One Stupid Thing

Is There Still a Chance?

Dr. Lowen was hesitant to release me, especially after my episode, however Sarah vouched for me. All she's ever done is support me. Now she physically does as well. She helps me out of the Twinkie and loops my arm in hers. A pair of medical-grade sunglasses sit on my face, a precautionary measure to protect my eyes while they continue to heal.

"Welcome to Poguelandia 2.0, Stella B," John B says softly, coming up on my other side. He was thrilled when Sarah told him I was finally coming home and he picked us up in the van eagerly. He lays a hand on my shoulder and I turn my head in his direction, shooting him a grateful smile.

I inhale deeply through my nose. "Ahh," I breathe out. "The smell of fish and weed. I missed it." John B squeezes my shoulder and laughs heartily.

"Come on. Watch your step. There are a few certain people who are really excited to see you!" Sarah says eagerly.

I remember seeing pictures of the newly renovated Maybank property from when Sarah would send them to me. Now, as she tells me when to step up onto the porch, I envision it in my mind. It's harder than I thought it would be. I keep reverting back to what it looked like when JJ's dad, Luke still lived here.

"We're back!" Sarah calls from the porch. I hear the door open so forcefully that it hits the wall.

"Cheese on bread!" Cleo's accent warms my heart. "We missed you, girl!" She throws her arms around me, catching me off guard and knocking my sunglasses off my face, but what some would find obnoxious I find comforting.

"Careful!" Sarah chimes in, being all protective.

"Oh, man, I'm sorry." Cleo tries to pull away but I just hang on tight.

"Don't be. I'm okay," I assure her.

"Uh, hey, other friends waiting over here."

I turn towards the voice, positively beaming. "Pope!"

He eases into the hug, pulling me into him softly. "It's been hard being the only sensible one around here. Glad to have you back, Stella."

"It's good to be back."

"Pope, move! Stop hogging her!" Pope barely pulls away from me when Kie takes his place, squeezing me tightly.

"Kie... broken... ribs," I remind her.

"Shit, sorry!" She loosens her grip but remains in the embrace. "Sorry. I'm just so happy you're here." Kie holds me by my shoulders and even though I can't see it, I know that she is looking right at me. "How are you doing?"

That question always has a way of making the waterworks start. "I've been better." I lift a hand to wipe a tear.

"You're going to get through this. You hear me?" she tells me firmly. "You are so strong." Her words only make me cry more.

Someone comes up behind me grabs my hand. My heart flips for a second before I realize that the hand is far to small to be his. "We are going to be here for you every step of the way," Sarah adds softly.

One by one my friends add to the pile until we are in one giant group hug. However, it's not totally complete. I lift my head up and swivel it around but I don't hear anything. No one's coming.

John B must've noted my confusion. "He's not here," he tells me. I calm the tremble in my voice.

"Oh. I mean, if my ex had just come back from living with the person I had accused of him cheating with, I wouldn't want to be there when he returned either—" I ramble, hobbling back a few steps. Everyone is awkwardly silent. "I can practically feel your guys's pity. It's fine. I'm fine."