Starting Over Anderson || ✔

Fifteen: Heartbreak

106 days A.D.

I remember clearly those days, when it was only me and Keith and Rachel. Things were easier back then, without the complications of growing up and falling in love.

To say I'm nostalgic is the understatement of the year.

Every fibre of me longs to go back to that era, especially when I meet Liliana Jacobson, the girl who was brought in to replace me. She's everything I'm not - curvy, girly, blonde, tall - and most importantly, she is Sam's ex, the one who sent him to depression. I'm eaten away by jealousy once I am told of her true identity. No wonder Rach and Keith had tried to hide it from me.

Our meeting is inevitable though, I always knew that. I finally get to see her in person and in all her gloriousness when I'm over at Keith's during my break time. She's just as how my best friends had described - all pretty leggy blonde - but her beauty times ten.

Yeah, that bad.

It doesn't help that I've seen more of Bob's four-year-old grandson than Sam (and that's saying a lot because Bob is rarely ever at the diner and on the rare occasion when he does stop by, rarely brings little Tim along). I can see that he's infatuated by Liliana once again. The signs are evident in his eyes.

My heart breaks like a million diamonds.

It is then that I come to realize that if I don't make a move sooner, Sam will be completely gone. Or, at least that's what Rach and Keith had convinced me. Their words ring true. I cannot bear the thought of losing Sam, because even though we haven't been hanging out much, it doesn't mean that I think of him less. 

Which is why I'm pacing said boy's driveway, trying to muster enough courage to execute my elaborate plan. Or, rather, Rach and Keith's elaborate plan. Screw it. I bring my hand to a knuckle and knock at the door. 

The door swings open to reveal a flushed looking Mrs Parker in floral nightgown. I don't blame her - it's ten p.m., probably her bedtime.

"Hi Mrs Parker, is Sam around?" I greet politely, fixing up a killer smile. Well I hope it is killer.

She stifles a yawn and smiles back. "Unfortunately, he's not back yet, dear. Why don't you come in?"

I accept her offer and eventually she tells me to just wait for him in his room. He won't take long to get back now, according to Mrs Parker. I thank her again as she shows me the way to his room.

Upon entering, I'm taken aback by the tidiness. Very unlike Keith's. Mrs Parker leaves me to get back to bed, I presume, so I take a little look around. It's not everyday you get to snoop around your crush's room. I make sure to keep everything back where it was so that it doesn't give me away. He has a few Green Day and Muse posters tacked up on his wall and a picture of him and his family on his desk. He owns an alarming thrity-seven novels (I'm also surprised that he reads) and a collection of poems by Robert Frost. He has twenty pencils, nine blue pens, three black pens, two erasers and a ruler on his shelf. He has a sizeable wardrobe filled with various band shirts and single colored tees and five dressy shirts. When I've looked around enough, I settle down on his soft velvet bed. Subconsciously, I reach for his pillow, hugging it to my face and inhaling his masculine scent. God, I sound so much like a stalker.

Something glints in my peripheral vision. I stop hugging the pillow and turn to examine something that had been under the pillow. A silver notebook.

My heart rate rises immensely. Could this be Sam's secret diary? I mean, he keeps it under his pillow, it must be of some degree of secretness.