Everything To Lose | Jiara

The Albatross Aftermath

JJ's feet felt heavy as he trudged up the dock, each step dragging him further into a reality he wasn't ready to face. The sound of the water lapping against the posts was drowned out by the storm raging inside his head. His conversation with Luke had been short, but it was enough to unravel everything he thought he knew about his life.

"I ain't your father, JJ. At least not by blood."

He could still see the way Luke had looked at him, a mixture of exhaustion and sympathy in his eyes, as though saying the words brought him some twisted relief. After that moment, JJ had bolted away from Luke, not even waiting for more explanation, his heart pounding in his chest.

Now, as he walked back from the dock toward the house, the cool night air doing nothing to soothe his racing mind, he felt lost. The house wasn't far— he could see a faint glow of the light that had been left on in the window, but his legs felt like lead. His hand reached for his chest as his breath came in uneven bursts, the weight of what he'd just learned pressing down on him harder with each step.

Luke wasn't his father.

JJ had spent his whole life trying to escape the shadow of Luke Maybank, trying to be something more than just the screw-up son of an abusive deadbeat. But now...now he didn't even have that. He wasn't a Maybank.

He was the son of two kooks.

His whole life, he'd hated them, rejected everything they stood for, and now...now he was one of them.

He felt the pressure building in his chest, a familiar tightness, but it wasn't anger this time. It was something else — something he didn't know how to handle.

By the time he reached the door, his hands were shaking. He fumbled with the handle for a moment before pushing it open, stepping inside the dimly lit house. The space was quiet, almost too quiet, then he realized, he forgot the adventure that he was supposed to be involved in with his best friends.

But then he heard movement from the couch, and there she was, Kiara, standing up quickly when she saw him, concern etched all over her face. "JJ, where have you been? Why haven't you been answering my calls and texts?"

The worry Kiara felt formed into anger at the first glance of her boyfriend — at-least until she actually took in the male's stature.

JJ stared at her, unable to form words. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. His mind was a whirlwind of confusion and pain, and all he could think about was how everything had changed. He wasn't who he thought he was.

Kiara stepped closer, her eyes searching his face. "You're scaring me. What happened?"

JJ tore his gaze away from her, moving to the side, leaning against the edge of the wall. His hands rubbed over his face, trying to ground himself, but it wasn't working. He felt like the floor was shifting under him, like nothing was real anymore.

"I got a letter from that Wes genrette guy and in the letter, I was told to question my dad about something dealing with albatross...so I went looking for my dad...." JJ voiced — his voice barely above a whisper.

His eyes twitched at the parental term.

Kiara posture straightened as she approached JJ. "What happened? Talk to me Jayj" Her tone was soft as a comforting hand landed on his forearm. He cleared his throat, "He told me...he's not my dad."

The silence that followed was deafening. Kiara blinked, confusion flashing in her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"I'm not a Maybank," JJ continued, his voice strained, hollow. "Not an ounce," A hint of anger etched his voice as it trailed off. He snatched off his hat and walked deeper into the home as he vented.

"To top it off, my real parents are kooks — goddamnit!" He exclaimed as his feet connected with a chair, making it tumble over from its upright position.

Kiara was too stunned.

"Who is it?" Kiara asked slowly and softly, cautious of touching the sensitive nerve. "Wait —" she immediately interjected as the realization kicked in. "You got the letter from Wes...and Chandler — that his name wasn't it...he was being weird towards you during our meeting. It's him isn't it," Kiara asked as she stared at JJ's back.

She approached him as he nodded his head. "That means his wife..."

"Yeah," JJ unintentionally interrupted as he sat on the couch. He was emotional.

Kiara's face softened in shock, and she sat beside him slowly, processing the information. "JJ, I...I'm so sorry"

"I don't know who I am anymore," JJ muttered, his voice cracking as he leaned forward, elbows on his knees, his face buried in his hands. "Everything I thought I knew about myself — it's all bullshit!" He screamed in his hands.

Kiara's hand rested gently on his back, but JJ could feel himself slipping further. He always prided himself on holding it together, keeping everything in check, but now? Now, he didn't know how to stop the floodgates. He didn't know how to stop the overwhelming sense of loss.

"JJ, that doesn't change who you are," Kiara whispered, her hand running soothing circles along his back.

He shot up, his eyes blazing with frustration. "Doesn't it? I'm not this scrappy kid who made it out of his shitty situation. I'm some rich kook's son who was left to rot on the Cut." His voice cracked, and he swallowed hard, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill over. "I don't have anyone and I don't belong anywhere, Kie."

"Don't say that," Kiara said firmly, standing up with him. She looked him in the eye, her gaze steady. "You have us...you have me. And you're JJ. You're still you."

But JJ shook his head, backing away from her, his breath coming out in harsh, shallow bursts. "I don't even know how to be me right now."

Kiara stepped forward and gently placed her hands on either side of his face, forcing him to look at her. "Hey. Look at me. You've always been more than your name or where you come from. It doesn't matter if you're a Maybank or not. You're JJ, and you've survived everything that's been thrown at you."

JJ's chest tightened, and for the first time, he let the tears fall. He couldn't stop them now, not when everything was unraveling right in front of him. Kiara pulled him close, wrapping her arms around him as he broke down in her embrace.

His grip tightened around her as he clung to her, "I don't know what to do," JJ whispered, his voice muffled against her shoulder.

Kiara held him tighter, not offering any more words. Sometimes, silence spoke louder, and she knew JJ needed this — needed to feel like someone was there, that he wasn't completely alone. She didn't have all the answers, but she was there, and for now, that was enough.