Could it be helped

Games that leave pain.

When you were little did you ever play games? Were they any fun? Were they twisted? Who created them? Were they in your head or from a friend?

Mine was a game I called " React." I would run into the forest and pretend to be lost. Waiting for someone to react. I would sit there until night, often I would get too lonely and walk home. The game was never won but it still was my favorite.

This is when I became the thing I hate. Alone. I didn't mind it, it was always there to comfort me.

I became my own family, only relying on myself. I wouldn't tell my friends much about myself just that I like to explore and they were okay with that. We were kids after all.

I think I understand now though...Sometimes when we are suffering we can not be comforted.

Its almost as though the suffering is tearing us apart but we must not think of it as an excuse. We are weak, we are humans. And because of that we need the pain to understand who we are.

Without pain what would we become, nothing. If someone were to comfort us, we could not grow, we would be of no use.

The only way we can become ourselves is to be alone with ourselves for an amount of time. Who are we when we are alone? No masks, no pretending, just yourself. Does it make you sad or glad?

It makes me feel neither. I have always been alone and always been fine with that.

In a crowd of people I sit and observe, you can find a lot out by watching. People talk different ways, or their facial expressions change to reflect certain meanings. Look up what facial reactions mean and body language, you will find yourself understanding a lot more.

Random as always,

Boy.