GAMBIT - Vinsmoke Ichiji x Reader

14 - Appetite

***(Y/N) POV***

"Sit yourself up straight!"

I winced as my mother hissed, nudging me in the ribs a little too aggressively beneath the table for the third time. Immediately, I straightened my posture, even though it seemed to make the pain in my chest worsen. No, it wasn't due to my posture at all. It was the fact that Ichiji was seated directly across from me at the dining table.

He was the same as always. Stoic, still, unbothered. Was this unyielding pain just affecting me? If that was the case it was totally unfair. Maybe I had actually just contracted some exotic strain of aggressive, terminal disease? That would have been far more preferable.

To avoid allowing my gaze to remain on Ichiji, lest my hatred intensified my pain, I let my eyes wander around the table. Reiju seemed to be subtly studying everyone as she silently ate, which wasn't anything new.

Niji was just jabbing the meal before him with his fork, his nose scrunching in barely contained disgust. He'd always been such a picky eater, which was probably why he was such a lanky prick compared to his buffer prick brothers. I hoped he'd eventually take a bite so he'd potentially choke.

Yonji, however, wasn't shovelling food into his gullet like he normally would have been. Instead, he was absently staring off into space with a dazed look on his eye and a small smile on his face. It was obvious why, at least to me. He was thinking about Laoise. It was incredibly jarring to see him this way, because I had always been under the impression that Vinsmokes were some strange, exotic species that couldn't feel emotions.

No, as if. Maybe they're robots? Or just straight up evil? Yeah. That sounds more likely.

"I must say, Judge, your quick thinking really saved us the other night. If you hadn't had your scientific contraptions to snuff out that wildfire, then we would have lost so much more of the forest." My father spoke up, and I immediately turned to analyse the head Vinsmoke's expression.

"Oh, no trouble at all, my friend! We all know how sacred nature is, and I couldn't bear to see it be destroyed." Judge was definitely putting on an act, and a poor one at that as he placed a hand on my father's shoulder. "Such a horrible shame that it still burned so much..."

How can people be falling for this? Like..? Are they stupid? Do I come from a royal line of morons? The fuck?

"Oh, for the love of everything, (Y/N), sit up straight!" Again, my mother nudged me in the side, sounding more exasperated, and I complied despite the harsh ache. Refocusing on my plate, I felt nauseous. My appetite had abandoned me shortly after I had rejected Ichiji, and I could only force myself to eat so much.

Unsure why I did so, I glanced to Ichiji's plate and found that he had also hardly touched his dinner. He was simply parting the food with his fork and kind of pressing it down to make it appear partially eaten. Allowing my eyes to travel further up, I spied my reflection in his shades, and whilst I couldn't be certain due to the tint, I was sure he was looking directly at me.

There was no stopping the slight flinch that accompanied the sharp pang of pain, deep inside of my chest, and I quickly set my cutlery down.
"M..May I please me excused..? I'm not feeling all too well." I asked my mother quietly, and whilst she gave me one of her unimpressed looks, she nodded.

Murmuring my thank you, I got up from my seat and left the dining hall, making sure I got around the first hallway corner at least before I caught myself on the wall with one hand, the other moving to grip the fabric of my shirt over my chest.

This couldn't be permanent, right? I was pretty certain at this point that my open rejection of Ichiji was the cause, but how was that fair? Why should I be given no choice in my own fate? I hated him, with all my heart, so why should I have to choose between suffering as his future wife or this constant agony?