Leaving London

Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty Three

The lulling sound of my trainers slapping against concrete gradually soothes me into a false security, my ponytail flopping against my cheekbones at regular intervals as I guide my legs down a tree-concealed pathway as a shortcut to the beach. It's currently half past six in the morning, but I guess that doesn't really mean a lot because the boost of coffee I swallowed this morning has ensured my fatigue has dissolved, and the rest of the world seems to be getting on with its day; wildlife scuttling around in beds of nettles, people out walking their dogs, birds swooping through the cloud-filled sky. The weather is pretty dim today, and even though sunrise has already rolled by, the sun is struggling to beam through the layer of white candyfloss outlining the horizon. It's funny that, actually, considering yesterday was one of the warmest days of the year so far. Yesterday was also one of the most awkward days I've encountered recently. After the silent dismissal between Amy and Alfie, Alfie had tried to speak to me as we went down for surfing - and I quietly told him that what he had done to Amy wasn't very respectful of him, and that we could just take the rest of the holiday as it came, friends or not. The surfing was fun, especially because it made everyone a little out of their comfort zones. I spent most of the time sunbathing in rifts of sand and yelling the occasional shout of motivation to whoever was surfing. Olli was out there the whole time, teaching and instructing, so at least it meant I got a bit of a break from him. Well, that was until everyone finished and piled inside some of the pastel coloured changing huts, meaning I was left alone with him.
He'd asked me how things were with Mia and Lara, and I'd told him honestly that I hadn't heard a peep out of them - which I still haven't - and he told me how Mia had been texting him more and more recently, and it seemed like she wanted to give being friends or maybe more a shot.
"She's still so mad at you, but I think she's gotten over Lara being a bad friend." He'd said drily, turning back to his pinging phone. I'd left at this point, in a huff. I thought he had been trying to make things easier on me, not to just point out the obvious, huh?
The smattering of my feet along the pavement slows to a patter as I skip down to the sand, and I carry on running, sand sinking and whirling around the sole of my shoes like clouds of beige dust. It infiltrates into my socks and sticks to my feet as my arms and legs pound on, carrying me across the shore. It's completely empty at this time of the morning, and the swishing noise of the water heaving onto the sand urges me forwards even though my legs ache and a stitch is bundled under my ribcage. I turn as I reach the jumble of rocks cutting off the end of the stretch, and scamper up the chunky-cut stone steps until I reach the boardwalk again. The return run is always less enjoyable, and I'm panting and heaving raggedly for breath by the time I reach the shortcut path. The atmosphere is more humid under the leafy canopy, so I struggle to go faster to get back out into fresher air. I'm just flailing around a corner when I crash into a blurred figure, sending myself sprawling into the undergrowth and forcing them to drop their bags and fall to their knees.
"Ah, crap," I mumble under my breath as I slowly press up off the ground, wincing at the pain in my leg, "I'm so sorry, I didn't see you coming and I was running - are you okay?" I pick myself up from my crouched position and hobble over to the bent-over figure.
The person starts to turn their face, "Yeah, I'm good - wait, Fearne?" My mouth fills with bitter regret as I stumble to turn and busy myself fiddling with my sweats to take a look at my leg.
"Lara," I say slowly, "Look, I'll help." I avoid raising my face but start picking up assortments of food products which had scattered under fallen branches; collecting a slightly dented tin of kidney beans, a packet of now-crushed biscuit swirls, and a fizzing bottle of lemonade.
"Here." I say, handing her the food, although all the plastic bags have torn and lie strewn over the mud.
"I'll carry it." She states tightly, trying to bundle it all up in her arms.
"You won't be able to carry all that." I scoff, "I'll help you bring some of it back."
"No, no, you don't have to-"
"It's the least I can do." I say firmly, wrapping a selection of bruised fruit and a loaf of squished bread under my arms. I know the way back to Lara's, of course, but I trail behind her as if I don't so that I can avoid the inevitable awkwardness.
There's still a noticeable tension growing as we carry on through to Lara's estate, and I clear my throat before speaking.
"How come you were out shopping so early? Did you-"
"-Please, Fearne, just don't," I hear her sigh. I shut my mouth pretty quickly, feeling my heart sink further and I carry on striding after her quickened steps. She clearly regrets her decision to cut off my speech as she soon replies with a quick, "I just needed to get out of the house."
I nod understandingly, even though she can't even see it. By the time we get to her familiar front door, I straggle on the driveway.
"Would you like me to just leave this stuff by the door?"
"No, it's fine. You can come in." I follow after her into the cold, marble hallway, and this time upon entry the house gives off a different vibe. No longer welcoming or friendly or filled with the scent of burning cinnamon candles, but the dim hallway makes me just feel out of place. I quicken to load everything down onto the table, almost walking straight into Lara with my haste for the door.
"Hey, Fearne, what happened to your leg?" I spin, simultaneously glancing down at my legs, where a dark red stain has bloomed upon my left knee.
"Oh, I forgot. I cut myself when I fell." I say bluntly, peeling up the grey material of the sweatpants. A crimson scar juts over my kneecap, tearing up with blood now I've rolled up the material.
"You should get something on that," Lara says, yanking down a box of pills and bandages from one of the cupboards, "Here." She screws open a tube of white ointment and rubs some over the wound before passing me a dressing.
"Thanks," I grimace, as the ointment soaks into the scar and starts to sting, "What is this stuff?"
"It'll help," She sighs and closes the cupboard door with a firm nudge.
"So...are we going to talk anytime soon?" I ask, gritting my teeth as I wind the dressing around my leg and secure it.
"I don't see what there is to talk about, you made it pretty clear how you felt when you betrayed Mia. And kept things from me."
"I never kept anything from you," I whisper, "There was never anything going on previously, okay? It just happened out of the blue, I swear."
"Yeah, well. Mia is still furious, and I don't want her turning against me either. I want us all to be friends, but with Mia that's not going to be easy." I grunt in response to Lara, twiddling my hair between two pinched fingers.
"I know, but that doesn't mean you have to hate me." I say wryly.
"I don't...hate you, Fearne. I was just shocked, and angry, and I want to show support for my best friend!"
"I understand," I speak softly, "Well...just remember that it was a mistake! And I've already paid for it."
"I know that. I'm sorry for ruining your time with your friends."
"How did you know?" I query. She's been avoiding me since the incident, so I don't know how she found out about my friends being here!
"Oh, Olli told us." She shifts uneasily, obviously indicating that her and Mia had been to meet Olli without me. Not that I'd expect any special treatment.
"I'd better get going anyway, but thanks for the bandage." I smile slightly, backing out of the room.
"That's okay. I guess...I guess I'll see you around?"
"Yeah." I promise, as I open the front door and stride out into the light, ignoring the dull pain in my leg and focusing on the uplifted sensation flooding through my mind.