The Price of Legacy

TWO: Josie

I let out a long breath the second I closed the door to my dorm room, feeling the tension slowly unravel from my shoulders. God, I was so relieved to be back here-my safe space, away from the noise and the pressure and my own stupid awkwardness. I couldn't stop replaying the scene at the bar over and over in my head, the way I'd put my hand on Hope's, the way my voice had wavered when I warned her about the bartender. The way my cheeks burned when she called me out for not even bothering to say "hi" first.

You're such an idiot, Josie, I scolded myself, dropping onto the bed and burying my face in my pillow. That was the problem with me. I was always saying too much or not enough, stuck in this awful in-between that left me feeling completely ridiculous. I tried so hard to seem calm and confident, but the second Hope looked at me with those sharp, beautiful eyes, I felt like every word I said came out wrong

And, of course, Lizzie didn't help. She never did. I love my sister-she's my best friend, the one person who's always been there no matter what-but she never gets it. She'll try to listen sometimes, but she doesn't get it. Tonight was no different. Lizzie had practically shouted about my relationship with Penelope to the whole bar, and even though I know she thought she was being subtle, her drunken voice carried loud enough to draw the attention of half the people sitting nearby

I felt my cheeks grow hot again at the memory, the way my stomach churned when I saw the flicker of surprise cross Hope's face. Penelope and I had agreed to keep things quiet, and not because I was ashamed or anything. I just... didn't want people to get the wrong idea about us. We were both content with the way things were-two people who enjoyed each other's company without any strings or messy feelings. It was easier that way, safer. And Penelope liked her reputation just as it was. She was comfortable with people not knowing what we did behind closed doors, and I was fine with that.

Lizzie never saw it that way, though. To her, relationships were simple-either you were together, or you weren't. And she had no problem airing out my so-called "dirty laundry" for the world to hear. I knew she didn't mean to embarrass me, but that didn't make it any less humiliating. She didn't get how complicated things were for me, how hard it was to balance everything-the pressure of school, the legacy of our mom, the expectations from everyone around me. Sometimes it felt like I was constantly one step away from disappointing everyone.

Mom, at least, understood. She never judged me for being myself or expected me to live up to her accomplishments. Caroline Forbes was practically a legend at the Salvatore Boarding School, but she was still my mom, and she never made me feel like I had to be anything other than me. I don't think I could have survived here without her encouragement. She never pushed me to be perfect or compared me to anyone else, and that was everything.

A small smile tugged at my lips as I glanced over at the photo of my mom, Lizzie, and me on my desk, a reminder that even if I messed up, even if I didn't live up to everything she did, she would still love me. She'd always be proud of me, no matter how many mistakes I made, no matter how many times I felt like I didn't fit in. I was so grateful to have her, even if I could never quite put it into words. She had a way of making everything feel okay, of making me feel okay.

The familiar chime of my phone interrupted my thoughts, and I reached over to grab it from the nightstand. A text from Penelope flashed on the screen, a single message that made my stomach flip, even though I knew it shouldn't. "Can I come by?" she'd written, followed by a winky face emoji.

I stared at the text for a long moment, my thumb hovering over the screen. Part of me wanted to say yes, to lose myself in the comfortable familiarity of Penelope's arms. There was no pressure with her, no expectations, no feelings that went beyond the surface. It was easy. Safe. And I could use a little bit of easy right now.