I don't 2 (Raura)

19: The Journal Part 1

"Rocky. Wh-what are you doing here?"

"I'll tell you later, let's go" He picked me up and put me in the backseat, then drove off. Ellington was in the passenger seat. He turned around to me

"Laura, are you OK?"

"No, he raped me..... Well at least he tried to"

"What do you mean tried to? Who?"

"James... It's like he couldn't do it. He was about to but then he just.... Stopped"

"He was trying to scare you. But don't worry, you're with us now" Ell gave me a reassuring smile them turned back around

"How did you guys know I was here?"

"We didn't" Rocky said. "We thought Ross was here but when we arrived he was nowhere to be found. We decided to stay for a while until he came out" Ellington turned back around to face me

"Yea, and good thing we stayed right"

"Riker told me that Ross has been suicidal since you've been gone. He thinks it's his fault. But it's not, its James fault" Rocky said as he focused on the road. Little did he know that it actually was my fault. If I didn't cheat on Ross, I wouldn't never met James and we wouldn't be in this situation. Well actually..... I would've still meet James, but this wouldn't have happened

"So Laura did you know this guy personally or was the kidnapping just... Random?"

"It was um... Random, yea random" I lied, I wanted to get rid of all memory of me cheating on Ross. "Are you taking me home?"

"Yup, you'll be with Ross and Araura in no time" oh my god Araura. How did Araura handle this? Does she even know what happened? I would ask Rocky and Ell but they don't know what happened either

"Here" Ell said as he gave me a small blanket. "Just relax" I nodded and cuddled up into the blanket. After a while I noticed myself falling asleep

****

Ross' POV

I told my self I wouldn't do it, but I did. I read Laura's journal. It was about 5 pages in the book listing my pros and cons. Way more cons than pros. But the cons had dumb stuff in it, so I think she just wanted a reason to cheat on me. It said stuff like he leaves his shoes by the door, we don't go on enough dates, he can barely pick up Araura because he's working. Things like that, that made the cons list long. After reading that list I found a paragraph:

Ross obviously isn't enough for me, James is the one I want but I can't divorce Ross. He may not be enough but he's something. But I'm not sure if I love James, so that's another reason why I can't leave Ross. Also Araura wouldn't want that. Ross either, I'll just keep this a secret until is time

If you read other pages you can see how Laura slowly feel in love with James. They've been together for about a year until I found out. That's it. I don't love Laura. I can't love this woman, I shouldn't. God what am I saying, of course I love Laura. I will never stop loving her, but I need to move on. I put the journal back into Laura's night stand, locked it, and put the key back under the lamp. At the moment, I was sitting at my work desk in my room. Loaded gun in my hand, contemplating on what I should do. Yes, I was planning to kill myself. So many reasons not to but so many more to do so. But reasons not to we're much more stronger, but at the same time reasons why I should couldn't get out of my mind. I took a deep breathe. Tears were coming out of my eyes. You know what, fuck it. It's time to end it. I can't take it any more. I raised the gun up to my head, breathing heavily and crying loudly. I was going to pull the trigger until I heard the door bell ring. I can't answer it now, if I don't kill myself now, then I won't do it later. Or maybe it's a sign that I shouldn't kill myself. Maybe I have hope. I got up and slowly limped down the steps. Wiping away all my tears on my way down. I would yell to say 'I'm coming' but my throat hurt too much from crying. As I reached the door some one began knocking hard. I opened the door to find Rocky with Laura in his hands and Ellington behind them