The first to last feels

Why What and not How

Things were going so fine
Atleast it felt so
I was happy so happy with what I had
That WHAT was you
I always knew WHAT you were to me
WHAT was US
WHAT we are
WHAT we can be
WHAT I wanted to give you
WHAT a pure soul like yours deserved to receive
WHAT you gave me
WHAT you taught me
Always knew this WHAT WHAT WHAT

Why couldn't I think of HOW
Why did I feel everything will fall in it's own space at correct time
EVERYTHING HAS ITS OWN TIMING
as you told me so
Maybe I just didnt know HOW to actually make it work
HOW to show you what I actually meant by YOURE VERY IMPORTANT TO ME
HOW to show you what I actually meant by
I LOVE YOU

I repent regret remorse my words my actions
Which I made in the shell of my immaturity
In the shell of your affection love and safety you built for me
Why couldn't I be better when you were there with me
Why couldn't this HOW strike me then

They say you know the real value of something when you actually are on the verge of loosing it
But you were always INVALUABLE IRREPLACEABLE for me
But they were right you
You were the BEST FOR ME
You were MY GIRL only mine

Why did I always feel you were for me
Why did I forget that you have needs and wants too just like I do
You were a human too
HOW COULD I BE SO SELFISH

I can't take back what's already done in the past
Making you hopeless without actually understanding what you are

You said you had an intuition this won't work
I hope I pray I wish I really do
For maybe the very first and last time you read it wrong
Maybe that intuition was telling you to start US again with new energy new phase and new ME

I am learning this HOW
I wish this struck me earlier
That only WHAT was not enough
We ... I needed this HOW

I hope you decide to give me this chance to actually treat you the way you I always wanted to because I always knew the WHAT
WHAT YOU MEANT FOR ME
Please give me this LAST CHANCE
ILL NOT LET YOU DOWN