Between Arrows and Hearts - Daryl Dixon

Might as well quit

Daryl lay stretched out on the RV floor, trying to get some sleep, but it was impossible. The sound of Andrea clicking and unclicking her gun mixed with Carol's heart-wrenching sobs, eating away at him. He'd had enough. He sat up with a frustrated sigh. He might as well be walking the damn road instead of laying here listening to this.

"I'm gonna walk the road." He muttered to Andrea, who looked up, brows furrowed as she nodded.

He grabbed his flashlight and stepped out into the night, squinting a bit as his eyes adjusted. Dale was standing guard nearby, and the two exchanged a nod. Dale didn't ask him where he was headed, just gestured down the road.

"She's over there." The old man said quietly, pointing toward one of the abandoned cars up ahead. Daryl's gaze followed, catching sight of a small light bobbing around.

Daryl thought about telling the old man he hadn't asked. He didn't care what she or anyone else in the group was doing. Or at least he shouldn't.  

All his life, he'd learned that nothing was ever free. People didn't just do things for others without wanting something in return. That was just how the world worked. It was a hell of a lot easier just not to owe anyone, to keep it clean.

But she? She didn't make sense to him. Cass was always acting like she wanted to help him, without expecting a damn thing in return.

She was the one who found him in the forest, offering a hand like it was the most natural thing in the world.  When that idiot Ben started mouthing off about the squirrels he'd brought, Cass defended him. She didn't think twice about running back to the city to help find Merle, and then got herself kidnapped in the process. She was the one who approached him to make sure he went with the group as they left the quarry. And every damn time, she acted like she didn't expect a thing back.

Daryl couldn't make sense of it. 

It pissed him off, if he was being honest. No one else would've given a damn about him. Why would she go out of her way like that for him? He'd spent nights trying to work it out. Maybe it was just in her nature. Or maybe it was pity, like he was some kind of charity case. That thought ate at him, burned him up inside. He didn't want her pity. He didn't want anyone's pity.

Either way, he hated feeling like he owed her. So here he was, with that nagging pull to look out for her, like it was some debt he couldn't shake.

Daryl grunted and stalked off toward it without a word. As he got closer, he recognized Cass, singing to herself in Spanish and rummaging through the trunk of a little car, oblivious to everything around her. Of course, she'd be out here, taking stupid risks in the middle of the night. His stomach twisted with a mix of irritation and something else.

When he was close enough, he flicked his flashlight on and off, making her jump and smack her head on the roof of the car. She muttered something in Spanish, clearly annoyed.

"Can't you talk?" She grumbled, rubbing her head.

Daryl let out a short snort. "'Ya oughta be asleep." He said, crossing his arms.

"I can't be in there. Felt like I was suffocating." She replied, shaking her head. "But look what I found." She nodded toward a bag on the ground next to her. "Some first-aid kits, clothes that might fit Sophia or Lottie, and even some comics for Carl."

He watched her as she rattled off the list of supplies. Of course she would be here in the dark, worrying about stuff for the kids.

She must've noticed him staring, because she stopped and gave him a shy look. "What?" She asked, a little flustered. He could tell she was blushing, even in the dim moonlight. "I'm just trying to make myself useful. I'm officially the world's worst babysitter, so might as well do something." She joked with a half-hearted shrug.