Lost in your lens - NewJeans' Minji x M!Reader

Ch. 14 - Finding Focus

That late-night text brought them all to Danielle's apartment within the hour. Even at 3 AM, they came without hesitation - Haerin with her quiet concern, Hyein practically vibrating with worry, Hanni already filming "for future reference." Danielle's laptop showed Singapore's morning sun as she joined virtually, time zones forgotten in the face of friendship.

The familiar space felt different at midnight. Danielle's architectural models cast strange shadows in the dim light, their miniature buildings creating a tiny city around us. Her drafting table was covered in competition designs - dreams she was brave enough to chase across oceans.

"I messed up," I said simply, staring at my hands. "Or maybe we both did. I don't know anymore."

"Start from the beginning," Haerin suggested gently.

So I did. Told them about the gallery offer in New York. About my fears of being left behind. About words said in anger and insecurity. About how watching Minji fearlessly chase her dreams had made me face how afraid I was of chasing mine.

"She said I was hiding behind excuses," I finished quietly. "And maybe she's right."

"Of course she's right!" Hyein burst out, then immediately lowered her voice at Haerin's look. "Sorry, but... look at you! You're so busy being afraid of losing her that you're not even trying to build something for yourself here!"

"What Hyein means," Danielle interjected through the screen, her architect's precision finding the right words, "is that you came to Korea for yourself originally, didn't you? Before Minji, before any of us. You had dreams of your own."

"But they changed-"

"Did they?" Hanni asked, lowering her camera for once. "Or did you just start letting someone else's light outshine yours?"

The question hung in the air like cherry blossoms before a storm. Haerin got up silently, returning with tea that smelled like comfort and clarity.

"Look at this," she said quietly, pulling out her phone. She showed me a video from my first week in Korea - me struggling through basic Korean, determined despite every mistake. "This person knew what they wanted. They were scared but trying anyway."

"And now look," Hanni added, showing more recent footage. My Korean had improved, but something was missing. The fire, the personal drive, had been replaced by a different kind of motivation.

"You can't build a life on someone else's dreams," Danielle said, her voice soft through the speakers. "Trust me, I know. I almost gave up architecture because everyone said it was too hard, too far from home. But sometimes you have to be brave enough to build your own foundations."

"What are you actually afraid of?" Haerin asked, her question cutting through my defenses like always. "Losing Minji, or losing yourself?"

"Both," I admitted. "Everything. I watch her succeeding in New York, becoming this amazing photographer, and I'm just... here. Still struggling with basic conversations, still not sure if I belong."

"WRONG!" Hyein jumped up, passion overwhelming volume control. "You're not 'just here.' You're building something too! Or you could be, if you'd stop being so scared of doing it wrong!"

"She's right," Hanni nodded. "Every time you start making real progress with Korean, every time you start feeling comfortable here, you pull back. Like you're afraid of what happens if you actually succeed."

"Because if I succeed," the truth came out before I could stop it, "if I really build a life here, really commit to staying... what if she doesn't come back? What if I end up alone in a country I fought so hard to call home?"