Follow the Green

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Chapter 3
June 10 (around 7:25)
    Omg diary, what ever shall I do? My family is  falling apart. A downward spiral happening much faster than I assumed it would! I wonder if anyone realizes what it's like having a Sheriff come to your house every other week. I wonder why my mother stays. She's just setting a bad example for my future and she believes I will follow in her footsteps. I don't like to think about my future, even if I tried I just can't. I always get a sick feeling in my stomach when I even try to think about it. I always find myself getting off topic, usually because I have so much on my mind. I wonder what would happen if I just cleared my mind. My mother says if I got out more my head wouldn't be filled so much. What does she know? Oh yea, she also said my explanation of the kids at the group was the perfect definition of me! What the hell mom! I gotta go to school now and take my last test , I'm really scared English isn't my cup of tea. I'm not the best writer.
    I realize it's now 7:34, the bus comes at 7:37 so I quickly throw my diary underneath my bed and run out the door. Luckily I make it there just in time. The bus is up the block. I'm out of breath and the other kids are staring at me. What are you looking at? I wish to say that to them but I'm too afraid. I'm overwhelmed and stressed out. My teacher always says There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you. She recites that from Maya Angelou. We learned about her in school, she was a writer from the soul my teacher would say. Ms.Lentines was an African American woman surrounded by many white teachers. Maya Angelou was also African American
and she was named one of the 30 most powerful women in America. Ms. L was a role model to me. She was bright smart and enthusiastic about what she teaches. She always told me I had something special in me. She called me her wondering soul. She said I could be just like Maya, my writing is pretty amazing. I've never had a teacher give me so much affection.
   I looked out the old scratched window of the nasty yellow bus until the bus makes a quick stop at a random place. We never stop here, why are we stopped here? It was like a tourist attraction and the kids on the bus were the tourists. Everyone stood up to see this kid come on the bus, not me though I still looked out the window.
   "Mind if I sit here" said the boy

    That voice sounds familiar but all I said was                          "Sure" and didn't turn my head, I don't like people sitting next to me. Personal bubbles are some things people don't understand.

   " So what final are you taking today ?" God damn-it that voice sounds so familiar , I have to look , just a quick glance. I slowly glance and see the kid that was a jerk in the hall. We meet eye to eye and I just roll my eyes, "Oh I'm sorry let me start over, I'm Christopher and I didn't mean to be rude the other day. What's your name?"

I didn't answer for a short moment, why is he trying again? Should I bother to answer? That scoundrel I'll give you one shot. Softly I mumbled " My name is Cynthia , Cynthia Rose."

"That's a beautiful name fit for a beautiful girl Cynthia Rose" he smirked at me and was getting something out of his bag, it was a necklace, a necklace with a locket that was empty. "I wanted to start on the right foot Cynthia so I got you a little gift"

I found myself perking up like a dog when he finds some treats. "Oh thanks" I acted like I didn't care when inside I was dying to hug him. I've never felt so happy before.

"So what final are you taking today?"

"English, what about-"

"Hey same here! We can walk in together!"

"Cool, hey how did you get on this bus if you don't live around here? It's not a bad thing I'm just wondering cause this is a new stop for the last day of school."

"Oh I uhh.." He blushed and was hesitant, "I saw the bus number you got on then I went to the office and got the bus stop schedule and I went to the very last one, there wasn't any kids ever that's why it was new."
At age fourteen please don't tell me my life is turning around for the better? Actually please tell me that it is. I need warm, welcoming arms. But why me Christopher, can I call you Chris? I thought to myself, Or maybe even handsome? I laughed to myself and I noticed he was giggling with me too.
We reached school and we walked to take the gymnasium for our final. We wished each other good luck and sat down to begin the exam.

** ** **
The doorknob was cold and the candles in the front windowed struggled to stay on , just like I struggled to stay alive . I'm lucky I have my thoughts and my diary , I quickly pulled out my keys and unlocked the door. It was quiet so I snuck up to my bedroom. Where was my family ? It's only 4 PM. I ran upstairs to log in my diary.
June 10th
I NEVER WRITE TWICE BUT I AM TODAY. I HUNG OUT WITH CHRISTOPHER. WE WENT TO THE PARK AND HAD A PICNIC. Okay capital letters annoys me and they make me aggravated. What's happening diary? Am I finding love before I even find a friend? It's only been like 2 days and the first day was hell. Today was amazing ! He freaking made sure he got on my bus! Why can't you answer me! Should I call him right now? No no I'm too boy crazy. What's happening to me diary? Where's the anxiety to talk to boys and people? Why don't I have it with him but I have with everyone else. Maybe he won't like me
because of my anxiety , maybe his family won't like me. Maybe I won't even be seen by his family . He's so dreamy, his eyes are beautiful, he has this smirk that's adorable. He's adorable ! Wow am I in love ?
    My family came home around 7 and we sat down to have dinner. I found myself never shutting up. My dad asked me if I had a motor on my mouth. I laughed it off but honestly I couldn't stop. Nothing could take my mind off today and Christopher. All through dinner we went around the table talking about our days. Mom and dad went to work, my sister went to the beach with her friends. As they were all explaining I couldn't wait to describe my day. Finally it was my turn, let's just say I went on all through "desert" as well. We don't even have desert!
    My mother asked me why I was so talkative , I told her in simply one word boys. She got real excited at that fact. She got real excited on how energetic and enthusiastic I was. Then I realized Cynthia Rose's aka my life might be changing for the better. Do boys do that to you? Drive you crazy and break you free of all your heart ache and problems. Chris you're my savior.