What Is Home?

UNH

Chesca POV:

The next day without fail, Tito and my father helped pack up some of my belongings into a small duffle bag before stuffing my things in the trunk of the car. I tried to protest this whole UNH excursion by saying that I'm wasting the time that I could be spending with Tito and his family but it was no use. It didn't matter how many excuses I came up with. They'd still send me off anyways.

It was decided that my father would drive me up. After the events from yesterday I wasn't really trusted to get there on my own.

The half hour of the drive was silent. I was too busy thinking about all of the ways that I fucked things up. Over the past few days I had tried calling and texting Jamie to no avail. She ignored every single one of my calls and texts until eventually, my texts began to turn green, indicating that Jamie had probably blocked my number.

I didn't know what to do with myself. The whole point of coming back to America was to try and win her back. Now that she isn't even speaking to me, there was no point in committing to an American college. If I had known that the hopes of us ever getting back together were next to none then I would've accepted the offer to play at the Juventus academy. Now I've derailed my whole future for nothing.

"It's just a tour and meeting the team Francesca. I don't know why you're so against it." My father said, finally breaking the 30 minute long silence.

"I already committed to UMaine. Why do we have to change things now?" I asked.

"I'm not saying that you can't still go to UMaine. I'm just saying that since this opportunity arised, it would be worth it to check it out. Especially since your decision to commit to UMaine wasn't really a rational decision. You chose to go there because it was the only other offer you had after Notre Dame rescinded their scholarship." My dad pointed out.

"It wasn't just because of that." I grumbled.

"I know. It's also because you hoped that by being in Maine you would be able to see Jamie again and possibly make things work between you two." My dad added.

"I don't want to talk about her." I grumbled.

"That's fine." My dad stated. Our conversation ended there and my dad began to idly tap his fingers on the steering wheel. We still had another half hour left of the drive and the silence was suffocating. I couldn't wait to get out of this car.

However, in all of my sulking and talking to my father, I hadn't realized the song that was playing on the radio. My heart lurched into my throat, beating louder and harder than it ever has before.

'Oh, home, let me come home'

'Home is wherever I'm with you'

'Oh, home, let me come home'

'Home is wherever I'm with you'

The song was 'Home' by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros. It was one of the songs that was on the playlist I had made for Jamie. It was one of the songs that without fail made me think of her every time I heard it.

God how could I be so stupid? Why the fuck did I tell her my home was back in Italy when I know that's not the truth? I want to be with her. I'd follow her anywhere if I had too.

Because my home isn't in Italy anymore. It's wherever I'm with her.

"Shut this song off." I stated as tears began to fill my eyes.

"What?" My dad asked.

"Please shut this fucking song off! I can't. I need it off!" I yelled.

"Okay fine!" My dad said with confusion as he quickly shut the radio off. Tears fell down my cheeks but sadness wasn't the only thing that I was feeling right now. I was also angry, not at Jamie but at myself.