My Messed Up Story

Just guess...

So you where in town visiting your Aunt and uncle when you decided to walk down the street. There I spotted you and called out to you. I run to you and hug you because I haven't seen you in a long time. All of a sudden, some random stuff explodes in the background and a piano rolls down the street followed by a guy in a tuxedo chasing after it while being chased by a crowd with pitchforks. Then a unicorn shows up out of a crack in the cement and we stop hugging. The unicorn starts pooping everywhere. But he poops hamburgers and tacos... And then he starts peeing cheese sauce... And then Carson flies down from one of the buildings and says "run my love!" To the unicorn. Then they gallop off into the sunset. And then everything becomes like mine craft. A creeper shows up and blows everything up. And then we fall and lose a few hearts. Then a skeleton starts shooting everything so we run right into a zombie who starts eating us. And then it turns into Pokemon and I throw out a pokeball and then Tegan and Taylor are all of a sudden there. And then the zombie throws out Tyson. And then my poke pals kick him in the groin and he falls to the ground and is unable to battle and then this dude shows up and demands that we build him a fortress out of cheese to protect his royal graham crackers from Smaug the Dragon. So we build it and Smaug shows up and we stealthily get on his back and he flies to the Lonely Mountain in Erebor. Then the three Durins rush out. Kili grabs me while Fili carries you. And then Kili tried to make a move on me, and you are like "bitch no!" And you try to decapitate him, but you accidentally fall onto Bilbo. Then he screams and Smaug comes into the mountain and is like "bitch please." And everyone gets out of the mountain. And then you fall into the lake and everything is back to normal... Other than I am not there. I am getting it on with Kili back in Erebor.