Chagall's Daydream *EDITING

Hallucinations

I could still see him, even in my resting state. The poor guy, he was still running away; he'd gotten about 17 miles or so away from the house in a matter of about 15 minutes. God, I forgot how fast Master was. You could tell he was he was a young vampire, for sure...

Anyways, though I couldn't physically be with him, I was still following him. 

I'd left my corporeal form behind to gather energy from the events from earlier. Sure, Master Alix wouldn't be able to see me - that was kinda the point - but I'm still thinking that he could feel my presence. Maybe that's why he's still running....

God, I really hope that he doesn't do anything stupid. Though I'd be able to alert one of his friends back home if he did, I still didn't have enough raw energy or stored power to stop him by other means.

It's really almost funny in its own sadistic way. The first, er, previous time Alix had fed on me like this, he'd acted out in a very similar way. They say ectoplasm is reminiscent of a sort of hallucinogenic or psychedelic drug, like acid or DMT.

It apparently drives the user into an insane burst of rage, and it can't be stopped till the chemical wears off.  Other captives have told me that it's super strong stuff, strong enough to drive a good lot of users mad, and the fact that spirit entities can have the stuff running through them and not have similar effects is nothing short of a miracle in the eyes of those who've seen it in use.

Oh God, if he's really been tripping like that....

No! He couldn't possibly be! Maybe similar to that, but never that bad! I remember the first time Master Alix fed off of me; Evan had found him a few days after the fact bleeding out behind a crack house. Of course, he didn't remember anything, and we just passed it of as MAster getting in a fight or something and hitting his head too hard. Though now the plasm theory is proving to be more and more plausible. I really do hope that he's okay right now.

The poor man's body was shaking so badly, and he was sobbing so hard that he was actually choking a little. How he managed to stay upright and in motion was beyond me. It must be a vampire thing, like extreme balance or co ordination or something.

Whatever, I shouldn't be thinking like this right now. It's just killing me right now, that I can't really help him at all.

I need him to be okay! If he's happy, then I'm happy; that's the way it's been since he saved me. I just want to descend and solidify so bad right now it physically hurts. Just to hold him so tight, to reassure hi that I'm doing okay now and that though it may take a little while to regain full trust, I forgive him.

I've been really worried about him for quite some time now, actually.  He's been acting pretty strange around me for a few months and it's really bothering me. Alix.... I don't really know, he's just been so anxious and even the slightest mistake sends him into a panic attack. Only around me, though.... I kinda got a taste of that when I passed through him to rush outside in blind fear.

I don't know why, but when I meld with someone else's body I can overhear their thoughts in a way. I only got a split second of it with him but I kinda got the brief idea that he's really nervous around me. I guess that it's a sort of accidental, temporary possession. That's the best way I can describe it.

I really wish I knew what he was thinking right now. I can't find out right now, but I really want to know. Hopefully he's doing okay...

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Ahhh fuck! He-he can't be following me, not right now! DAMN IT! Ahh, it's already setting in. Shit, he can't see me like this! I had to give in, I just fucking had to! I--

AHHHHH!

It felt like every single cell of my body was on fire. It hurt so bad but at the same time it felt so good. My body was growing weak, my heart rate was dropping rapidly but at the same time it felt like I was going to have a heart attack, it was beating so fast. Blindingly bright colours flashed before my eyes, causing me to stumble back into... Manny? No, it couldn't be him, It's clearly Martha! No, no it's not! They aren't...

It was euphoria and depression at the same time. Panic and bliss. A loss of control and being in complete control. In short, heaven and hell colliding inside of my head, sharing control of my thoughts and emotions and at the same time battling for control.

My veins felt like they were filled with molten lead, ready to tear out of my flesh and onto the flooded streets below, but I also felt as light as a feather, like I could just jump up a little and be in flight. I could Kevin one day, and we could flat away together. Oh, that'd be nice!

I could feel my body seize up suddenly and my body dropped to the ground. The flood of memories and the sea of nothingness that filled my brain made me want to dig my hands into my head and tear my brain out, anything to make it stop! But did I want it to stop? Yes of course! But then again-- NO! Everything was playing out before my eyes as is I was dying, but of course I didn't get any of the good memories.

It all happened at once. My creation, initiation and later banishment. The years of torture I'd endured for the secrets of my old world. All the failed attempts to created that damned machine over the years. Meeting my best friend, sat nervously in the interview room while I condescendingly took notes on him. Later witnessing his death through steel bars and paying for his resurrection. Dropping the only key to his collar down the drain, and enduring the next few grueling days of him wailing just down the hall. Walking in to him accidentally shoving a knife through his throat just to get the damn thing off his neck.

My first trip...

My high pitched, warbling screams echoed back and forth off of the towering glass tombstones erected haphazardly around me. Their jagged bases sat only a few inches from my blood drenched, trembling body, yet they were also miles away. The echos grew in volume and occurrence with each passing second, yet I couldn't hear them at all. A sickly sweet sense of euphoria washed over me suddenly, but the terror was still very much present.

The towering headstones suddenly shattered, extremely slowly and as fast as a lightning strike. Their shards rained down over my both burning hot and blindingly cold body in pellets like thick honey. The drops crept over my body like a group of angry ants, digging under my skin and burrowing into my skull. My horribly puffed up hands flew up to my temples and my fingernails dug deep into my head, trying to get the horrible creatures out.

My screams turned to maniacal laughter as I neared my climax. It was just too much! I-I can't do it anymore! Flashed of purple and white filled my vision, and in the distance the silhouette of a man was running at me. I scrambled backwards, unable to control the wretched laughter leaving my mouth. I could feel my the pressure in my head steadily rising. Tonight could've lasted 5 minutes, or several hundred years. It was too difficult to comprehend at the moment, and possibly beyond now.

The man was so close now, along with the feeling of my head exploding. My vision was blackening along the edges, only leaving enough space for me to helplessly watch the figure barrel towards me at inhuman speeds. 5 feet away or 5 miles, I wasn't sure. The one thing that I was sure of was that this was quite possibly the end of me.

As my vision slowly closed in on itself to a sweet, blissful black sea of nothingness, the man slowly began to melt before my eyes like candle wax. The thick drops of liquid fell to the razor blades of grass in the street like blood and tar. This whole experience, it was--