invisible string ✓

thirty

• ADVIKA •

The next thing I forced my eyes to witness was the sleek black racing car.

Except that it was next to Ishaan instead of being over him.

Ishaan, a foot away from the car, looked back at me with a relieved smile and winked at me. While I struggled to feel relief due to me crying, he gestured at me to take deep breaths in a bid to relax myself.

Gripping the wooden bench firmer, I tried to calm down momentarily while my mind— which was already in a dilemma for the past few days— had managed to make a decision amidst the chaos that prevailed over there.

The first thing he did as he came up to me was hug me like we were home, making me suffocate despite the comfort in the air. “I'm home, love.”

“Go home, love,” I whispered in his ear, not after biting my lower lip to suppress my sobs.

Breaking the hug with a perplexed frown on his face, he asked, “What do you mean?”

Looking down at the ground, I bit my lips to forbid myself from sobbing and looked back at him. “I mean it, Ishaan. You know what has happened for the past week. Forget me; I'm immune to all those hurdles. But, you? To face all this stuff cooked up by your creator? That was not a part of your package, Ishaan. You weren't destined to face them. The worst part? It was all because of me. All Hell broke loose the moment I entered your life. Yes, you had less peace even before I came into your life. Yet, you were alive. The best way to help you escape this is me—”

“Are you leaving my life?” Ishaan raised the question with an uncharacteristic tone that displayed his angst. “All Hell would break loose only when you do this. Yes, I admit that I had no peace before you. Yes, I am experiencing zero peace with you by my side. But… I would be tenfold peaceless if you leave me. Either way, I'm losing my peace. So, why not face the pain with you by my side? I would be happier that way despite experiencing shit.”

“Ishaan, do you get what you were trying to tell me?” I couldn't help but frown at what he had said, my mind scorning at him for not understanding my point of view. “If I stay by your side, you will die. You saw what happened a few seconds ago, didn't you? That woman Aadya Chatterjee would have almost grabbed your life, Ishaan.”

“That's her loss. She's the one who could potentially lose the main character of her Bestseller novel,” he retorted while shrugging as though he was being obvious.

“Not just that. I would have lost the man who brought hues of greenery in my black life. Imagine what would have happened next. I…” Unable to hold the tears stagnant, I unleashed them down my cheeks. “I would rather lose you with a hope that you're alive.”

“Advika…” His voice trembled as he had bit his lower lip and released it. “I wish that car had killed me. At least, you were there for me.” His voice trembled more as he continued, “Please don't go, Mia Anima. Stay back, baby. Please! You either stay back or leave me— only after killing me right here. I would die loving you either way. It was you who encouraged me to fight harder, didn't you?”

“I can't stay back, Ishaan!” I yelled in a few decibels louder than before and moved an inch backwards; my heart was surprised by the sudden move commanded by my head. “Yes. I did ask you to fight for us indeed. But, I wouldn't have done that if I knew it was possible at the cost of your life. You may hate me now for leaving you. But later, you'll thank me for doing this. You'd realise that I was giving you your peace.”

“But… I don't need peace. I need you,” he whispered in a voice so raspy as though something was almost blocking his throat.

“I need you as well, but… I realised that me and your mental peace can never coexist in your life.”