk.

With me walking home, Ashley and I end up getting home around the same time. She got off the bus and when she saw me walking up the street, she stood there and waited for me. She was smiling, so I take it she had a good day. I’m glad she’s slowly adjusting to being here. I never will.

“Hey Em!” She greeted.

“Hey.” I replied with a dull tone.

“How was your day?”

“Dragged on like usual. Glad it’s Friday so I can hide in my room all weekend.”

Ashley threw her arms around me. “We can’t stay depressed forever, sis. Mom and Dad wouldn’t want that.”

I nodded and walked up to the door. I unlocked it and we went inside. We both put our backpacks in our room. Grandma put David in an after-school program at the elementary school, so he doesn’t have to be home alone and she picks him up on her way home. I laid on my bed and a minute later, Ashley popped her head in my door.

“Guess what?” She asked.

“What?”

“I got my first boyfriend!”

For the first time since the accident, I felt excited. “Really? What’s his name? Is he cute?”

She came barreling into my room and jumped on my bed with me. I screamed as she caused me to bounce in the air for five seconds, then sat up so we could talk.

“Duh he’s cute. Look!”

She held up her phone and showed me a selfie he must have sent her. He has blonde hair, light blue eyes and big lips. I smiled and nodded.