Seven | Part Three of Goodbye, Emmi

The Biggest Decision

My heart neither sank not jumped when I got the call. I knew it could be good news.

Or it could be devastating news.

"Hello?" I cleared my throat.

"Colette?"

"Dr. Litski, hi!" I said.

"Hi. We... We have to talk ." He said.

That's when my heart sank.

"Uh huh..." I started.

"How about you and Shay come down to the hospital? Just for a an hour or two." His voice quivered. That's not good.

Shay and I drove as fast as possible and raced into Dr. Litski's office.

"Alright." Dr. Litski said as we sat down. "We need to discuss something."

"Ok..." I nodded.

"Let me just start off by saying what I am going to say, is completely up to you. This is your decision. But... So, chances of waking up from a coma completely healthy are rare. Chances of a waking up from a coma with brain injuries are more likely. Now here's the bad news: chances of an infant waking up from a coma... At all... Is rare. In all my years, I've never witnessed a young child wake up completely healthy from a coma. We usually wait a week or two to have this talk with family. If the infant does not wake up from the coma within two weeks, which is the time Quinn has been in one, we need to start thinking about other options."

"And?" Shay said, his voice shaky.

"As a parent myself, I know that I wouldn't ever want to be in your position, and I want to give my complete condolences to you, I am so sorry this is something you have to go through. But..." He paused. "We can't let the elephant in the room live there. There is a chance, God forbid, Quinn never wakes up. And unfortunately, that chance is much greater then her waking up. We can let her stay in this coma... Or, with your permission, we... Can take her off life support." He rubbed his palms together and his face grew weary.

"You mean... She'll die?" Shay asked, in shock.

"If taken off life support, she will pass, but she will be surrounded by family and it will be painless. We don't give this option unless necessary because we make sure we do everything in our capacity to keep the patient healthy. But times like this, when chances of survival are slim, we have to give family the option."

  I blinked away a heavy tear. "Let me... Let me just talk to Shay." I whispered, my voice a mere squeak. "I need to get some air."

-------------

This is painful to write cuz I babysit a four year old named Quinn and I keep picturing her in this situation :(