since our eyes first met - Minsung

챕터true friends

Minho's POV:

I was alone in our room. Again. Since Jisung met Yeona after a long time again, he's only spending time with here. 

Sure I could still spend time with the others but Seungmin, Hyunjin and Felix are constantly throwing a mess, Changbin would let me work out until I can't breath anymore, Bangchan is working all the time and Jeongin... Yeah. Maybe I could spend time with him now. 

He's probbayply the  one of the members that isn't forcing me do to something stupid with him.

Don't get me wrong, I love them all and I couldn't imagen a life without them, the band or a life in the dorm without them, but still I just want to spend some time with Jisung again.

He's my best friend after all.

And I know I keep ignoring him but I want him to notice that I don't like that he's spending so much time with Yeona. 
She's a noce girl, from what I've heard, yeah, but I have the feeling that he's mow spending more time with her.

I sighned and got up from my bed to knock at Jeongin and Chans door to ask if Jeongin wanna do something.

I took a deep breath, trying to shake off the feeling of loneliness that had settled over me. I wasn't mad at Jisung, not really. It's just... I felt a little left behind. He and Yeona had that spark, that connection that seemed to fill up every conversation they had, every moment they shared. And I was just... there.

The thought stung a little more than I wanted to admit. He was my best friend. He knew me better than anyone else, and now it felt like I was slowly losing that closeness, like we were drifting apart.

With a sigh, I walked down the hall, my footsteps echoing softly in the quiet dorm. I reached Jeongin and Chan's door and paused for a second, wondering if Jeongin would even be up for anything. He was usually so chill, always willing to hang out. I knocked lightly on the door, leaning against the frame as I waited.

A few moments later, the door creaked open, revealing Jeongin in his pajamas, rubbing his eyes like he'd just woken up.

»Hey, Minho hyung,« he greeted sleepily, his voice still thick with sleep. »What's up?«

»Hey,« I said, smiling a little despite myself. »I was wondering if you wanted to hang out. Maybe watch a movie or something? I'm kinda bored.«

Jeongin blinked, his expression softening as he processed what I said. »Of course, I'm always down for hanging out. You alright though? You seem... off.«

I chuckled softly, though there was a hint of sadness in my voice. »Just a little tired of being alone, I guess. Thought I'd check in with you.«

Jeongin gave me a knowing look, his eyes narrowing slightly as he leaned against the doorframe. »You miss Jisung, don't you?« he asked, his voice quiet, but somehow cutting right through me.

I felt a lump form in my throat, but I nodded. »Yeah, I do. He's been so caught up with Yeona lately, and I... I just feel like he's slipping away from me.«

Jeongin's face softened, and he stepped aside, gesturing for me to come in. »Come on in, hyung. Let's talk. Maybe we can figure out what's going on.«

As I entered the room, I felt a weight lift slightly off my shoulders. Maybe it wouldn't solve everything, but talking to Jeongin—someone who wasn't caught up in all the drama—might help me see things a little clearer.

»Thanks, Jeongin,« I said, sinking onto the couch. »I needed this.«

Jeongin just smiled, sitting down beside me. »Anytime, hyung. We're a family, remember?«

And for the first time in a while, I felt like maybe I wasn't as alone as I thought.

I shifted uncomfortably on the couch, the warmth of Jeongin's presence next to me strangely calming. I had to admit, just being around someone who wasn't constantly caught up in the chaos of our daily lives felt like a little escape. But I couldn't escape the thoughts that kept swirling in my head.

»You know,« I started slowly, not meeting Jeongin's gaze, »I've been... kinda ignoring Jisung lately.« The words tasted bitter on my tongue, even though I knew they were true. »It's not like I want to, but... I just feel like I have to. Like, if I keep pretending everything's fine, maybe he'll notice that something's wrong.«

Jeongin was quiet for a moment, giving me time to collect my thoughts. »So, you're upset with him?« he asked, his voice gentle but probing, like he was trying to understand. »Because he's been spending so much time with Yeona?«

I nodded, letting out a long sigh. »Yeah, I guess. It's not just that though. It's... I don't know. It's like he's changed. I miss the times when it was just the two of us, you know? When we could just hang out, no distractions.« I rubbed a hand over my face, frustration creeping back into my chest. »But now? Now, it feels like I'm not even part of his world anymore. Like I'm just... there.«

Jeongin shifted next to me, his expression thoughtful. »It sounds like you're really torn. You care about him, but it's hard to watch him grow close to someone else, right?«

I let out a shaky breath, surprised by how easily Jeongin understood, even though I hadn't exactly said much. »Yeah,« I admitted. »I guess that's exactly it.«

Jeongin gave me a small smile, though there was a hint of sympathy in his eyes. »I get it, hyung. You're not alone in this. We all feel like that sometimes. But... maybe you need to talk to him about it. I mean, I know you're not the type to open up about your feelings, but maybe... Jisung doesn't even realize how much it's hurting you.«

I almost laughed, though it came out bitter. »Talk to him?« I shook my head. »I don't even know where to start. And honestly... I don't know if I can. I don't know how to tell him that I feel like this. That it's not just about him hanging out with Yeona. It's about me not being able to handle the fact that he's slipping away from me. That I...«

I stopped myself, suddenly realizing what I was saying. I clenched my jaw, trying to push the words back down. It was dangerous territory. The truth was something I couldn't even admit to myself, let alone to anyone else.

Jeongin, sensing my hesitation, didn't push me further. He just sat quietly for a moment, as if giving me the space to gather myself. Then, he lightly punched my shoulder, trying to lighten the mood. »Look, hyung, I don't know if you're ready to talk to him about all this, but... I think you should. Even if it's just a small step. You can't keep it bottled up forever.«

I let out another deep sigh, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on me. »I don't know, Jeongin. It's just hard. I can't even figure out what I feel half the time. And... I can't let him know how much it hurts. I don't want him to think I'm jealous or... weak.«

Jeongin gave me a quick, serious glance. »You're not weak, hyung. You're just human. And no one's gonna think less of you for wanting to keep the people you care about close. Trust me, I've seen you take on way harder things than this.«

I wanted to believe him, I really did. But admitting how much Jisung meant to me, how much it hurt that he was drifting away, was a different kind of hard. A kind of hard I wasn't sure I was ready for.

»Thanks, Jeongin,« I said softly, finally looking over at him. »You don't know how much this means right now. It's good to have someone to talk to about all this.«

He smiled again, more brightly this time, and nudged me lightly with his elbow. »Of course, hyung. You're like a big brother to me. You don't have to keep everything inside.«

I nodded, feeling a small weight lift from my chest. Maybe, just maybe, I could talk to Jisung about this someday. But for now, having Jeongin's understanding felt like enough. Even if I couldn't admit it to myself, let alone anyone else, I was starting to realize that maybe—just maybe—I needed to face what I felt before it consumed me.

But there was no way I could say it out loud. Not yet.

A chapter in Minho's POV again! I've failed with what I wanted to do. I wanted that Minho isn't talking much about feelings but I just couldn't stop myself in here. And please no hate for what I'm writing
1450 words in this chapter (❤️'艸｀❤️)