Ocean's Daughter

Entry 2

Dear Diary,

I think that for me
I was looking for someone to numb the pain
I felt after leaving him
And for him? Well, I think he was just looking for another girl to keep him company

He was brand new in town and the rumors were flying that he wasn't a very nice guy
Back then I wasn't one to really listen to gossip,
but I quickly learned that he didn't care about me
And I guess I was used to dealing with boys who treated people like shit
I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, so I turned a blind eye to him and everything he would do

I asked him what he wanted to do when he got older and he said he wanted to move more south and see where life took him
I wanted to go with him wherever the future was taking him
I wanted to be there with him because I was afraid of my future and not only of being alone, but being left behind by anyone

I wanted to be with him even though I knew he didn't care about me and that he would never really care about me
The person who my heart really belonged to was moving on and I needed to move on too
And if I was really going to move on I wanted to move on with him

He would tell people we were together, and yes, I wanted him
But life had a funny way of showing us exactly who to not be with

I wanted his heart and soul and to always be looking in those bluish green eyes, but he wanted anything but real love
Love to him was a game and he was a player
And me? Well, I was a fool and just another girl he left haunted