Heartbreak Weather || ᴺⁱᵃˡˡ ᴴᵒʳᵃⁿ

𝟎𝟖. 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐀𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐲

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑

08. 𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘈𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘺

I woke up the next morning to an eerie silence in the apartment. Last night's fight still rang fresh in my ears. The words Paul and I hurled at each other replayed like a broken record, and the memory of kicking him out still made my stomach churn. I knew I had every right to stand my ground, but that didn't make the aftermath any easier.

I wandered into the kitchen and absentmindedly flipped through my planner while sipping on lukewarm coffee. My eyes landed on a date circled in red: – February 10th 4 year Anniversary!!

Four years.

I couldn't stop the ache in my chest. Four years with Paul, and this was where we were now—arguing, doubting each other, questioning everything. How had we gotten here?

After forcing myself to eat a light breakfast, I curled up on the couch with my guitar. Writing music always helped me sort through my emotions, and today I needed it more than ever. Strumming softly, I started playing around with chords and melodies, letting my feelings flow into the strings.

The lyrics came in fragments: frustration, love, heartbreak, confusion. They weren't cohesive yet, but they were raw, and that was enough. I lost myself in the music for hours, only snapping back to reality when I heard the faint sound of the front door opening.

I froze.

Paul stepped into the apartment, his face guarded and his posture stiff. He still had his duffel bag slung over one shoulder, a clear sign he hadn't been home since last night. For a second, we just stared at each other, the weight of everything unsaid hanging in the air.

"You're back," I said finally, setting my guitar aside.

He nodded. "I needed to come home. We need to talk."

My chest tightened. "Do we? Because last night felt like enough talking to last a lifetime."

Paul sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I was out of line, Fallon. I know that. But can we at least try to talk this out without tearing each other apart?"

I bit the inside of my cheek, debating whether to even let him in further. Eventually, I stood and crossed my arms. "Fine. Let's talk."

Paul set his bag down by the door but didn't move closer. "I overreacted about Niall. I know that. I let my insecurities get the better of me, and I took it out on you."

"Yeah, you did," I shot back, my tone sharper than I intended. "And for what? Because I had the audacity to have friends who support me? You've known Niall was my idol for years, Paul. You knew this."

"I know!" he snapped, his voice louder now. "I know that, Fallon. But knowing it doesn't stop the thoughts in my head. It doesn't stop me from feeling like I'm not enough for you."

His words stopped me cold. "Not enough? Paul, where is this even coming from? We've been together for four years. I chose you, every single day."

Paul's jaw clenched, and he stepped closer. "And yet, every time I see you with him, all I can think about is how much better he'd be for you. He's Niall Horan, Fallon. How the hell am I supposed to compete with that?"

I took a shaky breath, trying to rein in the storm of emotions building inside me. "Paul, this isn't a competition. It's never been one. Niall is my friend, nothing more. You're the one I come home to. You're the one I love."

He looked away, his shoulders sagging. "I want to believe that. I do. But last night...I don't know. It felt like everything was slipping away."

I stepped forward, placing a hand on his arm. "Nothing is slipping away. But if you keep pushing me like this, if you keep doubting us, then you're the one who's going to ruin this, Paul. Not Niall. Not anyone else. You."

Paul's eyes met mine, and for a moment, he looked so vulnerable it almost broke my heart. "I'm scared of losing you, Fallon," he admitted softly.

My voice softened in response. "Then stop pushing me away."

The tension between us lingered, thick and suffocating. I could feel his internal battle, the part of him that wanted to let go of his insecurities warring with the part that couldn't. Finally, he nodded.

"I'll try," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

I exhaled deeply, the weight on my chest lifting just slightly. "That's all I ask."

We stood there for a moment, the silence heavy but not unbearable. Then Paul reached out and pulled me into a hug. It wasn't the solution to all our problems, but it was a start.

As we pulled apart, I caught sight of the date circled in my planner. "Our anniversary's next week," I said quietly.

Paul glanced at the planner and gave me a small smile. "I haven't forgotten."

His words were simple, but they carried a promise I desperately wanted to believe in.

Later that evening, I found myself sitting in bed with my laptop, scrolling through ideas for my album release party. I wanted it to be perfect—a celebration of everything I'd poured into this record.

Paul was lying beside me, flipping through a book, the tension from earlier seemingly gone. I glanced at him, the way the soft glow of the bedside lamp highlighted his features, and felt a pang of guilt. As much as his insecurities frustrated me, I couldn't ignore how deeply they affected him.

"Hey," I said, nudging him gently.

He looked up, his eyebrows raised. "Yeah?"

"I'm thinking about the release party," I said, closing my laptop and turning to face him. "I want it to be big, but not too big, you know? Like, I want it to feel personal."

Paul set his book down and smiled. "That sounds perfect. You deserve it."

His support warmed me, and for a moment, I let myself believe that everything would be okay.

The next morning, I woke up feeling lighter. Paul had stayed the night, and though things weren't completely back to normal, they felt closer.

I spent the day reaching out to venues and planning the details of the release party. It was a welcome distraction from the lingering tension between Paul and me.

By the evening, I had a venue booked and a list of guests to invite. As I looked at the finalized details, a sense of excitement bubbled up inside me.

This album was my heart and soul, and I couldn't wait to share it with the world.

𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐘 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐒!

Y'all sorry for not updating in a while I've acc been so busy but anyways enjoy this shit chapter x