Deconstructing Bridges

Chapter Thirty-One

Most of the flames had been extinguished, though the building continued to billow copious amounts of smoke. There was a large crowd that had gathered behind the blockages that had been put in place to keep the immediate area clear for the police and the fire engines. Residents huddled together in their robes and pyjamas, a few sleeping babes were cradled in the arms of their curious parents and although it was now close to midnight, there were many young excited children pointing at the bright lights of the emergency vehicles, some of which had already arrived on the scene by the time Matthew and Rose had burst out of the building on the heels of the others. Freddie Marshall had promptly been ushered into a car and driven away under guard, and now there was nothing more to do but wait. Once the smoke was under relative control, the bomb squad would go in to clear the building of any further danger. As the firemen continued to aim their hoses at the building, Rose watched from the curb on the opposite side of the road.

Her feet were clad only in her black socks after she'd sheepishly handed her shoes over to Hayley. Perhaps they could use the recording of the pseudo-confession in court. Perhaps not. It, like so many things, was out of her hands now. She'd been given a scratchy woollen blanket and a bottle of water for her dry throat, and she'd already almost finished the whole thing. Matthew stood a few metres away speaking to his boss, while Eddie and Hayley remained close. Rose observed the way Hayley's hand rested gently against Eddie's arm, but he eventually shrugged it off and she had to roll her eyes. Those two were even more hopeless than she was. Turning her attention back to her husband she examined his profile wistfully. He usually seemed so strong yet now he appeared almost defeated - weak from the smoke, from his concussion, from the fear that he could very well lose his job for his actions tonight. She thought about the several times she had come close to losing him in the past forty-eight hours, from the apartment blast and Marshall's assault of him, to the explosion here, to seeing him on the verge of self-destruction. There was so much blame to direct towards herself. She had drawn him into her tangled past and her uncertain future, and yet somehow he still loved her. Perhaps the part she was most regretful about was the fact that it had taken this for her to openly admit her love for him, even if she had long ago recognised it herself.

It was over. The nightmare was over. Not because Marshall had been brought to justice, not because her family were any less dead, but because she'd finally admitted that there was something she cared about more than the fate of a man who had destroyed so many lives in the interest of self-preservation.

Huh. I guess Matt's 'deconstruction' of me was successful after all.

"What are you thinking about?" Matthew lowered his body to sit beside her, handing her another bottle of water which she gratefully accepted and twisted open. She looked over at him, his shadowed, haunted eyes. She knew that he had to be torturing himself. He was not built for revenge, no matter how he tried to convince himself otherwise. She was used to living in darkness, but she knew him. In the line of police work he'd had to face some horrific sides to humanity, but he'd never been drawn so closely to it himself before. She knew that some time soon it was going to hit him even harder. He didn't look away, and eventually she cleared her throat, looping her arm around his as she inclined her head towards the bustling scene before them.

"I was just thinking that some of these firemen are alright," she murmured and he looked at her incredulously.

"Are you serious?"

"Sure," she blinked in innocence.

"That one over there, for example." She gestured over to a man standing nearby who was removing his mask and wiping the sweat from his face.

"Even with that bulky suit, you can tell there's a fine body under there. I'll bet his skin is just glistening with sweat too. Wait until he takes his entire suit off to cool down."