Sasha lay in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling as her phone's screen glowed softly in the darkness. The faint hum of the air conditioner and the distant chirping of crickets outside created a soothing melody, but her mind refused to calm. Another lonely night, another failed attempt at studying for her psychology exam.
Her gaze drifted to the clock on her nightstand: 11:47 PM. The digits seemed to mock her, reminding her of the looming deadline. Sasha's thoughts swirled with self-doubt and anxiety:
"What if I fail?"
"What if they laugh?"
"What if I'm not worthy?"
She tossed her phone aside, the screen dimming as it hit the mattress. The silence enveloped her like a shroud, emphasizing her isolation. Sasha's eyes wandered to the scribbled note on her dresser: "I am enough." She chuckled mirthlessly. Who was she kidding?
As she lay there, Sasha's mind began to craft a familiar scenario - one where she was loved, cherished, and enough. She imagined strong arms enveloping her in a warm embrace, a gentle voice whispering sweet nothings in her ear. The fantasy was a comforting escape, but the face remained a blur, a constant reminder that this was just a fantasy.
Sasha's thoughts drifted back to reality, and she threw off the covers. The cool air conditioned air caressed her skin, but she felt suffocated. She padded across the room, opening the window to let in the night breeze. The scent of blooming flowers and fresh-cut grass wafted in, momentarily calming her nerves.
As she stood there, lost in thought, Sasha's gaze fell upon her reflection in the windowpane. Her eyes, usually bright and inquisitive, seemed dull and lifeless. Her long, dark hair cascaded down her back like a waterfall of night, framing a face that seemed... invisible.
Sasha's gaze lingered on her reflection, tracing the contours of her face. The soft moonlight highlighted the faint freckles on her cheeks and the gentle curve of her nose. But she didn't see her own beauty. Instead, she saw a stranger - a girl with a fragile smile and eyes that seemed to hold a thousand unspoken words.
Her thoughts swirled like a maelstrom:
"What's wrong with me?"
"Why can't I be enough?"
"Why do I feel so invisible?"
The questions echoed through her mind, each one a razor-sharp reminder of her inadequacy. Sasha's shoulders slumped, her posture faltering under the weight of her self-doubt.
As she turned away from the window, her gaze caught on a photograph tacked to the bulletin board. A picture of her and Emily, taken on a spontaneous road trip last semester. Sasha's smile in the photo seemed carefree, joyful. But now, it felt like a cruel mockery.
Sasha's thoughts drifted to Emily, her roommate and confidante. Emily, with her sun-kissed hair and bright smile, seemed to embody everything Sasha wasn't: confident, outgoing, loved.
A pang of envy stabbed at Sasha's heart. Why couldn't she be more like Emily? Why couldn't she be enough?
The self-criticism stung, and Sasha's eyes began to well up with tears. She felt like she was drowning in her own insecurities.
Sasha's tears fell like autumn rain, each drop a reminder of her fragility. She felt like she was shattering, piece by piece, and couldn't stop the collapse.
As she wept, Sasha's mind crafted a cruel narrative:
"You're not lovable."
"You're not desirable."
"You're not worthy."
The words seared her soul, branding her with shame. Sasha's body shook, convulsing with sobs.
Suddenly, her phone buzzed on the nightstand. Emily's name flashed on the screen.
"Hey, Sasha! Want to grab coffee tomorrow? I'm coming straight from my parents"
Sasha hesitated, unsure how to respond. Part of her longed for Emily's warmth and understanding, but another part feared being a burden.
"Hey, Em. I'm not sure," Sasha typed, hesitating.
"Everything okay?" Emily replied.
Sasha's fingers hovered over the keyboard, unsure how to articulate her turmoil.
"Yeah, just stressed," Sasha lied.
"Okay, roomie. if you need you, don't worry I'll come soon." Emily wrote.
Sasha smiled weakly, feeling grateful for Emily's unwavering support.
Sasha's gaze lingered on the empty space beside her, where Emily's presence usually brought warmth. Her roommate was spending the weekend at her parents' house, a few hours away.
As Sasha lay in bed, her thoughts swirled like a vortex:
"Why can't I be strong like Emily?"
"Why do I always feel so broken?"
"What's wrong with me?"
The questions taunted her, echoing off the walls of her mind. Sasha's chest constricted, her breathing shallow.
She padded across the room, seeking solace in the darkness. The window beckoned, a rectangle of moonlit calm.
Sasha stood before it, feeling the cool glass against her forehead. The world outside seemed peaceful, oblivious to her turmoil.
As she gazed out, Sasha's thoughts drifted to her childhood. Memories long buried began to resurface:
Her parents' arguments, the shouting and tears.
The loneliness of her adolescence, feeling invisible.
The crushing weight of expectation, never being enough.
The recollections stung, reopening old wounds.
Sasha's eyes fell shut, her body trembling. She felt like she was unraveling, thread by thread.
Suddenly, her phone buzzed on the nightstand. Emily's name flashed on the screen.
"Hey, Just checking in. How's your night? btw"
"It's been better," Sasha typed, hesitating. "Just feeling lost, I guess."
"I'm here for you, sweetie," Emily replied. "Even if I'm not there in person. What's going on?"
"I'll let you know once you are here" Sasha replied and turned off her phone.
YOU ARE READING
The Invisible Girl
Short Storya short story about: "A poignant exploration of self-doubt, toxic relationships, and the power of forgiveness. Join Sasha on her transformative journey as she breaks free from self-doubt, overcomes toxic friendships, and discovers her inner strength...
