One Stupid Thing

3-4:0:110

Dr. Lowen was hesitant to release me, especially after my episode, however Sarah vouched for me. All she's ever done is support me. Now she physically does as well. She helps me out of the Twinkie and loops my arm in hers. A pair of medical-grade sunglasses sit on my face, a precautionary measure to protect my eyes while they continue to heal. The boot is going to take some getting used to. It's not easy walking on unevenly, but I can manage.

"Welcome to Poguelandia 2.0, Stella B," John B says softly, coming up on my other side. He was thrilled when Sarah told him I was finally coming home and he picked us up in the van eagerly. He lays a hand on my shoulder and I turn my head in his direction. Shooting him a grateful smile.

I inhale deeply through my nose. "Ahh," I breathe out. "The smell of fish and weed. I missed it." John B squeezes my shoulder and laughs heartily.

"Come on. Watch your step. There are a few certain people who are really excited to see you!" Sarah says eagerly.

I remember seeing pictures of the newly renovated Maybank home from when Sarah would send them to me. Now, as she tells me when to step up onto the porch, I envision it in my mind. It's harder than I thought it would be. I keep reverting back to what it looked like when JJ's dad, Luke still lived here.

"We're back!" Sarah calls from the porch. I hear the door open so forcefully that it hits the wall.

"Cheese on bread!" Cleo's accent warms my heart. "We missed you, girl!" She throws her arms around me, catching me off guard and knocking my sunglasses off my face, but what some would find obnoxious I find comforting.

"Careful!" Sarah chimes in, being all protective.

"Oh, man, I'm sorry." Cleo tries to pull away but I just hang on tight.

"Don't be. I'm okay," I assure her.

"Uh, hey, other friends waiting over here."

I turn towards the voice, positively beaming. "Pope!"

He eases into the hug, pulling me into him softly. "It's been hard being the only sensible one around here. Glad to have you back, Stella."

"It's good to be back."

"Pope, move! Stop hogging her!" Pope barely pulls away from me when Kie takes his place, squeezing me tightly.

"Kie... broken... ribs," I remind her.

"Shit, sorry!" She loosens her grip but remains in the embrace. "Sorry. I'm just so happy you're here." Kie holds me by my shoulders and even though I can't see it, I know that she is looking right at me. "How are you doing?"

That question always has a way of making the waterworks start. "I've been better." I lift a hand to wipe a tear.

"You're going to get through this. You hear me?" she tells me firmly. "You are so strong." Her words only make me cry more.

Someone comes up behind me grabs my hand. My heart flips for a second before I realize that the hand is far to small to be his. "We are going to be here for you every step of the way," Sarah adds softly.

One by one my friends add to the pile until we are in one giant group hug. However, it's not totally complete. I lift my head up and swivel it around but I don't hear anything. No one's coming.

John B must've noted my confusion. "He's not here," he tells me. I calm the tremble in my voice.

"Oh. I mean, if my ex had just come back from living with the guy I had accused of him cheating with I wouldn't want to be there when he returned either—" I ramble, hobbling back a few steps. Everyone is awkwardly silent. "I can practically feel your guys's pity. It's fine. I'm fine."

"Hey," Sarah starts, squeezing my hand. "Let's go inside, yeah? I'll show you your room. John B, grab her things?" Only certain things were saved from the crash. A lot of it was too wet to be salvaged.

"Sure thing."

—

"Here we are!" Sarah announces, guiding me through the doorway. "Surprise!"

"I can't believe you guys gave me my own room."

"Well, we knew you'd come back at some point and no matter what happened you deserve to have your own place to stay here."

"Thank you. I'm sure it's beautiful."

"Duh. I'm the one who helped design it." Sarah begins describing everything to me. The white-washed furniture, the beige colored bed spread with sage accents, and the mural of photographs over the years. A dresser sits in the corner, accompanied by a chair and mirror that act as a makeshift vanity. The wall above the bed has a gigantic macrame tapestry covering the surface, which is the only wall painted a rich shade of olive. Tears spring in my eyes as she explains all the detail she put into it.

"Hey. Don't cry!" She slings an arm around my shoulders and pulls me into her side.

"I wish I could see it. You put so much work into it and I can't even appreciate it."

"Hey, no, don't say that. You are going to see again. I know it. Pope's been researching nonstop since the accident and—"

"We don't know that for sure!" I interrupt her. "Sarah, I don't want to get my hopes up. Not this time. Not again."

"Again? Wait, what are you talking about?" She assists me in sitting down on the edge of the bed beside her.

"I tried to call him. I tried to text him. In 16 months he never responded once." My voice cracks with emotion at the sensitive topic. "And then he makes certain that he's not home when I get here? I never stopped hoping, Sarah. I never gave up...."

"He hasn't been the same since you left, Stella. He'll disappear and I'll find him up here just looking completely lost."

"R-really?"

"He has completely isolated himself. After he came back from the airport—"

Her words confuse me. "Wait, airport?"

She pauses suddenly and then gasps in revelation. "Holy shit. You don't know."

"Don't know what, Sarah? What don't I know?"

"Do you remember how the day you left for Portugal he didn't even say goodbye?" I nod. "He regretted it. Like, big time regretted it. He was going absolutely insane knowing that you two left things like that. So, I might've encouraged him to go to the airport."

"You what?"

"Hang on, you can scold me after I finish. Anyways, he came back over an hour later just completely off his rocker. Like, I mean going absolutely insane. Talking to himself, having a full on panic attack. All because he was too late. He was going to go with you, Stell."

"Holy shit." I pause. "Holy shit. Why didn't you tell me?!"

"I didn't want you to get off the plane and immediately hop on another one. After everything you deserved to have a chance to get to know Margaret without the distraction," she explains. "You can't blame me for that."

My heart thuds in my chest. Oh my God. He was going to come with me to Portugal. It was going to be like every cringy romance movie where the guy shows up at the airport professing his love in front of everyone there, begging for her to forgive him. My chest aches at the thought of what could've been.

"So what you're saying is... there's a chance?"

"One hundred and ten percent, yes." Sarah takes my hands in hers and we squeal with catty laughter and joy.

"Uh, do I even want to know?" John B interrupts, arriving with my things.

"Probably not," I reply cheekily.

——
Awww this part is low key all over the place. At least we get some cute sisterly moments despite all the heavy emotions ;)