When the music's off and the room gets empty

Dont come out

Sitting in a living room,

With a scratchy couch,

A noisy TV,

Cicadas screaming outside,

The smell of cigar burns filling my senses—

A melody I know all too well.

I hear a call.

"I need an ambulance for an overdose."

I ignore it.

My father walks in.

"Take your sister. Don't come out, and shut up."

So, I take her to our room.

I'm quiet.

I listen closely as she sleeps beside me.

I hear the sound of sirens.

I'm quiet.

I open my phone and go to notes.

11:58—sirens.

I hear the sound of a gag.

I hear doctors asking, "What day is it?"

I hear, "He's my roommate."

Sobs wrack my body.

What is happening?

I enter timestamps.

I listen.

I stay quiet.

I see the green stretcher light,

The crayon on the wall,

The pictures of a family I thought I knew.

The sirens fade away.

My door flies open.

My father's bloodshot eyes—

He looks at me the way I look at myself.

"Go to bed."

And so, I do.

I keep quiet.

I don't come out.

I look to my sister,

The divine innocence of her face,

Hidden from the wrath of my father,

Shielded by the grace of sleep.

And I wonder,

When did I become her mother?

When did my childhood

Slip through the cracks of this house,

Lost between sirens and orders?

I raised her for a man

Who could barely raise himself,

For a father who became a shadow,

And left me to carry the weight.

I wonder,

Will she ever know?

Will she wake one day

To the melody of cicadas,

The burn of cigars,

The scream of sirens,

And know this life?

For now, I shield her.

For now, I stay quiet.

Her dreams are untouched,

But mine are filled with green lights

And fading sirens.

-August

kinda dumped my whole life story on y'all (oopsies??)

Love y'all so so much MWAH! <3