Caught Between Two

06

TW: Suicidal thoughts, self harm

Rachel's POV

"bwoy oh bwoy.. right back a square one" I silently spoke to myself as I was being lectured by my parents. They spared no details to let me know what a disappointment I was in their life. Growing up I had a great childhood. Both my mother and father had good respectable jobs, they were highly respected both in our community and at church as they were the Head Deacon and Deaconess which gave them a good reputation. I on the other hand was an only child who struggled to find love. People had great expectations for me given my good family background. My parents didn't make time for me as they were always busy with the church and because of this I felt abandoned and lonely. Their constant neglect to show me love caused me to gravitate towards the wrong crowd

While going to school, I started to skip classes with my once upon a time friends. I started to smoke and involve myself with various crimes such as stealing from small businesses and shops, I started to sell illegal substances on the school compound, I started to gamble, It had gotten so bad that I allowed my "friends" to peer pressure me into having sexual intercourse at school! Can you just imagine? The little innocent girl that u once knew she now turned into someone I could no longer recognize.

While dealing with my school life, my personal life was no better, my own best friend went behind my back and got together with my boyfriend. She played a hypocrite with me as she constantly told me not to worry about him cheating when I had suspected it and told her, searching for advice from someone I once loved very much. After I found the tapes and messages between them both I felt as if my world had ended and I was ready to end everything.

I had no one to vent to and this caused me to start acting out at home and secretly self harming. When my parents found out they were devastated. They wanted to send me away and leave me in the care of the government but I pleaded and begged that they give me another chance to get better. They reluctantly agreed and soon I found myself living with my aunt.

My aunt Marie wasn't any better than myself but she had gotten better after countless visits to the rehabilitation facilities and she was now a drug free individual and this served as a testimony to my parents. No need to say that's why I was now living with her. While living with my aunt I developed feelings for this boy that lived in her community. His name was Jay. He was tall and had an athletic body. Man! Was I inlove.

I had try many ways to get him to notice me by wearing revealing clothes and doing my hair and wearing makeup. But unfortunately, he was so caught up with my next door neighbor Jada. I hated her guts so bad. She was always in my way when I was trying so hard to get my future husband to notice me. This made me so upset that I started to look at here disgustedly whenever she walked by me.
You must can imagine how happy I felt when I heard that little miss goody two shoes was flying overseas.

"Operation tek a gyal blct mn!" I said to myself as I walked out of my house in the sluttiest outfit I could find. There he was, the love a mih life sitting on the wall along with his friends having a good time. I swept my hair to the side and walked flashing my hair trying to grab his attention. "Psst maamz" I heard someone say I walked by. Turning around I only saw that Jay was on his phone and the person that had called out to me was his friend Andrew.

"Kmft why him nah look??.. chro blct" I cursed to myself after feeling down. However just as I was about to give up I saw that his deep brown eyes were staring right at me. Feeling confident, I strutted over to where they were sitting and looked at him with a very intense gaze hoping he would spark up a conversation with me. Sadly , that was all ruined when his friend Andrew started to compliment my body and made it evident that he wanted to be with me.

Suddenly Jay got up from the area saying he was going inside to check up on his "baby". Just blct imagine afta mia do the most fih mek the bwoy see mi all him a do a medz the likkle ugly gyal kmt.  I then decided that I would try to get under his skin that day and openly declared that I wanted to be with Andrew.

Getting a stare from Jay I felt good within myself thinking to myself that "yes! Mi ketch him now!" Soon me and Andrew started to date, and we started to go on dates and he would shower me with gifts. But I just wished he would realize that I wasn't actually interested in him and wanted his friend instead.

Every time I say Jay I tried to start a conversation with him but he only kept the conversations small, maybe respecting the fact that I was his friends "woman" after all. I was so caught up in my feelings that I went to the bar near my house within my community and after a few drinks I only found myself knocking on Jay's door. He opened it dumbfounded but then suddenly just as I was about to kiss him, I saw Andrew in the background who started to question me asking if I was ok. "Chro blct every weh deh pussyole ya deh.. eva a fucc up mih ting"

Andrew being the caring person he is decided to carry me home, but seeing Jay stand outside his gate looking at us I decided to grab Andrew and kiss him in hopes that Jay would get jealous. One thing lead to the next and all I knew was that I wounded up in Andrew's room crying and moaning as the night sky fell.

"Yes Andrew yessss.. doh stoppp"
There I was moaning out my tripe as I felt Andrew's dick continuously go in and out of my frames. The sound of my wetness filled the air and soon I began squirting as he fingered my now sloppy pussy. But trust and believe the night was far from over. After I had squirted, Andrew held my neck and instructed me to lower myself onto my knees, which I did without hesitation. There I was with a 8 inch dick in my throat.

I spat and swallowed as I sucked his manhood. Andrew's moans filled the air as I began stroking his dick with my mouth. Soon after I felt a warm liquid flowing down into my throat which signaled that Andrew had reached his climax. I looked deep into his eyes as he instructed me to swallow. At first I was hesitant but not wanting to ruin the mood I did just that. As I collected my thoughts and got up off the ground I went to sit on the bed trying to cool off.

Suddenly, I felt Andrew's tight grip on my neck telling me to spread my legs apart and finger myself. Surprised, I did this with no hesitation or fear. I took two of my fingers and spat on them to further lubricate them and the next thing I know, there I was fingering myself while Andrew left wet kisses along my shoulders and breast.

The sound of his mouth on my now stiffened nipples helped me to reach my climax. I wanted to taste myself after such a steamy session but knowing how Jamaican man stay mi knw seh him woulda batta mih blct rt pon eh bed. After removing my fingers Andrew spared no time in forcefully entering his dick in me again. This time I was on top, riding as if there was no tomorrow. While moaning to make it evident that I was enjoying this I felt a release of cum entering me.

I quickly realized what had happened and got up off Andrew looking at him horrifically as I knew that this would result in me being pregnant. I was dumbfounded as I didn't realize that while I was fingering myself Andrew had removed the condom and disposed of it. I quickly got up and gathered myself and got dressed rushing out of his house. I went home hoping and praying that I could was just imagining things.

Couple Weeks later
After that night with Andrew we had not spoken since. Not a day goes by without me worrying if I was pregnant. I sat at home and made the decision to buy a pregnancy test. I sat patiently in the bathroom, feeling anxious I took out the test and with the count down of three I reluctantly spun the test around looking at the results. I was now living in a nightmare. "Young likkle gyal like me affi guh tek up baby mada duties pon me head" I repeated to myself as I stared at my reflection through the bathroom mirror.

A wave of emotions flashed through my head as I stood up crying. I mentally cursed myself while pondering back and forth what I was going to tell my aunt and parents, while also worrying if they would be in support. Besides all that I had to brave up and tell Andrew that we would be expecting a child together. I had high hopes that he would be happy and willing to help me in the raising of my child. But that was all a thought as I worried how it would be when I deliver such a news to him.