IF YOU'RE HANDSOME LIFE IS EASIER

074

In Korea, there's a longstanding tradition of playful teasing called eolleri-kolleri.
It happens whenever a boy and girl are perceived as being a good match, even if all they do is walk to school together.
The teasing is relentless, and the only way to stop it is a direct counterattack.

'If you react awkwardly, it only leaves room for more teasing. But if you just outright own it, there's nothing left to mock.'

So, I faced it head-on.

"Yes, I like it. Sujin's cute and pretty, isn't she?"

If there was an unexpected variable in play, it was-

"Hyat?!"

Sujin's startled cat-like cry.
Other than that, the atmosphere seemed to settle down nicely.

"Wow, Donghu, you're such a man! So bold!"
"Man, this is gold. Jiseok, you can't even tease him for this."
"Seoksam-hyung, step out."
"..."

The seasoned variety veterans were incredibly sharp, bouncing banter back and forth effortlessly.

"Still, to say something like that here... Can we even air this?"
"Isn't this basically a public confession?"
"No way! Just calling her cute and pretty isn't a confession. You're all so mean!"

As the teasing subtly prodded for my intentions, I nodded cheerfully.

"Yeah, I just said it because she's cute and pretty."
"This guy... Handsome face, smooth words... You've got a lot of sins to atone for."
"Seoksam-hyung."
"Hm?"
"Please. Step out."
"...Fine."

Ordinarily, this would've been the moment to wrap things up and move to the opening, but Sujin's genuine shock reignited the flames in the corner.

"But Sujin seems really surprised. She looks so flustered-shouldn't we hear her thoughts on this?"
"Uh, um, ah..."

Maybe I came on too strong?
Sujin was still bright red, completely out of sorts.
She wasn't in a state to give any kind of reaction.

Fortunately, the cast members jumped in with quick improvisation.

"Hyung, come on, she's a teenager. Asking for her thoughts on this is too much."
"Alright, Gukjong, should I ask about your love life then...?"
"Hyung, I'm clenching my fist right now."
"...Have I mentioned how glad I am to have been born before you?"

After a round of laughter to lighten the mood, Yoo Jiseok, the MC, smoothly transitioned to the real opening.

"Alright then, before we dive into today's Rushman episode, how about some quick words from our guests? Let's start with Donghu!"

Feeling the true essence of variety shows, I said exactly what I wanted.

"I've always been a big fan of the name tag elimination game. I'm really excited, and I want to rip off as many tags as possible!"
"Ah, the name tag game! Speaking of which, we can't ignore the fact that Donghu here is a youth boxing champion."

"Think we could get a quick demo?"

It was time for self-promotion.
Like I'd been waiting my whole life for this moment, I darted to the center and started shadowboxing.

Keeping it short, about ten seconds, I threw clean, sharp punches into the air.
The surrounding cast let out an impressed "Oooh," and I stopped immediately, bowing politely.

"...Can I call you hyung?"
"Kangsu, why would you call Donghu hyung?"
"He's... really intimidating."
"Good-looking, good at fighting... He's like a manga character. Hey, can I-"
"Seoksam-hyung."
"...You want me to step out again?"
"You know the drill."
"...Okay."

Sujin was asked a similar question, and she wrapped up by saying she'd been practicing running specifically for today.
With that, the official Rushman opening kicked off.

"Hello, beloved viewers! Today on Rushman! As we introduced earlier, we have the rising superstars joining us! Let's dive into the madness! Go, go, go!"

"Before we begin, let's announce the penalty for today."
"...Wait, you just finished the opening, and now penalties already?"
"Yes, the losing team will be doing a casual bungee jump."
"Bungee jumping is... a bit much..."
"Guests included, no exceptions."

As sighs filled the air, Sujin sidled up to me and whispered.

"Have you ever done bungee jumping?"
"Nope. Never."
"Me neither. This is bad..."

So, she's scared of stuff like this.

'Sujin really is cute.'

It was time to split into teams.
Just as I was wondering how the teams would be divided, PD Jiyujin made an announcement.

"Since Gukjong lost the last penalty, he gets the first pick for teams."
"Wait, isn't that unfair? We all know who he'll pick first."

I'll take Donghu. He seems like he'll be amazing."
"Is this even balanced? This looks so lopsided. Jiseok-hyung, do something!"
"Kangsu, we're going full Romeo and Juliet strategy. I'll pick Sujin!"

Chaos ensued as the teams were finalized.
Sujin and I just stood there, watching everything unfold.

The final teams were:

Chasers (3 members): Me, Gukjong-sunbae, and Kang Giri-sunbae.
Survivors (6 members): Everyone else.

"Why does it feel so unbalanced when the numbers are double on their side?"

While the cast chuckled awkwardly at this observation, PD Jiyujin explained the mission.

"Today's mission is hide-and-seek across the SKS broadcasting building."
"So that's why the teams are split like this. The chasers will chase?"
"Yes, and the survivors will search for hidden video tapes around the building."

The game combined treasure hunting with hide-and-seek.

Survivors could resist being caught, but only chasers could rip off name tags.
It was going to be a high-stakes chase with 22 floors and five tapes to find.

As we strategized, one thought crossed my mind:

'If I catch Sujin, I'll just let her go. Gotta help her get some airtime.'

Meanwhile, the survivors began their strategy session.

"Sujin, you mentioned you trained, right?"
"Yes? Yeah."
"Did you practice with Donghu?"

And so, Yoo Jiseok's teasing resumed.

With Donghu gone, Sujin became the perfect target.

"Uh, yeah... Donghu's a great runner. He even said I'm good, like third level or something."
"Third level? How fast are you?"
"Three kilometers in 15 minutes."

The guys nodded in understanding, but actress Chun Suyeon tilted her head.

"...Why is that third level? For women, isn't that top tier?"
"Huh?"
"Donghu probably used male standards."

Realizing she was faster than she thought, Sujin blinked in surprise.
"I... really?!"

"Yes, that's really fast. Donghu must've been crazy fast if you thought you were slow."
"How fast is Donghu?"
"When we ran together, he did three kilometers in 10 minutes."
"What?! 10 minutes for three kilometers?!"

The entire team, except Sujin, was stunned.

"That's cheetah speed. We're doomed.

Kangsu, can't you do something with those legs of yours?"
"Hyung! Even long legs won't help with that!"

Finally, Sujin casually dropped:
"...Oh, and Donghu also won the Golden Bell quiz show, hehe."

Everyone thought the same thing.

'What is this? A boyfriend flex?'

Who are you two?