The sound of dripping water from our backyard wakes me up again at 2:30. Every day is always like this. But something is different today.
I grab my phone just to confirm the time. It's 2:33. For a morning person like me, this is WAY too EARLY. Damn this course. It ruins my body clock.
I get up to turn on the lights of my small bedroom. I ready myself to continue what I was doing last night. I get my notebook and pen, and I start remembering what I was...
"What was I writing about last night?"
I have found the page. But... a cold feeling struck me. Making me froze and then goosebumps. She's here.
"Finally! You tried to see me."
I am seeing her again. Her hair is a bit different than the last time I saw her. Her beautiful black hair then is now dyed with brown at the top and... I think her hair at the end has been bleached. Just like what I did to my hair. Her dimples have been visible when she smiles at me. Her big round eyes is like shining and really shows she's happy that we meet again. She's wearing white dress like she always does. She gained weight... I guess.
I ignore her remark and continue to assess her appearance. She's close to me as she is standing right before my closet.
"Staring is rude. I already know that I'm pretty. So have you-"
"You gained weight."
Her eyes widen in shock and her mouth opens a little. She's fun to tease. After a while, she composes her self.
"It's your fault I became like this."
"But you're cute."
She stops and smiles at me again.
"Well thank you. Can I sit beside you?"
I tap the space of my bed beside me. I put my feet on the bed and make an indian sit.
"I'm so fucking twisted."
I said that because of what I have written last night. I want to tear it but I don't want to. A part of me tells me that what I wrote is true.
I'm not insane. I'm not self-centered and attention seeker type of a person. I'm not that stupid to sacrifice anything for others.
"That's really you."
She's reading everything I wrote last night.
"You think so?"
I look at her. She's smiling at me.
"Yes. Everyone is crazy. You're not the only one. Everybody have their own battles within themselves. Principles. Wants. Beliefs. There would be a time that you'll face that kind of dilemma wherein what you should do, which you should follow and what you should protect in order to face the reality - all collides."
I find myself nodding to what she's saying. I don't talk 'cause I know that she has more to say.
"Sometimes what you thought a plausible solution is the craziest thing because our society tells you. The society set the norms you should follow. You're normal if you followed their rules. Otherwise, you're not."
My eyes are starting to close. I'm sleepy because of her voice. I still want to listen to every opinion she has.
"You're sleepy. You should sleep more to get taller."
She chuckles as she gently takes my notebook away from me. She arrange the pillows and blanket and help me lie down.
"Hey. Are you making fun of me?"
"No 'cause you know that's the truth."
She pats my head as she tries to put me to sleep. But I don't want to.
"Can you talk to me until I fall asleep?
"Of course."
She talks and talks as I slowly fall to slumber.
