Can't you just text me before you come over like any normal person?

Part 4

It had been raining for days now. Missy had been caught in yet another heavy downpour on her way home from work this evening and was soaked through.

What she really wanted now was a nice hot shower before curling up and watching a movie or a bit of tv.

Slowly stripping out of her wet clothes, she ambled into her bathroom turning on the shower.

She unpinned her hair, letting her damp caramel locks flow down her back and removed her underwear, tossing it haphazardly into her laundry basket before stepping under the warm water.

She pulled the shower curtain closed behind her before letting out a pleasurable gasp as the warmth spread over her skin. She ran her hands through her hair, holding her face under the water and closed her eyes, letting her head fall back.

She stuck her arm out of the curtain reaching for the shampoo she had bought only the day before. As her hand finally grasped the large bottle she was met with a familiar-

"You're welcome."

Missy's eyes snapped open. She instantly tugged back the curtain slightly, to be met with the sight of Wade Wilson sitting on top of her toilet, holding the bottle of shampoo out towards her.

"What the fuck are you doing in my bathroom, Wade?" she screamed, tugging the shower curtain around herself.

"Just wanted to know if you needed me to scrub your back?" he said gesturing with the bottle. "I can do amazing things with a loofah y'know?"

Missy tutted before snatching the bottle from his grasp and disappearing back out of his line of sight.

"I'm getting that key back from you..." she threatened as she poured a handful of shampoo into her palm and rubbed it onto her scalp.

She could hear him moving around inside the tiny bathroom. She closed her eyes once more as the water poured down her face..

"So..... gone on any more dates lately?" Missy heard Wade ask.

Her stomach dropped instantly, just thinking about how her last one had gone.

She paused for a moment. "Not since the last one."

She heard a loud clatter which sounded like the entire contents of her bathroom cabinet falling out into the sink below.

"You still haven't told me what happened that was so bad," he called through to her. "I thought I was supposed to be your fucking BFF!"

"Like I told you before, I don't want to talk about it, okay," she murmured quietly, as she ran her fingers through her long hair.

She could hear Wade clattering about again.

"I'll take you on a date," he said after a moment.

Missy who was reaching for the conditioner, paused. She smirked to herself.

"Oh yeah?" she uttered humouring him. "Where would you take me on our make-believe date Wade?"

"Hmmmm," replied Wade, as Missy poked her head around the curtain, spotting him once again sitting on top of the toilet. "Probably wherever that dickwad took you, but I'd make sure it ended better....."

"Oh yeah?" said Missy with a laugh, disappearing behind the shower curtain once more.

"Yuh-huh," he uttered. "And then I'd make sure you were flat on your back screaming my fucking name by the end of the night. 'Waaade oh, oh...WAAAAAADE!"

"Right..." she murmured, rolling her eyes.

"Or you can be on top. I'm pretty easy," he said, as suddenly his masked head appeared around the curtain.

"Wade!" she yelled, covering herself with one hand and reaching forward and shielding his white eyes with the other.

"Yeah screaming it just like that, but with the added bonus of an orgasm," he replied, as she shoved him out.

"Just hand me a towel," she said irritably, and in a second a white fluffy towel appeared around the curtain.

Switching off the shower she carefully wrapped her slender form in the towel and stepped out.

"There are you happy now?" she said shooting Wade a cross look. "I can't even have a moments peace to myself with you around-"

But before she could say anything else, Wade had leapt past her and jumped into the shower, pulling the curtain across behind him.

"What the-" said Missy, spinning around to hear the sound of a zip being undone.

Suddenly an entire red and black leather suit complete with boots, guns and mask came flying out, landing a few feet away. Followed finally by a pair of Hello Kitty boxers.

"Hello Kitty?" Missy asked raising an eyebrow.

"Great aren't they, I had those custom-made," he said in a happy tone.

"Yeah, lovely," said Missy, rolling her eyes, as she heard the shower being switched on

"Blind Al used up all the hot water," explained Wade, over the sound of running water. "But I knew I could count on my BFILTF to finish up her shower early to save me some hot water at her place. BFILTF, if you were wondering, stands for 'Best. Friend. I'd. Like. To. Fuck'. I saw enough in this shower earlier to definitely confirm that. "

Missy frowned and gave a huff.

"Ugh, you're the worst," she said with a shake of her head.

"What?" he yelled innocently. "I only saw a nipple...OK, maybe two..."

Missy growled and turned on her heel. "You've got five minutes!" she shouted back to him as she stormed out of the bathroom. "Otherwise your kinky leather S&M suit is going in the fucking dumpster, Wilson!"

"If you think my outfit's kinky, I'm obviously doing something right!" he yelled, back happily, before breaking into a loud off-key rendition of Careless Whisper.