Crisis (Cake AU)

Chapter 3 - Sinking

Luke's Pov

I'm sinking. I flail my arms trying to reach the surface, but I feel a weight begin to push me farther down into the dark depths of the ocean. I can't breathe. I look around searching for any possible thing that can save me. Nothing, nothing but the dark cold ocean that surrounds me. I can't hold my breath for much longer. "Help me." I whisper as I sink into the nothingness of the ocean.

I jerk away to the sound of my alarm going off. I grab the it and throw it god knows where.

"Great another day of torture," I mumble getting out of bed.

I walk over to my pile of dirty clothes and sift through them to find a clean shirt. I lift my ATL shirt from the pile and sniff it to make sure it doesn't smell, and put it on. I have given up with doing my laundry I mean what's the point? I pull on my black skinny jeans and grab my things.

Once I get downstairs I look around to see where my dad is. The room reeks of alcohol and smoke, but no sign of my dad. Oh well, probably out still drinking.

Putting on my shoes I grab the house keys and walk out the door. Turning around I fumble with the key only to succeed in dropping it.

"Shit," I mutter leaning down to pick it up.

"HEY NEIGHBOR!" I hear someone shriek from behind me.

I pick up the key and turn around to see the one and only Ashton. Locking the door I turn around to face him.

"We aren't neighbors," I say.

"Well we live in the same neighborhood so I consider you my neighbor!" He chirps.

Why is he always so goddamn happy?

"Oh okay. Well anyway what are you doing outside of my house?" I ask getting slightly pissed off with he's peppy attitude.

"I was just waiting so we could walk to the bus stop together!" He says with a giant grin on his face.

"Oh okay," I murmur.

After an awkward walk to the bus stop with Ashton mostly babbling about something I didn't bother listening to, the bus pulls up. I slowly go to the back of the herd getting on to the bus hoping to lose Ashton so I won't have to sit next to him.

Once the bus pulls up to the school I jump out of my seat and get off the bus making sure to avoid eye contact with anyone I see. I open my locker and begin to take out my books.

"Hey freak," I hear Mason say slamming the locker shut in front of me.

"What do you want?" I say barley audible.

"What was that? Finally excepted the fact that you should kill yourself?" He sneers all his friends laughing behind him.

I try to push past them but Mason shoves me and pushes me against the locker.

"Where do you think you are going?" Mason growls tightening his grip on my neck.

I squirm trying to get out of his grip. I look around hoping someone will help me but everyone just looks the other way.

"Leave him alone!" I hear someone scream.

Mason lets go of me and I fall to the ground gasping for air.

"This isn't over," Mason says kicking me in the stomach and walking away, his posse following in pursuit.

I look up to see Ashton rush over to me.

"Oh my god. Are you okay?" He asks me.

"I'm fine," I get up pushing past him.

"Wait!" I hear Ashton say.

I don't listen and run into the bathroom. I go into the stall, locking the door behind me. I slide down the door sitting on the ground. I rummage through my bag trying to find something sharp. I feel the cold metal hit my skin and automatic relief rushes over me.

I pull out the razor blade that I have been keeping in my bag for times like this. I push the metal against my skin and move it across my wrist seeing a thin line of blood follow it. I grab some toilet paper and wrap it around my wrist. I slowly get up and feel my legs shaking.

Grabbing my bag I turn around and go to open the stall door but a sign plastered on the back of the door catches my eye.

If you are struggling with abuse, bullying, depression, thoughts of suicide, and self harm and see no way out, we are there for you. Call this number to discuss any issues you may be struggling at home, work or school.

I see underneath the post are these strips of paper with the number on it. I grab one shoving it into my bag, and walk out the stall. I hear the second bell ring which means I am going to be late to class. Great.

------After School-----

I walk towards the buses, as people shove their way past me and talk obnoxiously loud to their friends.

I step onto the bus and nod to the bus driver who nods back.

"Luke! Sit here!" Ashton says pointing to the seat next to him.

I act like I don't hear him and sit down behind the bus driver.

As I get off the bus I hear Ashton calling my name. I continue to ignore him and plug my headphones in turning the volume up, tuning Ashton out.

I unlock the door and walk inside being greeted by the stench of alcohol and cigarettes. I take of my shoes and begin to walk up the stairs.

I hear a floor board creek, "Where do you think you are going?" My dad growls.

"Upstairs to do my homework," I say avoiding eye contact.

"I just got a call from your teachers about your grades." He says glaring at me.

He begins to walk up the stairs until he is standing right in front of me.

"You are a disappointment to me and I'm sure your mother would be just as disappointed in you," I cringe smelling alcohol on his breath.

"I'm sorry," I stutter.

I feel him slap me across the face.

"Look at me when I am talking to you, you piece of shit," He yells.

I put my hand to my face and feel a welt beginning to form from where he had just slapped me. I look up at him, the man I no longer recognize. This isn't my dad. This isn't the dad I knew. This isn't the father that taught me how to ride a bike and said prayers with me before I went to bed. This person is a stranger to me, a monster.

"Go in your room, and don't come out. I don't want to see you, you disgust me," He spats.

I turn around and run down the hallway. I open the door and quickly close it behind me. I sink down pulling my knees to my chest. I feel tears beginning to fall down my face.

Why can't I do anything right. Why have I pushed Ashton away. Why did mum have to die. I take out the tiny strip of my paper from my bag with the phone number on it. I crumple it up and throw it in the garbage. Laying down on my bed I stare at the ceiling. Maybe I should do it. Maybe I should just listen to what everyone has been telling me to do.

Maybe I should kill myself.

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Author's Note

OH MY GOD I AM SORRY. I HAVE BEEN SO DISTRACTED LATELY. I TRIED TO MAKE THIS UPDATE EXTRA LONG FOR ALL OF YOU BECAUSE I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN LIKE FOREVER. Anyway how have you all been? Go to any rowyso concerts? I went to one on September 1. It was like the best night of my life. 5SOS FOLLOWED ME ON TWITTER WHEN I WAS ON LINE GETTING MERCH AND I LIKE DIED. Oh my what just came over me right there. Anywhoo I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and please favorite it! Love you!!!