Don't let go

Chapter 5

We got a booth near the back of the restaurant with the waiter at our heels. I slid into a seat while Ethan sat in the one in front of me.

"My name is Sara" she points to her name tag "what would you like to order" Sara said in a rather annoyed tone. Without looking at the menu I ordered a chicken sandwich with no tomatoes and a side of onion rings. This was my usual order every time we came here. I remembered the plump woman who served us every time. She would say "one day we're gonna run all out of chicken sandwiches" then my dad would gasp dramatically wile I dissolved into a fit of giggles.

I was brought back to reality by Sara snapping her fingers at my face "What drink would you like" she said rolling her eyes at me. "Um...uh a water pleas" I said as a blush coved my face. I glanced at Ethan to see him looking at me with a hint of amusement in his eyes.

I wonder what he found amusing

He placed his order as I looked down at my fingers in my lap.

After our food got here we spent the rest of the time talking about things from our food to arguing about what might be at the end of the rainbow. After dinner Ethan asked me if I could see I movie with him and I agreed. Also trying to ignore how similar this is to an actual date.

Which it's not

Just two friends hanging out. Wait . We're we actually friends?. I guess it could be nice having a friend. But why would he want to be friends with me. From what I've gathered so far I'm not even close to as near perfection as he is. Not to mention I'm the school Freak.

I shook the these thought from my head deciding for once to not overthink.

🕙

At the end of of the movie we filed out of the theater trying to ignore the unusual amout of couples cuddling, and much rather publicly making out. I tried to suppress the memories of the the last time I had been here. I avoided going to the movies for a fairly long time until now. Once we got out of the theater I felt the cool October air hit me. Unconsciously moved closer to Ethan as we walked back to his car.

We were enveloped in silence as we entered the very expensive car. I tried to come up with a conversation. "Where do you live?" he asked looking at me expectedly. My eyes widened in realization of what mum would do if she found out I went out with a friend, or her reaction to this car dropping me off at the apartments.

Our apartment was not as good to look at on the outside as on the inside. And It obviously wasn't a safe place to live. Suddenly I was panicked for a whole different reason. "You could just take me back to Taco Bell and I could walk home from there". I replied

A worried expression set over his beautiful features "You can't walk home." He said. Looking forward. I frowned at his response. "I'll walk home if I feel like it" I paused"which I do, you can either take me to Taco Bell or leave me here"

"No I didn't mean it that way. I'm just-" he ran his hand through his hair. "It's really late and its not safe for you to walk home wile it's dark" Ethan said"

"Well I'm pretty sure I can take care of myself" I said crossing my hands across my chest.

"How about I drop you off a few houses from where you live." Well, I guess he figured I didn't want him to see the conditions of where I live so I silently agreed to his offer.

We drove in silence as I told him to stop around a corner from the apartment building. "Thank you" I whispered giving him a small smile as I got out of the car. He seemed confused as to why I would be thanking him.

I walked around the corner then ran to the apartment building, hurrying up the stairs to the second floor. I first listened for any signs mum might be home. After hearing nothing I unlocked the door walking in then locking it after me.

  Cheap broken alcohol bottles littered the floor along with a few cigarette butts. There was a puddle of what I would guess to be vomit next to the trash can. The couch was ripped even more and there was a noticeable dent in the wall. Mum probably had 'friends' over again. I made my way to the small hallway leading to my room. Closing the door behind me I sighed as I collapsed on my unmade bed.

The door abruptly swing open. Making my jump in fear. Mother stormed inside her eyes bloodshot and teeth blaring. She had mascara running down her cheeks and her lipstick was smudged. I backed over the bed till my back hit the wall. "You bitch!" She yelled coming closer to me. I pressed my back in the wall and hugged my knees tightly to my chest. "You think you're so much better than me hun"my heart raced out of my chest as she wrapped her hands around my ankle her nails digging into my skin. "Well guess what" she pulled my by my ankle closer to her then grabbed a fistful of my hair making me yelp in pain. "You're gust like him!" Mother screeched pulling me off the bed. I felt pain shoot through my skull as it made contact with the wall.

She suddenly let go of my hair only to walk around my room pulling my clothes out of the drawer and setting them in a pile on my bed. She pulled out my converse and every other thing I owned throwing it on the bed. Then she she pulled out the collection of journals I had written since I knew how to write and threw them on the bed. I watched in horror as Mother pulled out a lighter and slowly lit my bed on fire. She looked me in the eye as her shrill laughter vibrated throughout the room.

The pages of my journals turned to ash right in front of my eyes. Those were the only things that held value in my life. Now they were gone. I felt my heart burn as if set of fire with my bed. I was shaking uncontrollably in the corner of my room, feeling as if the whole world crumbled to ash before me. Only I wish I could have burned with it.

"You're selfish..

Useless ...

Unloved..

Wast of space...

A freak ..

Ugly...

No one will ever want you..."

I felt the words pearling into me like weapons of an arrow being shot at my chest as I watched the fire expand. I should sand up and run. Get as far away from the fire as possible. But something was holding me back. A huge part of me just wanted to be taken by the fire along with everything I have ever possessed.

DUN DUN DUUUUN! Cliffhanger hehehe

I hope u enjoyed this chapter :)
No this is not the end of the story

Thanks for reading

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