We are cursed

Chapter Four

Simmons sat on her bed whilst Dr Carver sat in a chair near the end of her bed.
"It was bitter, not sweet at all. I'd imagined the taste of a fresh strawberry for months, but like most things since being back, it just wasn't what I'd remembered"
"Most things aren't. Memories have a funny way of changing on you when you're not looking. How about you? You feel any different since you've been back? Besides your taste buds, I mean. Any trouble sleeping or anxiety?"
"No"
"Shock, rage, depression?" He listed off the usual suspects, if Jemma was in his place she would've asked the same questions.
"I know you're looking for signs of PTSD. But I assure you, I'm fine"
"You've been through something pretty extreme. There will be after effects and that's okay. It's okay to struggle, to feel uncomfortable in your own skin"
"I'm not one of your inhuman patients, Dr Garner"
"No. No, you're not. But survivor stories have always fascinated me. How they got through it. The Chilean miners relied on routine, work, exercise, rest, gave each other jobs"
"They had each other"
"Well, not all of them. One hiker was stranded on Mount Hood for six nights in the snow. Said her faith saved her. That and the thought of all the loose ends she left behind, the people she cared about. She never gave up hope"
"I did" Jemma said without realizing. She needed to get back into the lab and for that she needed Dr Carver to sign off on it.
"Do you remember a specific moment when that happened?"
"Honestly, I'd rather look forward than back. I have a very interesting new project that I'm trying to focus on-"
"It's okay, you don't have to talk about it. Just know you got a lot of friends here who care a lot about you. You're safe now, Jemma. It's over" She took in a shaky breath.
"You're wrong"
"How so?"
"I'm tired. Can we stop there?" She was deflecting and it was very obvious to Dr Carver.
"We can. Take care of yourself, Jemma. Sleep, eat, do some exercise, get out of this room" She nodded as he stood "See you soon" She managed a small smile before he left the room, closing the door behind her. She needed to get back into the lab, how else would she bring Will back?

"Schematics?" Fitz looked over the file in his hands "There's notes all over this in Simmons handwriting. Seismic mounts. Cry-"
"What are you doing?" Jemma charged into the lab.
"Jemma, I'm just trying to-"
"No, don't" She tried to grab the file off of him but it fell to the ground "Look, those are mine and now they're out of order. And you, what did you tell him?" Jemma bit at Bobbi and Fitz picked up the papers.
"Jemma, relax. We're just analyzing the inhumans DNA"
"All this data, what's it for?" Fitz asked.
"Just stay away from my things" Jemma took the papers from him and headed back out of the lab.
"What just happened? Did she say something to you?" Bobbi shook her head.
"It should come from her"

Jemma moved into the gym where Bobbi was running on the treadmill.
"Looks like your rehab's going well"
"Can't lie, doesn't feel like it" Bobbi admitted as she stepped off the treadmill.
"I understand. I read up on your surgeries, two on the knee, three on the lung"
"What's left of it. Don't forget those fun loving abscesses"
"Well, knowing you, I'm sure you'll be 100% in no time. I'm sorry I snapped before"
"Oh, no apology necessary"
"I thought you told Fitz what I told you and I-"
"Jemma, seriously, stop. I mean, here I am, complaining to you, after what you've been through" Jemma flinched at her words "Have you told anyone else that you want to go back?" Jemma shook her head "You might want to. There's someone in particular who's really worried about you"
"I wonder who that might be" Jemma managed to joke.
"He's driving me nuts, you know? The other day, he snapped at me just because I put a bio sample into a clear specimen bag"
"Clear?" Jemma laughed "Well, B is for blue is for biological" Bobbi made a face "And now I see how that would drive you out of the lab"
"Actually, it's not all Fitz's fault. I just got this old, familiar feeling in my gut and I had to run"
"What feeling is that?"
"Like Hunter's in trouble"
"You'll figure it out, I'm sure" Jemma gave her a small smile.
"So will you" Bobbi smiled.

Jemma was looking through the paperwork on her bed when a knock sounded at her door. She slid it all under the throw before she called out to the person on the other side.
"Come in" Fitz entered, cup of tea in hand, no doubt just the way she liked it "Thank you Fitz, but there's no reason to dote over me, I'm fine" She took the cup from him and placed it on her desk.
"Why do you want to rebuild the portal, Jemma? I saw the schematics, the data, the astronomical research you've been doing, and...I just can't understand it. After everything you've been through why would you-"
"Because I have to get back there" She turned to finally meet his eyes "And I need your help to do. Something happened to me, Fitz, on the other side. It's time I told you the truth, about everything"

Fitz stormed out of the room, slamming her door closed behind him as he marched off. Jemma chased after him but he showed no signs of slowing down.
"Fitz! Please talk to me. Just stop!" She begged but Fitz continued his march on into the kitchen where the rest of the team were.
"Tell them" He finally said, his angry eyes meeting her cloudy ones.
"Fitz, please"
"Whilst we were trying to save her Jemma was shacking up with an astronaut!" His anger was clear and Jemma wanted nothing more than to run away and hide.
"Fitz-" Her tears started to fall.
"Alone on a desolate wasteland. That's how you described it, so why bring him up now?"
"Fitz, stop it. Look at what you're doing to her" Daisy moved to her side, wrapping an arm around her.
"You've been begging for sympathy and the entire time you've just been waiting until you could get back to him, and then what? Did you even think it through?"
"You don't know what that place was like-"
"No but I'm sure you spent your time well there"
"Fitz enough" Coulson bit.
"196 days, Fitz. For you all it was days but for me so much time had passed, I thought that you would never find me. I spent days alone, figuring out what was safe to eat and what I could drink. Will found me and protected me"
"Oh my God" Fitz groaned into his hands.
"What do you want from me, Fitz? Do you want me to apologize for surviving?"
"No, of course not" He sighed heavily "I'm sorry, but you should've told us everything when you woke up"
"When I woke up I expected Will to be there with me and when he wasn't I wasn't sure how you would take it or even if you understand. I expected something, just not this reaction"
"I understand I do but, how could you think that I would just give up on you?"
"I feel guilty enough already. I wouldn't have survived without him" Fitz fell silent "Talk to me Fitz. Please" He sighed and left the room. More tears fell and Jemma quickly wiped them away "I'll talk to him" She managed to mutter before she pulled out of Daisy's arms and headed after him, catching up to him in the lab.
"Please Fitz, I need you to understand"
"I understand everything, Jemma"
"Then why won't you talk to me?" Fitz slammed down a file onto the work bench "What are you doing?"
"We're going to get him back" Jemma started to cry, except this time they were happy tears. Full of joy.